This is a journal to myself that i made and someone saw and told me to post for others. maybe it will be helpful to you.

Dear Younger Me,



Hello, this is the Future You writing to warn or sway you away from some things that will change your life dramatically. This is a warning, Guard your heart and your mind at all times, but in case you don’t understand I’ll start from the beginning. MAY BE GRAPHIC AND MORBID

Dear Younger Me, don’t trust any man mom brings into the house other than Dad. They will hurt you in ways a child shouldn’t comprehend, you won’t fully understand what happened to you until it resurfaces when you’re in your twenties during therapy.

You’re old enough at this point to know how to wash yourself and your brother. DO not let another man touch you to “wash you.” No matter how much they insist, “mom told them to.” That is a lie. Do not buy the lie!

Do not trust the man your Mother decides to marry. He is a sadist Tattoo artist who like to hurt others. He will hurt you. Bad. Plus, He will attempt to kill you and your brother, Not Once, But Twice! Once drowning in the bath, another time with a gun.

Dear Younger Me You are now your brothers caretaker, make sure he wears a helmet, a lot. He will crack his skull more than once. He brain is still developing and he will need as many brain cells as he can keep.

Please make sure you teach him to walk. If not he will not learn until he is three. Which causes problems later on in his life, he has enough to deal with as it is. Don’t want to make things worse.

Read little brother a book everyday, and have him read with you, he has bad dyslexia and earlier the treatment the better, he will fail a lot due to his learning issues, so any help he gets will be a plus.

Don’t get upset at him calling you “mother” sarcastically. You’re doing great and you are, in a way, his mother, you are raising him.

Dear Younger Me, Tell Dad Stacy is hurting you and your little brother. She will leave bruises the size of her fist on you and will make you wear clothes that disguise them. Don’t wait until you get horrible flashbacks 2 years later to tell someone.

Oh, and get help, you have PTSD already and its manifesting in your life.

Dear Younger Me, Stop Crying, it only provokes them to hurt you more.

Dear Younger Me, ask for advanced classes. Being bored will only make your grades slip.

Dear Younger Me, learn to be a child. You need to interact with children your age and learn to act your age. You don’t have to be “mommy” anymore, you can live now.

Dear Younger Me, Don’t try to be cool. You are cool just the way you are. Believe me. It will become the cool thing soon enough to be a nerd.

Dear Younger Me, Don’t stop drawing. I know dad tore up your art books and your art supplies. But keep it in your locker at school and in your diary. He wont find it there. One day your going to want your art skills to be honed!

Dear Younger Me, Don’t let anyone tell you what to study, becoming a CAN and going to nursing school will ruin you. You will be damaged mentally and physically from the ordeal.
And keep going to school. You will want that college degree and will want better jobs than Fast food and restaurants.

Dear Younger Me, Don’t Drink. You will end up an alcoholic and will end up doing a lot of stuff you will regret the rest of your life.

Dear Younger Me, Check for HPV. You will have to get treated and have surgery if you don’t catch it in time. I waited to long and it manifested to cervical cancer. It’s gone now. But you will always be scared it will come back.

Dear Younger Me, Don’t do Drugs. I’m serious, even experimenting will lead you to be raped, beaten, sick and lose a lot of good in your life.

Dear Younger Me, the girl who you think is your best friend is a bad influence. Stop hanging around her. She will only lead you wrong then leave you with a whole in your heart the size of Texas.

Dear Younger Me, Vero Beach is a good place. Move there ASAP. This is where you will b helped a lot by the Women’s Refuge and you will meet your best friend here. Oh and cant forget, you will meet an amazing man Named Mike; He will be love you have been waiting for. He will become your Husband.

Dear Younger Me, Save all the money you can. You will need it!

Dear Younger Me, Seek help, don’t push people away. They are around you for a reason at this point in life. They will help you overcome and will help you learn.

Dear Younger Me, Even if these words of advise don’t reach you in time, don’t worry. You will still make one Heck of a fighter and a strong woman. You have survived being beaten, deaths doorstep twice, and being almost killed four times. You survived abuse, rape, manipulation, and homelessness. You survived broken hearts and body. You overcame. You are AMAZING. Now remember that next time something comes up that you think is too big to handle.

With love,
Future Me