Chapter 21

The rest of the car ride Carla explained what was going on, “You see, we’re leaving because I had to be so attentive with you that the house fell into disarray. I don’t know why I didn’t see it sooner but the house was almost irreversibly damaged, I would have had to let you die in order to repair it.”
“I’m so sorry about that,” dashed added shamefully, he felt completely useless, first he runs off into insanity, then he is the sole responsibility of Carla, now he’s responsible for destroying her house.
“Don’t worry about it, I was going to do this anyways if you didn’t show up. Besides, it was only because I was also too busy repairing this baby.” She paused to pat the dashboard of the jeep.
“ Oh, ya I almost forgot to ask you how you got that thing.” Dashed said
I founded it in a ditch by my house a few years ago, I was able to pull it out with an ATV and I had it at some other garage which is probably why you didn’t see it when you were taking care of me.”
“Ah,” dashed said, “I see, so how long have you had it?”
“Oh, about a year and a half, including the months you were out.”
“So how long did it take to completely repair it?” Dashed asked
“Oh, I lost count of the hours long ago, before I met you I played around with it from time to time, never really putting an effort into getting it up and running. Whenever I had free time is when I worked on it. Once you were out I put a serious effort into getting it up and running. I looked all over for the parts and I went through so many repair and gas stations I had to start wearing a mask to stop myself from inhaling fumes.”
Dashed wondered how long they had been driving, he skipped that question not really wanting know the answer.
Without warning Carla shouted, “OH SHIT!” and slammed on the breaks. Dashed, who was lost in thought, slammed his head against the dashboard, “What is it!?! What’s wrong? Bandits, snow drift, aliens?” he personally thought the last one was the most probable.
“No! Even worse, I forgot to play my music!” she smirked, she opened the glove compartment and pulled out a ungodly amount of CDs.”
“That’s why we stopped!?! So that you could…hey…is that blink-182?”
“Yep, I also have The Offspring, Sum 41, Smashmouth, Wheezer, a few techno tracks, and my personal favorite,” she held up an album that had a group of four guys staring out into a city, they were white, the buildings were black, and the rest was blue, the album read, “Zebrahead, MFZB”
“Never heard of them, sorry,” Dashed said, “Are they good?”
“You know it! They are huge in Japan even though they are an Orange County band, This was their third album and in my opinion the best one of them all! Want to hear them?” she asked
“Uhh, sure,” he said, not wanting to piss her off anymore then he undoubtedly made her over the past few months. She pushed in the disk and the first song that played was called “rescue me” After the first rap section Carla started to drive. Dashed looked out the window as he listened to the rapper’s intense lyrics and voice while the chorus’s smooth voice calmed him and prepared him for the next rap section. He was acutely aware of Carla glancing over to him every so often, after the fifth song “The Set-up” he finally burst “Ok what is going on, you keep looking at me, what is wrong?”

Carla was clearly taken aback by his word, she sighed, pulled over and said, “Dashed, I don’t know how to say this otherwise but…”
“But what? What is it Carla?”
In a voice Dashed could barely hear Carla said, “I love you”

Dashed was silent for the longest time, not knowing what to say. Finally we said what was truly on his mind, “And?”
“And what?” Carla asked confused
“Well what did you expect me to do? Fall into your arms crying and congessing my ever present adoration for you? Say that I hate you? I’m asking what did you hope to gain by telling me that. I’m sorry for saying this but I was stuck in a endless summer with four different girlfriends, I’ve had enough love for awhile.”
Carla turned away from Dashed, he could see a tear forming in her eye, “So you ARE saying you hate me”
“I’m just saying, why did you tell me that? I don’t think I’m ready to love a fifth girl yet. I really appreciate what you have done for me and how much time you spent with me but I’m not ready to love yet. I want to love you, I really do, but I’m not ready yet. Let me go through my fake memories, find some way to destroy them and maybe then, just maybe I’ll be able to love once more.”
Carla was crying steadily now, Dashed could tell she was devastated, Dashed could understand but he just couldn’t love anyone right now, not even himself.
“I-If that’s what it takes, then I’ll try to help you in as much as possible. I don’t care what it takes, if that is what it takes for you to love again, then I will.”
She placed a hand on his shoulder, and looked at Dashed, “But I’m still going to love you no matter what, I don’t care what happens to you.”



Well what did you think you guys? Good, Bad, completely awesome! See you next week for the next chapter