Why did you eat my mother fucking banana you stupid tiger!?!?!?

You should have been keeping an eye on it. Snooze you lose, dumbass.

Can I has Catnip

Get it yourself, I'm busy answering my fanmail. Dumbass.

* falls over laughing before stealing all of YOUR catnip*

You dare steal from supreme empress CE? *loads a bazooka* You won't get far.

yes I dare still from JOO * Hides under your bed and eats all the nip*

Petty fool. The underside of my bed is rigged with mines.

* starts tossing out defused mines and an empty nip bag * Muhahahaha

Enough! I demand you remove yourself from my sanctuary and kneel before me!

Walks out stoned and giggles as I kneel before the tiny one* LOl ok what ya want. you told me to get it my self so I got it my self

Yes, you shall kneel before my might! *evil laugh*

8 stands up and grabs by scruff and lifts* Why you so tiny

How DARE you! Sic 'im boys! *pack of hellhoundweredirewolves attack*

8 throws stakes and bones and all other kind of yummer look food at them*

Fool! My undead army does not require sustenance or play, merely the flesh of those who oppose me!

lays you over my knee and spanks you for being naughty*

*scratches your face, darts and leaves you locked in the room with the hungry hellhoundweredirewolves.*

knocks on the doors 45 minutes later to be let out8 There all asleep and I bored now

Dear CE,

You keep on calling a lot of people dumbasses...now the real question is...have you ever done such an act that would classify you as a dumbass? XD

Only taking this job reading this bunch of dumb text from you dumbasses. I got a world to take over. Dumbass.

so you just admitted you are a dumbass, and since when will a dumbass ever take over the world?
Then again...people did vote for Zuma XD

You are now trying my patience by comparing me to a baboon.

technically speaking, if I was calling you a baboon, I would've called you a red-ass, not a dumbass :-P

Hell will be a blessing for you when I'm done with you.

Well then I kindly remind you...that if you do what you think about doing, then the red roses will wilt in the lion's hand...and the awesome cup of coffee he just made for you will be shattered on the ground. Maybe that will make you reconsider your actions, and let him live...for a little while longer XD

Give me the coffee and your death shall be swift and painless.

How long will you let me live if I give you this cup of awesomely deliciously brewed java...hail to you as my ruler and promise the same cup of coffee whenever you wish of it?

Until I get thirsty again and you are not around to give me my coffee. Then I shall hunt you down and destroy you.

*kneels down in front of the all powerful empress CE* Then you have my servitude and loyalty....*topples you over on your back and starts give you a belly rub* who's a nice kitty? who's a nice kitty? XD

You seem pretty full of yourself, CE. Is this true?

When you're surrounded by dumbasses you need to feel good for being smarter. Dumbass.

Hehe, nice :3. Also I miss you....

Make me coffee, dumbass.

And how exactly would I get it to South Africa? Also I'm quite serious, I miss you and miss talking to you a lot....does that mean anything?

So CE, what is the current status of the campaign to take over the world?

That information is classified, dumbass. However, since you are a dumbass you should forget within a minute if I tell you.

So far, the pack of rabid dogs have been aquired, army of Hellhoundweredirewolves as well as celebrity status. Next step would be to eradicate all dumbasses.

You saw and heard nothing, dumbass. *MIB flashy memory thingy*

*blinks* You do realize that is just a flashlight, right?

Hmm, last dumbass who used it must have had it set for smart people. A minor adjustment, aaand *flash*

You just set it from spot light to flood. You bought that thing off Ebay didn't you?

My sources are not limited to your 'ebay'

Well wherever you got it, you might want to get a refund. I think you got ripped off.

I'm afraid I have to kill you now.

I didn't want to do this but you leave me no choice. *scruffs*

*howls*

*returns CE to EC* Here, she is your clone, you settle her down. Plus I think she has been using your PayPal account again.

*scratches EC in the face* just give it a minute, they'll be here in a second.

And just who is "they"?

*pack of hellhoundweredirewolves come bursting through the door* My puppies.

*scratches the puppies' ears* Oh these guys. They love me, remember? Woah! *gets knocked over and covered in licks*

That's the blood from the gigantic wound in your neck they are lapping at.

SoSay the woman at the front counter just got your coffee wrong and you handle it calmly. Give it back to her and she re does it but you notice its STILL WRONG how would you handle this situation?

I would ask her if she wishes to be annihilated and promptly call her a dumbass, and threaten to destroy her immediate family should she bring it to me wrong again, whilst thrusting the burning coffee into her face and violently shaking a first, after which I would yell obscenities. Duh, dumbass.

Awesome! Thanks for answering.

Yeah yeah, go make me coffee.

dear C.E. what's "shaking a first"?

It's one of the main ingredients for a cup of shut the fuck up. Dumbass.

haa~ and go make you coffee?

You will make me coffee or be annihilated.

Zenni has a question for CE, "Would you like me to get rid of your kinder half?"

You state that as if I havn't thought of it. The plan is in motion, dumbass.

But at least if I do it, you can go and get your own alibi, for someone like you, I'd do it free of charge.

You would do it for free indeed, since I would enslave you if I had wished such an act to be done.

To be enslaved one must have a venerable mind, but mine is far too broken already for such an act to be performed. Nor would you be able to break the darkness long enough to even see my mind.

