Here is my next chapter, it's shorter but trust me the next one will be longer, that being said it will take longer to upload but hey, I'll try to get it done as soon as possible.
The Jaunt: Chapter: The Big Mistake
Chris tried to flag down the police car; he went out into the middle of the street and waved his arms frantically. The police car didn’t seem to slow down, in fact if anything it seemed to speed up and…
“OH SHIT!”
Chris jumped out of the way just in time to prevent his internal organs to be turned into jelly. He smashed into the gravel and slid a good three feet before smashing his head against a large rock, which caused him to stop violently. He head throbbed and he was sure he heard something crack. Reached his hand to the back to his head to feel for blood, there wasn’t any. He opened his eyes to two wolves standing over him, and it was clear they weren’t cops…they were something much, much, much worse.
The dangerous looking wolves looked like something out of a movie. The first one had a bandoleer running across his chest with shotguns shells lining each socket. His coat was all black and had some strange markings of the Lupine Cell Group stitched onto each shoulder. His face had one large scar running across his face, which led to his eye that was covered by a patch. He wore military grad boots and had several different grenades attached to his combat fatigues. The second one was even worse, his faced was covered with a gas mask. He carried an MP5, which was currently pointed at his head, ready to kill him if he so much moved…well besides his constant shaking. His outfit was splattered with blood, his gloves were covered with bloody scales and his uniform was torn from dragon claws…desperate dragon claws.
The second one breathed through his gas mask and poked Chris’s chest with the barrel of his gun, “What should we do boss? Kill him like the rest?” his voice was muffled and his face was non-existent, Chris did all he could to keep his bladder under control. The other wolf laughed evily, “No, lately our funds have been running a little low, our pay checks have suffered as a result, how ‘bout we make some money?”
The Second one lowered his gun and gruffed, “Whatever you say boss, but I didn’t watch my friends die to just let the cancer of reptiles grow.”
The commander pulled out a cigarette, lit it, and blew the smoke into Chris’s face, causing Chris to cough. He inhaled once more and kicked Chris in the face…hard. Chris passed out but not before thinking one final thought
“Well shit”
The Jaunt: Chapter: The Big Mistake
Chris tried to flag down the police car; he went out into the middle of the street and waved his arms frantically. The police car didn’t seem to slow down, in fact if anything it seemed to speed up and…
“OH SHIT!”
Chris jumped out of the way just in time to prevent his internal organs to be turned into jelly. He smashed into the gravel and slid a good three feet before smashing his head against a large rock, which caused him to stop violently. He head throbbed and he was sure he heard something crack. Reached his hand to the back to his head to feel for blood, there wasn’t any. He opened his eyes to two wolves standing over him, and it was clear they weren’t cops…they were something much, much, much worse.
The dangerous looking wolves looked like something out of a movie. The first one had a bandoleer running across his chest with shotguns shells lining each socket. His coat was all black and had some strange markings of the Lupine Cell Group stitched onto each shoulder. His face had one large scar running across his face, which led to his eye that was covered by a patch. He wore military grad boots and had several different grenades attached to his combat fatigues. The second one was even worse, his faced was covered with a gas mask. He carried an MP5, which was currently pointed at his head, ready to kill him if he so much moved…well besides his constant shaking. His outfit was splattered with blood, his gloves were covered with bloody scales and his uniform was torn from dragon claws…desperate dragon claws.
The second one breathed through his gas mask and poked Chris’s chest with the barrel of his gun, “What should we do boss? Kill him like the rest?” his voice was muffled and his face was non-existent, Chris did all he could to keep his bladder under control. The other wolf laughed evily, “No, lately our funds have been running a little low, our pay checks have suffered as a result, how ‘bout we make some money?”
The Second one lowered his gun and gruffed, “Whatever you say boss, but I didn’t watch my friends die to just let the cancer of reptiles grow.”
The commander pulled out a cigarette, lit it, and blew the smoke into Chris’s face, causing Chris to cough. He inhaled once more and kicked Chris in the face…hard. Chris passed out but not before thinking one final thought
“Well shit”
Category Story / Miscellaneous
Species Lizard
Size 120 x 120px
File Size 11.6 kB
Interesting. A touch of racism! Though how to make it better. You seem to have good grammar and sentence structure all ready. You probably don't need me proofreading your work. Ever thought of extending your descriptions of things just a bit? This chapter seems a little short for what is going on.
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