Pinkie Pie encounters a twisted version of herself in her nightmares. Will she be able to save her friends from being made into cupcakes?
--
This tale contains weird potions, threatening characters an dangerous situations, but its not an unhappy story and contains no gore, death, swearing, sex or the like.
In an MLP tale? Ye must be joking!
--
This is a little different approach to the 'Pony Nightmare' series. The two previous tales have been inflationary in nature, but this one (although there's one reference to inflation) is more a straight humor/drama kind of story.
Here's the other two stories:

-Luna's Nightmare: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/6763155/

-Rainbow Dash's Nightmare: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/7422921/

Inflation fans do not despair! Ol'Squeaks'll write more tales like that in the future, but he wanted to see what ye made of a story that had a different theme.
Its also the Capn's personal rebuttal to the all too popular fanfiction called Cupcakes which portrayed Pinkie as a deranged cannibal/murderer. In this Ol'Squeaks hopes he could do something to reestablishing Pinkie as the silly well-meaning filly she is rather then the dark and depressing caricature she's often known as.
--

Pinkie Pie vs Pinkamena

“While the candy colored one sleeps, administer.”
Discord had whispered from his stony prison in the palace hedge maze.
“It high time her incessant laughter was broken up by a little good natured fear. Don’t you think Luna? I certainly do…”
The words still burned in her mind as she skulked to the outlandish dwelling of one Pinakamena ‘Pinkie’ Pie. More of a layer cake in appearance then a home, the roof was an ascending white spiral like swirled whip cream, the walls had the texture of gingerbread and colored glass accents in the shape of gumdrops glittered like the real thing from the door. Tall candy cane pillars supported a balcony with the railing trim designed like a flourish of frosting. In the darkness of night it’s awkward bulk looked unnatural against the skyline of normally designed pony houses.
Luna had a special place of resentment for this particular creature.
No longer hatred. Somehow meeting those she had met her defeat by after the fact had deadened her anger, but living on was a lingering, stinging irritation at their happiness and prosperity while she was firmly under the hoof of her royal sister once more. If it hadn’t been for their intervention she might be the one who raised an lowered both glowing spheres, and only then when the whim struck her and her subjects had paid their due reverence and tribute. Celestia was a fool to bring up the sun everything morning without recompense or genuflecting of any kind. Then again Luna had long since decided tact were beyond her elder sibling, replaced with the insipid sap of idealistic nonsense like friendship and kindness.
Now she had a chance to in some small way repay their folly in casting her from on high.
Her sister had given her the potion at first to pay her back for the fun she’d had a local community center with a few hapless fillies and some dark magic. The resulting nightmares had paid her in kind for her own torments and left her reformed…for a time. Then she had followed the chaotic sorcerer’s directive and used the same potion on the blue Pegasus of the group, which seemed to represent Celestia’s private circle. For her whimpers and screams Luna had determined her own nightmares to be just as hers had been: helplessness, abandonment, and finally inevitable oblivion.
But this time would be different.