I do have my ways of persuasion. *claps paws together twice as an army of 200 000 Hellhoundweredirewolves begin appearing in the distance.*

Violence and threats, the persuasive ways of the weak-minded. A true evil can control with the utterance of simple words. Alas, violence is simple to counteract, remove the threat, and there are no longer means for persuasion. *Winks, draws a dagger, and snaps his fingers, the wolves collapse in pieces* Do you have anything more effective?

You have drawing skills how many years did it take you to get this good??

I was born with advanced artistic skills and an excellent eye to spot error, however I do not draw. The abominable being I was cloned from, however does draw. I often sit on her head offering my advanced insight to improve her work but my commentery is often ignored and deemed offensive. What a dumbass.

Lol

do you like romantic guys or do they annoy you because they dont get to business fast enough for you?

I have absolutely no interest in petty things such as love and sex. My only agenda is to plot and execute world domination. Dumbass.

fair enough! feel free to call if you need any help with that. the only use you might have for me is being a meatshield though but im always glad when i can help :P

Hmmm, meatshield. Yes, yes... I could indeed have a use for you.

Why did my hunger come back with enough of a vengeance to make batman look positively passive?

You obviously have not eaten enough. Dumbass.

true....


Where exactly are you getting the funds to take over the world? It seems seems disadvantageous for a company to fund this since you'd later wipe out their consumers.

I have my sources. After all, I am an evil genius.

Dumbass.

Your sources are obviously too gullible... that or they agreed to something without reading the contract you likely had them sign. Nothing more evil then contracts....


Well since your planning to rule the world... is it cool with you if I move to an island away from the ever expanding masses of stupid people? Some days I can feel my IQ dropping and I'd rather preserve what little I have left.

Do as your wish, your enslavement is a matter of time.

Excellent then carry on and have fun locating me.

why did you choose this website?

That moronic decision was made by this foul beast I would rather have joined letstakeoverthewold.com or worlddomination101.net . Please refer to youareadumbass.lol for further information.

ha! such websites dont exist! >83

Not to the public. My people are good with firewalls.

friends...surre...

Can I have a hug?

No. Dumbass.

I will give you a never ending supply of catnip ;3

A fine offer, but a genius' mind must remain clear.

You may be good at world domination, but my real question is how are you with mad science?

I have well paid scientists at my disposal for that particular matter. My skills mostly lay in plotting, organization and interrogation.

What would it take to join this team? >:3

Master's degrees in nanotechnology, astronomy, several forms of biology and coffee making.

In that case, I'll take my computational physics to some other evil scientist team. Problem?

I don't think I have the courage to ask.

Yes tremble before the supremacy of CE!

Why wont you hug me!?!?! Too high and mighty for the scruffy wolf!?

CE does not do hugs. You might want to talk to this imbecile though. She seems to have a fondness for the things.

IS THAT SO!?

I can like to be wearing a jean pant.

No, you can like to be making me coffee.

Have you ever considered switching to decaf? :P

Blasphemy!

dear ce i know you have a coffee craze so if you could live any where in the world that where would it be also which country would you prefer to get coffee from.

I would set up my base somewhere in Columbia or the Himalayas where the finest Arabica is grown.

So what happens if we all bow down to the shapely set of stripes that is EC?

You get to be my slaves and make me coffee instead of dying a slow horrible death.

XD

Did I put a uri object reference in my view wrapper object?

I'll have to get back to you on that one.

As it turns out, no I didn't.
Another query, if I may: What happens when you watch way too much star trek and sit next to a sketch pad?

Nice tits!

You pervert! I have the body of a baby cub!

Really now? You smell of mint.

How do you plan going about world domination? Is there anything you need assistance with?

I could always use meatshields to protect me from earth's various armies, as well as a kitchen staff to supply me with bottomless coffee. Depends on what you are skilled in.

Im skilled in both actually =D

How do you take your coffee? i normaly have mine with lots of sugar and cream.

Four spoons of sugar, little bit of milk. I dare you to present it to me incorrectly.

then i must ask, heaping spoons or regular spoons of sugar? and do you like anything with your coffee? food wise i mean, like scones or coffee cake?

*looks at the tiny CE* you are too small, but anyways, Why are you such a dumbass?

*laughs* Do you have any idea who I am?

yes, yes i do, and i still think you are being a dumbass CE. Too bad  electrocat cant get rid of you by law...

*draws a long katana covered in sinister-looking runes* Any place for a master of the unholy and his many weapons in your army, milady?

That does sound useful. Very well, stand next to my throne and extend a paw to hold my coffee.

*walks up in hooded trench making an offering of 400kg of the best ground coffee waiting to see if u even respond*

I shall grant you a week's extension on your meaningless life in exchange for your fine wares.

i also have the deed to the farm and protection right for it, hurt me in any way they will burn and anyone can steal it

for now though most produce goes to you im taking 20% as i did the work to get it

Call me what you will, but I must protest one part of your plan for world domination.

No matter how many meatshields you have at your disposal, eventually they will be disposed of. What will protect you then?

(It is with this in mind that I humbly offer my services as a healer to keep your meatshields alive, and as a tactician to aid in directing them. *bows*)

I must ask, did you create Windows CE? If that's true, Microsoft doesn't seem to recognise you as the developer.

OH great and wise CE, what is hte meaning of our existance?

All hail the allmighty CE, our lord and master!

When shall you take over the world and force us all to worship you?