Emotional Ensarement

I’ve bled tears from every piece of my heart,
Some you could see, and some you wondered to start,
Enough to erode the glue that’s held me together,
Until I slowly and painfully wither from my emotional tether,
No longer can I grasp onto the failed concepts of my past,
As I clutch at what few pieces of myself remain breathlessly aghast,
A future enshrouded by worries of what will come of my present,
When it’s filled with only hopes and dreams of something more pleasant,
Than the emotional wreck that gasps out these pitiful words,
Even as hyperbole was always something I tried to leave for the birds,
The sun sets on this spiritual crutch I’ve held onto for too long,
The tears will run out eventually and I will again do my soul wrong,
As I try to valiantly trudge through these trenches of self-pity,
Trapped in the wetlands of self-worth as I look to the shining city,
Where my tears will finally end and I’ll have a hand to hold on to,
That of someone I can call my love and will claim me as I do,
How is that possible when I’m unable to even rise to my own feet,
And answer my own call to action without being stuck in my own deceit,
It’s raining on my soul once again and my temperature drops to a new low,
As the realization of my situation brings me to see that distant light in the window,
It’s not that far away; not as far as my own happiness seems to be,
After I’ve spent years in search of someone I would be proud to call “me”,
Even as I’m drowning in my own self-made trench of pity,
It seems as if this light might be the key to uncovering that silver city,
If I could just trudge a little while longer; if my knees have just a bit more,
As my last chance is in that window of elation’s yore,
I cannot fall again as my tear-stained eyes soulfully reveal,
As the world comes out of focus and tries my fate to seal,
The darkness calls me again and calls me to wash myself once more,
To never return to this miserable world in a whole only I can bore,
The light blinds my shaded and stained eyes as I can almost reach,
Calling me to take my war-ravaged past and a new life to beseech,
The warmth is inviting and caresses my deadened senses,
My heart comes back to life while my body takes on new pretenses,
The world becomes clearer and my breathing slows to a steady cadence,
And my chapped and broken lips crack a smile of defeating the decadence,
The tears fall again as the warmth melts the callouses of my rising soul,
While my dreams and my hopes begin to retake control,
The sunset above the horizon alights the world with a caressing twilight,
A welcome view to the cataracts of misery that once blinded my sight,
My legs finally fail as I fall to a partial and welcome slumber,
As sleepless nights of searching are rewarded beyond number,
When I awaken the light will become one with my warming heart,
As I’ve finally found all I’ve ever wanted… A chance for a new start…
-Halifax Haflinger