--

Normally the nightmare used the motif of helplessly inflating like a balloon to cower its victims, but Pinkie was a special case. Luna had attempted a small dosage to see what her reaction would be during an afternoon nap.
And it had been to laugh aloud in her sleep.
The following day she shared her ‘wonderful dream’ with her friends much to Luna’s alarm.
“And then I was getting all roundy and swelly and felt really funny, like I had had every birthday party in Equestria and eaten every cake by myself!” Pinkie had chortled.
Her five pony friends stared in confusion and disquiet.
“Only, every cake was made of fluff. Just fluff. Fluffy fluff. My middle was really soft and pudgy so it might have been fluffy fluff. So anyway I started to float, right? I mean that wasn’t a huge surprise seeing as I was basically a big pink balloon and all.”
“Oh…my.” Fluttershy said in barely a whisper.
“So then I kept getting bigger an bigger and just about when I felt like I was going to pop…!”
Rainbow Dash suddenly looked like she was going to be sick.
“What’s the matter, dear?” Rarity asked, showing concern. “You look a little green.”
“Um…I gotta go….do something.”
She zipped away in an azure blur, beating her wings with all her might.
“Ah, she missed the good part.” Pinkie Pie pouted.
Twilight fixed Pinkie with a firm look.
“Wrong time, wrong story.”
“Oh, sorry.” Pinkie smiled sheepishly. “I guess she’s still a little shook up over her own nightmare. I wish she could have the kind of fun dreams I have!”
“Um…Pinkie?” Applejack narrowed her eyes. “That was the exact same dream she had.”
“Rainbow Dash didn’t think it was as fun as you did, Pinkie.” Fluttershy added, staring at her hooves.
“Really?” Pinkie furrowed her brow. “Then why didn’t she have fun too?”
“I can’t begin to guess.” Twilight laughed nervously.
“Well, I’m off to sleep again!” Pinkie waved cheerfully, turning to trot away. “Maybe I’ll dream that I’m a giant carrot or something! Ooh! Then maybe I could be made into a giant salad…”
As her friends filed away looked more then a little worried about their friends Luna had cursed her luck and vowed to find the weak link in the pink one’s armor if it was the last action she ever accomplished.
And then at last she found it while attending an afternoon ‘tea and gossip’ party Rarity had been considerate enough to invite her to. Pinkie had been too busy with preparing a pet shop anniversary celebration on behalf of her pet alligator Gummy.
“And Pinkie!” Twilight had giggled after her sixth cup of tea.
Little known to the party attendees Luna had added a few drops of another useful potion she’d discovered while raiding Zecora’s stores to the tea pot, one that had the combined effect of gradual euphoria and talkativeness.
“There was that one time she thought we weren’t going to her pet alligator’s birthday.”
“His second birthday,” grumbled Rarity. “I’d be the last speak ill of her, surely, but such a thing was ridiculous.”
“Poor Pinkie Pie was very unhappy I remember.” Fluttershy said. For some reason the tea, far from making her euphoric, was bringing her to the edge of tears.
Whatever was in that magic potion it must have been potent magic indeed.
“And she completely lost it.” Rainbow Dash chimed in, her voice slightly too loud for the situation but her hooded eyes indicating total influence by the tea. “I showed up to drag her butt out because we had this surprise party of our own all set up…”
“Oh yeah!” Applejack chortled, hiccupping. “We spent days keeping that secret.”
“So I walk in and she’s holding a birthday part of her own all right, but all the guests are turnip sacks and piles of rocks and stuff like that! Her mane was all lanky and straight. It was weird…”
“Oh?” Luna said. Her teacup continued to hover close to but never touch her lips.
“Pinkie flipped out when we sprung the surprise party too.” Twilight mused, dreamily stirring her cup with her hoof. “I remember that too. Her mane was straight. She yelled at us too.”
“It was like she was too separate ponies.” Rarity concluded, sipping her cup. “I have to say, Luna, this tea is absolutely delicious!”
“Two separate ponies.” Luna repeated under her breath. “We thank you for the party. It has been most…enlightening.”
It had been a revelation. In her own nightmare Luna had essentially confronted herself, her tyranny and her dark side punished in a viciously ironic fashion. More so even then her anguish that had been what had shaken her.
If the pink one truly had another side to her, that would be her undoing.

