So, my co-workers and I were bored, and we started talking about those '80s cartoons we all used to watch and love. And what were the '80s without the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles who, we all agreed, had a toyline as ridiculously lavish as Barbie's. We even found a website thate that shows the entire line! So we ran through it, laughing at the Turtles' illustrious careers as cowboys, astronauts, and even cavemen!

But one figure in particular stood out as being particularly hilarious, and that was Sumo Michaelangelo (www.ninjaturtles.com/toys/1995/sumomike.htm )! It struck me as funny that, yes, most likely after their teenage metabolisms finally gave up, all that pizza and whatever else they ate would probably go straight to their, well, everywhere! Too fat to be ninjas, what other logical choice would the Turtles have than to become sumo wrestlers, another aspect of Japanese culture? So here he is, in all his glory, Sumo Mike! Feel free to start throwing your stones at my blasphemy, but remember that Mirage and Playmates came up with it first!

Michaelangelo, even as big as he is, still belongs to Mirage Studios USA