Gah! It's been awhile since I've updated anything here. I've been quite busy...but...I've finally started writing again (as some seen on my story posted last week). The lovely sandorvamp has got me back writing and drawing again and at none other than my good old fandom Hannibal Lecter, particularly Rinaldo Pazzi fanfiction, as what she does. What fun it is too! I know it's not very popular here...Lecter fanfiction's a dying breed. :( But it makes us happy.

And then this...my tribute to Ducky.

Banner I did of Ducky throught all his life's short stages. Even the middle one where he was most sick...You can also find this on DA and FurAffinity. I am thinking about also doing a music sideshow for him as well as a few other things.

We had Ducky's urn blessed last weekend. It was quite a beautiful thig our priest did too, he didn't just sprinkle some water on it and say 'there. Here you go.'. R couldn't be there because of his back aching more so than usual (he's visiting a chiropractor three times a week now and who also now has his disability) but we had him put on speakerphone so he could be there in some way so to speak.

Ftr put Ducky on the alter, and after looking at some of Ducky's photos, spoke a small eulogy about Ducky's short life, what dogs bring us. He then spoke to R over the phone and wished blessings on his improving health and happiness and to help heal the wounds of Ducky's loss as well. He then laid hands on Duck's wee urn and collar. I left in tears.


And on another note...we have been mourning over Ducky quite abit this month but we feel we've healed somewhat (We have Ducky's urn set up in the dining room along with his collar/harness, toys, and favorite blankets)...we've decided to look for another corgi (R wants one to look just like Ducky...I...not so much. He even wanted to name another one Ducky...I had to decline. Ducky's Ducky. We already have Ducky and not looking for a replacement...at least I'm not) In fact we contacted a breeder last week and talked to her for hours - told her the whole story - and we hit it off very well! She said she had already sold her last litter but she had a female expecting in February and the puppies would be available in April/May if we're interested(and also stated she had a three year health guarantee). We said we'd think about it and email her our decision, she also wanted to see pictures of Ducky so when he emailed her back I sent some of the best I had. We also told her we would like to come out this week to see her corgis, she gleefully obliged.

Yesterday...we got a call from her and she said she had a 14 week old male corgi she had brought back due to the family changed their mind and asked if we would wanted to come out and look at him, he's leash and house trained and already has his first two rounds of shots. She also sent us some photos of him last night.

http://www.deviantart.com/users/out.....com/64027.html

He's cute. R is like a kid on Christmas morning but I am...anxious and a little apprehensive. I mean don't get me wrong, I want the dog BAD, I'm as giddy as a school girl just thinking about getting another one, but think about it guys. The first corgi we got was...well...screwed up from bad breeding and we had to take him back. The second, Ducky, was ripped from us after we had bonded with him sooo deeply and died in a matter of DAYS. So...it's scared the hell out of me...these things still bounce through my head, I'm sorry I just can't help it...I wonder if it could be something with this apartment, maybe something wrong with the food we were feeding him. I mean, it was premium dog food but still...that don't mean shit these days. Or it could have just been genetic and something Ducky was just going to contract or had it and never showed any symptoms until the end but I guess we'll really never know more than Ducky had lymphoma and it killed him. THAT'S the kind of stuff in my head right now.

Part of me wants another dog, very much so, especially after seeing the photos, but part of me's worried this dog could end up contracting something and getting sick so I'm afraid to get attached again. It's quite sad really. No, it's torture.

All I know is no matter what. We will still honor and love our Duck. Bless him, If I ever have to move him around or R requests his urn to hold I kiss it and wish him well before he's set back in place.