--

Luna concentrated hard and assumed her shadow shape, gliding beneath the door and pulling herself back together inside. No one seemed to be around and all she could make out in the gloom of the downstairs room was a table, some chairs, and a loosely organized collection of deserts under glass, many colored balloons, banners, and inexplicable but complex looking mechanical devices on wheels, he ‘party-matics’ if memory served.
In an instant pain shot up her leg and Luna only barely stifled a scream.
When she had stumbled far enough into the moonlight streaming through the window to see she gasped in shock…then glower in fury at the object clinging to her hoof.
A minuscule alligator cub with wide lavender eyes.
Nightmoon Moon might have slung his scaly butt through the glass, but Luna had softened somewhat since then. Unfortunately nothing seemed to coax the creature to leave. Locked in tight, his beak just gripping without breaking the skin, it was still like hauling a small dog around and no amount of rattling it with her magic could shake him.
Finally in resignation she did end up stumping her way along the stairwell, to the upper floor, and even into Pinkie’s room where she slept.
The candy colored pony’s boudoir was no less extravagant then the rest of her lodging. Garish wallpaper, balloons all along the ceiling (Luna really should have known better then to try scaring her with them) and a continuously turning mobile mounted directly above her head with tiny replicas of her friends and associates.
For an awkward moment Luna recognized herself on the mobile and swallowed a lump that had materialized in her throat, for what reason she wasn’t certain.
Then, inch by faltering inch she made her way to loom over the pink one, produced her bottle, poured a measure into her murmuring lips, and lurched her way back to the door.
Done.
Gummy finally let go when she left the premises but he left a nasty welt behind: a reminder to Luna of what she had done and why.
Maybe she wasn’t cut out for vengeance. Whenever she tried it it always seemed to go bad, or make her feel worse.
Still, what had been had been. Now there was only the matter of the nightmare itself.
And Luna didn’t even want to think about the horrors Pinkie must be experiencing at that very moment…

--

“Noooooo!”
Pinkie Pie screamed at the top of her lungs. Her horrified eyes peered into her cabinet, abject despair written all over her face.
“It can’t be! It’s impossible! No no no!”
She lit into the middle of the cabinet’s contents, tossing behind her a cloud of random party supplies, from gag-glasses to multicolored ribbon.
Finally, sobbing, she shut the door and collapsed in a heap.
“My life is over!” she whined, burying her eyes in her hooves. “Why go on now that you have left me?”
A tiny squeak alerted her to the presence of Gummy who had padded up to stand before her.
“Yes Gummy?” Pinkie sniffed. “Have you come to console your Pinkie Pie?”
Then she noticed what Gummy was wearing.
Her eyes widened, brightened, and a massive grin spread from ear to pointed ear.
“YOU FOUND IT!”
She reached down, snatched the party hat from his head and hugged it tightly
“Oh thank you thank you thank you Gummy! You found my favorite hat! If it had gone missing I don’t know what I’d do. It would have been an absolute nightmare!”
Gummy, in his usual stoic way, said and did nothing in response.
Pinkie placed the love-worn hat on her head and smiled at the familiar feel.
“This was my first party hat.” She aloud. It might have been to Gummy but he continued to stare unblinkingly at the wall. “Back when I held my first party! Sometimes a hat isn’t just a hat, Gummy. Sometimes a hat is…more then a hat. I mean it might not look like more then a hat and mostly it is just a hat but…I’m sure you can see where I’m going, right?”
Gummy said nothing.
“Oh good!”
She trotted to her mirror to adjust the chinstrap.
“Still looking good, Pinkie. You’re one lean mean party making machine!”
Slowly but surely she became aware of something off.
Generally this happened when something was missing or misplaced, but this was a different kind of ‘off’ today. Something was added that hadn’t been before.
Someone more specifically.
She turned and saw another medium sized pony standing nearby, not doing a great deal besides standing but that wasn’t what immediately made Pinkie shiver.
Her coloration was exactly the same as Pinkie’s. That might have been normal enough (she imagined only a limited pallet of ponies existed anyway and she was bound to meet another pink eventually) but unnervingly the newcomer also had blue eyes, a dark pink mane, and…
She squinted hard.
Yes. One her flank was three balloons! Two blue and one yellow.
The only real difference between her and the stranger was that her mane was straight and overhung one of her baggy eyes. There was also her fiercely unhappy expression.
“Hi!”
Pinkie waved and beamed but the newcomer just continued to glare.
“I’m Pinkie Pie and I want to be your friend!” she said, trying out the direct approach. “You don’t look very happy. Is there anything your new friend can do for you?”
To her dismay the filly responded by grinning. It was a cold, humorless expression, cynical and unfeeling. The very fact that the face wearing it looked so much like her own made Pinkie Pie shiver all over for a second time.
“Gee, I don’t know!” snapped not-Pinkie. “How good are you at staying out of my business?”
“Hmm…” Pinkie narrowed her eyes. “I’m not sure I’m very good at that to be honest.”
“Big surprise.” Snorted not-Pinkie.
“I am usually very good at making people smile!” Pinkie looked worried. “Not like your smile though. That’s a little scary.”
Not-Pinkie laughed. It wasn’t very pleasant either and for the third time Pinkie shook in place.
“Ah, do I scare you little filly?”
“Yup.” Pinkie admitted, forcing herself to grin.
Not-Pinkie chuckled darkly, roving her bloodshot eyes over Pinkie’s apartment.
“Nice place you have here.”
“Oh, its not much but its home.”
The newcomer trotted cautiously to the mantelpiece. There Pinkie kept a little forest of framed photographs featuring her friends, some even taken on their adventures together. Not-Pinkie’s attention focused on a large picture that had the entire group in a pose.
“Are these you’re friends?” she hissed.
“Everyone is my friend.” Pinkie said defensively. “But yes. They’re good friends of mine. I don’t mean not everybody else is a good friend too, but friends are like lollypops. I like all lollypops, but some flavors I just keep coming back to so I’m not playing favorites at all I’m just…”
“Shut up.”
Pinkie squeaked in shock.
No one.
No one had ever.
A tear trickled down her cheek but she quickly rubbed it away, fighting to regain her cheer.
“I’m sorry. Sometimes I can talk too much.”
“Try all the time.” Not-Pinkie snapped. “Friends huh…no one deserves friends.”
In a flash Not-Pinkie had knocked the framed picture to the floor, smashed the glass, and fished out the picture.
“Um…this is my home.” Pinkie grumbled. “Not your home, mine. If you want to smash up precious pictures to you in your home that’s fine, but this is my home. Its not fine here. In fact it was very mean of you!”
“Tough.”
Not-Pinkie stalked to the door, the picture in her teeth.
“Now where are you going?” Pinkie stomped her hoof, rapidly losing her temper.
“To go find you friends…” Not-Pinkie said, her voice slightly quavering. “Oh and by the way, the name is Pinkamena, loser.”
Then she leapt through the door and was gone.
Pinkie sat for a long time, her stunned gaze flashing to the glass on the floor and the door as it swung shut, then open, then shut, then open.
“You…you can’t be!” she managed to sputter at last. “That’s MY name!”

--

“So when did you first have these feelings of persecution?” Twilight asked, scrutinizing Pinkie over her spectacles. Pinkie Pie lay on a park bench as if it were a couch, watching the clouds overhead in thought.
Or in total obliviousness. It was hard to tell.
“Hello. Equestria to Pinki Pie!” Twilight muttered, tapping her hovering note pad with the pencil in her mouth. “You asked me out here for this. You’ve got to help out too.”
“That one looks like a train made out of liquorish with a bear and clown riding on it.” Pinkie chuckled, pointing at the sky. “Oh…um…sorry. Yes! Well, I’ve seen other ponies sit down on couches when they’re upset and they usually get off them feeling much better about themselves.”
“So…why a park bench?”
“I don’t own a couch.”
“Pinkie.” Twilight banished her spectacles and notepad with a flash from her horn. “Psychoanalysis only works if we discuss what’s bothering you. Its hard scientific fact, not just some kind of exercise or game. So tell me, what’s bothering you? As a friend.”
“Um…I might be going cuckoo.” Pinkie said, tapping her hooves together anxiously.
Twilight stared for some time, her expression unreadable.
Finally she said.
“Whatever could have convinced you of that?”
“I keep…seeing myself.”
“Pinkie, were you walking past a mirror when this happened?”
“Actually yes, but I…”
Twilight rolled her eyes.
“Pinkie. This has been fun and all but I really have to get back to work. I have to catalogue a ledger to help me make a list about the importance of listing.”
“Sounds…fun.” Pinkie said sadly. “Well, I’ll go and try to find myself.”
“That’s the spirit.” Twilight chuckled.
“Yeah…” Pinkie looked at her feet as her friend galloped away. “Who knows what I’m up to? Nothing good I’ll bet…”

--

“Do you remember how you were like when you did that whole assertiveness training program because Rarity and me told you to?”
“I…try not to.” Fluttershy said quietly.
Pinkie Pie could see her preparing to closer her front door and quickly darted in so her forehoof blocked the doorjamb.
“Can you try for me?” she asked, fluttering her lashes. “See I kind of…well lets just say that remember how you were…different Fluttershy for awhile?”
“I try not to.” Whimpered Fluttershy.
“You know how you were mean and grumpy and tossed people around and broke things and locked yourself in your house?”
Fluttershy’s reply was so soft it was impossible to hear.
“Yeah, well I seem to have something like that. Only the mean me isn’t me. Well, it is me, only not the me here. It’s another me…somewhere else. She’s me except mean and no me personally.”
“Oh.”
“So what I was wondering is how did you deal with the other Fluttershy?”
“I was the other Fluttershy.”
“But how did you deal with her?”
Fluttershy lay a hoof to her head.
“I…don’t feel so good.”
“Sorry, you get some sleep.” Pinkie said, stepping out of the door.
“Thank you…only it’s the afternoon.”
“I take afternoon naps.”
“Yes, but I really should see that Angel gets his lunch. He’s very particular that it has to be just so and always given to him at exactly…”
A bell rang and Fluttershy gaped in alarm.
“Oh my, right now! Good afternoon Pinkie!”
She zipped away into her house leaving the door open.
Until moments later she returned just as rapidly.
“Oh, and if you want to convince other Pinkie to be good you should do just that: remind her that the Pinkie Pie I know is a good, kind, and caring pony.”
“Thank you Fluttershy!” Pinkie said, blushing.
“You’re very welcome.”
The clock struck again, Fluttershy gasped and slammed the door.

--

“Hello other me!”
Pinkamena looked up from her brooding over a rain puddle to glare at Pinkie as she approached.
“What do you want?”
“I want to be your friend.” Pinkie said. “Unless of course that’s not what you want. I guess what I really want is…for you to be happy.”
She saw a collection of shining objects jabbed into the ground.
“Oh, those are lovely looking knives! I bet you could cut all kinds of things with those.”
“That’s the idea.” Pinkamena sneered. “Have you always been this stupid?”
“Probably.” Pinkie shrugged. “Anyway what do you do with so many knives? Cut up vegetables?”
“Something like that…”
Pinkamena looked off into the distance with glazed eyes.
“Can I help?”
She hesitated, as if battling the urge to spit out another insult. Instead, with reserved and sinister calm Pinkamena said “Yes…”
“So?” Pinkie said, cocking her head. “What do you want me to do?”
She was overjoyed. Maybe she’d finally gotten through to herself with a little common ground!
“I’m holding a party.” Pinkamena growled. “A very special party for a very special pony. I want you to tell the others where and when.”
“Where and when?”
“Your house. The basement. Soon as possible.”
“What will you be serving then?”
Her manic grin returned in force.
“Cupcakes.”
“That’s weird, but okay! I love cupcakes and I’m sure my friends do too!”
“Glad to hear it.”
Pinkie hopped away, filled with renewed purpose and so chipper she quite register her doppelganger snickering in a most unsettling way.

--

“Sounds cool.” Rainbow Dash said, taking up the invitation and scanning it. “Very special party for a very special pony…well that’s me all right!”
“I thought maybe it was!” Pinkie cheered.
“So who’s holding the party anyway?”
“I am.” Pinkie said without thinking.
“You are?” Dash shrugged. “Well, you know how to throw a party that’s for sure. But why a special one? I mean I don’t blame you for sending a little admiration my way. If I wasn’t me I’d be a fan too.”
“Everypony deserves a special super secret surprise party sometime!” Pinkie said, trying to hide her own uncertainty on the subject. “I guess it’s just your turn for one.”
“So what’s on the menu?”
“Cupcakes!”
A sliver of drool crept from Dash’s mouth instantaneously.
“I’ll be there!”
“I’m so happy!” Pinkie said to herself as she hopped away. “I’m making a new friend and making one of my good friends happy too! Nothing could possibly spoil my perfect day!”

--

“Why are all the lights off?” Rainbow Dash asked, squinting into the shadows of Pinkie Pie’s house.
“I don’t know.” Pinkie admitted. “I guess because it’s a surprise party?”
“Could any of the others make it?”
“Nope, just you.”
“Huh.” Dash took a careful step just inside the doorway. “I gotta ask…how can it be a surprise party if I already know it’s a party, where it is, and what’s going on with it?”
“I don’t know.” Pinkie repeated, her smile fixing on her lips. She had to keep smiling otherwise she would have to admit she had no idea what was going on.
“Hi, Rainbow Dash…”
Pinkamena loomed from the darkness, her leer almost glowing in the gloom.
Dash blanched in shock but slowly settled down as she made out the details of the pony standing before you.
“Is she your sister Pinkie?” Rainbow asked after a time.
“I don’t know.” Pinkie murmered.
“Yes.” Pinkamena said, her expression predatory. “I am in fact. My name is Pinkamena.”
“Nice to meet you.” Dash said.
She found her hoof gripped in a pink one and shaken vigorously.
“Won’t you step inside?” she said, beckoning. “The party can’t begin without you.”
“Sure.” Dash said, noncommittally. “You mentioned there would be cupcakes?”
“Oh yes…” Pinkamena purred. “Yes, there will be many cupcakes. All for you.”
“Cool.”
Pinkie Pie followed after, tensely looking around her own downstairs room. Without the lights it looked alien and unwelcome.
“Cupcake?”
Dash was suddenly confronted with a delicious looking one with blue icing held in the hoof of Pinkamena.
“Hot dog!” Dash said happily, reaching for it.
Out of the corner of her eye Pinkie could see the glint of a razor sharp blade held behind Pinkamena’s back.
And in the next instant or so she made the bravest decision of her life.
She bolted between the two, snatched up the cupcake, and bit the majority of it off in one bite.
“Oh, sworry!” she gurgled between chews. “Loogs like no more cupfcake! I gush the party ish over!”
“No!” snarled Pinkamena. “You idiot! You ruined everything!”
“This is getting WAY too weird for me.” Rainbow Dash muttered. “I’ll catch you later!”
Before Pinkamena could do anything Dash had cantered to the door and taken to the sky.
Meanwhile Pinkie had found the chewy sleeping pill center and already she was beginning to fade out of consciousness.
“I…knew you weren’t…a good…party maker…” she sighed.
Then everything went blacker then even if had been.

--

“Wakey wakey…”
Pinkie Pie’s eyes fluttered open. The first thing she saw was her basement walls.
The second thing was her hooves shackled to a makeshift wooden table, all four latched in spread-eagled so she was held prisoner on her back.
Pinkamena was standing nearby, rubbing the blade of a knife with her hoof in a disturbing almost loving way.
“You ruined my party.”
“It wasn’t very fun.” Pinkie said, yawning. “You’ve got a lot to learn about parties! Luckily, your friend Pinkie Pie can tell you all about…”
“No.” Pinkamena took a step forward. “You’ve got a few harsh lessons to learn yourself!”
“I don’t like harsh lessons. I was lousy at those in pony school.”
Pinkamena chuckled, but there was a hint of desperation and impatience in her laughter.
“Why do you always make things into a joke? Why do you always look on the bright side?”
“Um…because I’m Pinkie Pie?”
She didn’t honestly know, but it seemed as good an answer as any then.
“You’ve seen how things can be. How bad.” Pinkamena spun the knife deftly. “You know what its like to be lonely and sad. Why don’t you wish harm on others? Why don’t you want to see them suffer?”
“Because I’d rather make them happy.” Pinkie Pie frowned. “Why would I want to make others feel bad? I don’t like feeling bad. That’s why I throw parties so that ponies don’t have to feel lonely or sad or angry.”
“But parties are so…stupid!”
The knife blade whipped through the air and slammed into the table inches from Pinkie’s head.
“Nice throw!” Pinkie grinned.
“Parties are stupid and you’re stupid!” Pinkamena raved. “You and your stupid little friends and your stupid little town, always so happy all the time always! Why don’t you understand how terrible life can be?”
“You just said I did understand.”
“Obviously not!”
Pinkamena retrieved two other blades, a short one and long one, and approached with menace in her eyes.
“If you did you’d be a mean person and do mean things! You’d understand that anger and fear and nastiness gave you power that all your stupid kindness and friendship can’t equal to.”
“I don’t want power.” Pinkie said, simply. “I also don’t want to be mean. I’m not mean.”
“Clearly you are if I’m you!”
“I don’t know who you are.” Pinkie sniffed. “You look like me but you’re not me. I’d never hurt my friends and I’d never be so mean without feeling really bad about it.”
“Don’t be so naive.”
“If I knew what that meant I’d stop if it would make you happier.”
“Look!”
Suddenly a long gleaming blade was aiming at her chin.
“I’m going to make you into cupcakes and that’s all there is to it.”
“Well…if you’ve got to go….” Pinkie laughed weakly. “I do like cupcakes.”
“Stop being cheerful!”
“I can’t!” Pinkie cried aloud, squeezing her eyes shut. “Its just who I am!”
Then there was a sharp crack.
When Pinkie dared to look she became gradually aware of her hooves feeling…freer.
The shackles were unlocked and hanging open. Pinkamena was holding a wicked looking serrated knife handle-first towards her.
“Take it.”
“Thanks.” Pinkie said, reaching out and taking it in hand. “Its not my birthday, but I’m glad you’re entering into the spirit of giving!”
“I’m going to force you to fight for your life. Either I kill you or you kill me!”
“What if we just don’t kill anypony?” Pinkie offered nervously. “We could have a lot more fun…”
“Either way this ends you’ll never be a nice and cheerful pony again.” Pinkamena seethed. “Come on. Get me!”
“Okay!”
Pinkie leapt off the table, blithely tossed away the knife and seized Pinkamena in a hug. Pinkamena was so taken off guard she dropped her weapon, staggered back against a table and found herself pinned.
“Get off me!”
“Okay!”
Pinkie hopped backwards, grinning.
“See this is much more fun then killing anypony!”
Pinkamena desperately scanned the floor but both blades had skittered out of sight.
“Do I have to murder you with my bare hooves?” she shrieked.
“You don’t have to and I think I’d prefer you didn’t.” Pinkie responded, her smile slipping. “Why don’t you like me?”
“Because you’re a pest!”
“No I’m not. I’m a pony.”
With a howl of wordless rage Pinkamena sprung forward and Pinkie with a yelp took the stairs up from the basement, clattering her way to the upper floors with her twin in pursuit.
In the upstairs room Pinkie quickly located her table piled high with deserts and made for it. Even as Pinkamena came raging up from the cellar Pinkie had in hand two seven layer cakes and she hurled them with all her might as soon as she caught sight of her hateful eyes. The resulting storm of frosting coated Pinkamena from head to hoof. Her feet struck a patch of the stuff and she skidded into the mantelpiece with a loud thud close by the broken picture frame.
“Oops.” Pinkie grimaced, hopping over to Pinakmena’s prone form. “I didn’t mean for that to happen! I was just trying to arrest you with cake for a bit till I figured out what to do.”
“I’ll…kill…you!” her twin slurred, kicking her gooey hooves in the arm furiously.
“I’m sure you will, but right now I think I better get the paramedic ponies.”
Pinkamena slowly stood on her wobbling hooves, gripping a broken piece of glass like a dagger.
“Where’s…your friendship…now?” she panted, taking a halting step forward. “You’re all alone and helpless!”
Suddenly Pinkie caught sight of something on the far wall. Her smile returned, quavering but strong.
“Not quite yet!”
It took only a spirited bound to reach the cabinet, a quick movement with her nose to open its doors, and daring but curtailed scurry to get within range of Pinkamena and deliver her ultimate weapon.
It fit perfect.
“What?” Pinkamena’s rheumy eyes shot up as if she could see what was perched just in front of her ears. “What is this? What have you done?”
“Oh nothing.” Pinkie said, studying her pedicure. “Check out the mirror to see.”
“This is a trick.”
“Then you won’t go to the mirror.” Pinkie chuckled. “I’m not the boss of you. Make up your own mind!”
“I am you!” Pinkamena said cruelly.
“Well if there’s anything of me in you you’d know what’s on your head.”
Pinkamena battered at the object nestled in her mane but it wouldn’t come lose. A strap held it tightly around her head.
Finally she trotted to the nearby mirror and looked in.
She stared at herself for a long time and at the faded party hat roosting on top.
Then after so time the glass shard slipped from her hoof, smashing to the floor.
And Pinkamena began to weep.
“You remember that first party?” Pinkie said, cheerily resting her hoof on her twin’s shoulder as she looked into the mirror herself. “The one that started it all. Not our biggest. Not our best…”
“Our…” Pinkamena said, mouthing the word uncomfortably.
“But it was great!” Pinkie said, drawing Pinkamena close into a friendly clinch. “And if you’re anything like me you remember how great it was. You made a lot of ponies happy.”
Pinkamena tried hard to smile. The action seemed unfamiliar, nearly painful.
“We’ll always make ponies happy. It’s what Pinkie Pie does!”
She held out a cupcake on a plate for Pinkamena to see. She was reluctant to touch it.
“Don’t worry, silly! It’s the tasty kind.”
Her twin took it in hoof, took a bite…and grinned.
“Is Pinkie Pie your friend?”
“Um hmm….” Pinkamena burbled through a mouthful of cupcake.
“Sorry?” Pinkie giggled. “I can’t hear you with your mouthful!”

--

“And then we laughed and played games and sang songs until nightfall and she told me scary stories!”
Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash stared.
“There was one about Twilight and spiders and one about Rainbow Dash and some kind of factory and then there was one about…”
“Pinkie…” Twilight began to say, checking herself quickly.
“Yes Twilight?”
“Um…maybe you might not try eating sweets and cakes and things before you go to bed? This is the second nightmare you’ve had it a row.”
“Nightmare?” Pinkie laughed. “Are you kidding? I got to hang out with my imaginary sister all night long!”
“Why is it always me who seems to get messed up in your dreams?” Rainbow Dash asked, folding her hooves. “Do you have something against me or something?”
“I’m certainly glad I’ve never had a scary dream.” Fluttershy said. “Of course once I did dream of a giant butterfly. I woke up screaming.”
“I remember.” Rarity said, patting her on the back reassuringly. “Well, with any luck the rest of us will be spared these…bizarre flights of fancy, yes?”
“I don’t know…” Twilight grinned mischievously. “Could be kind of fun…”
The stares of the other’s switched from Pinkie to her.
“Hey, I’m just saying! From a research perspective” she murmured, blushing.

--

“Great.” The statue of Discord sighed. “I think if something like that can’t reach her we’re free to assume she has the IQ of a vegetable and move on to greener pastures.”
“Like who?” Luna asked. “The purple one? The yellow one? The white one?”
There was a pause. Luna knew this meant he was thinking.
“How about…” Discord let loose with a rumbling laugh. “Your own dear sister?”