The following is a photograph and transcript of a once-thought lost audio tape of an interview with one of the city's most elusive monsters.

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Journalist: Ladies and gentleman, I am here with the sewer-dwelling, man-eating lizard only wishing to be called Rick. Rick, I first would like to thank you for allowing me to come to your home and interview you for the public, and specifically your fans. Please excuse any contorted movements my face makes, I'm not quite used to the smell, here.

Rick: Heh-heh, not a problem. Not many people have time to get used to the smell when they're here with me. You're down here long enough, and your nose gets numb to it. And the interview is my pleasure. Once I heard Ben Devoreaux went missing, I knew it would be safe to release information about me. The fact that I actually HAVE fans surprises me, but hey...more power to 'em, I guess.

J: Well, let's get right down to it, shall we? I have a list of questions that fans submitted to my office, and we're just going to rattle through them, alright?

R: Sounds like a plan to me. I'll answer as honestly as I can.

J: Splendid. Okay, EclairTalon says, "Rick, how hard was it getting adjusted to the sewers after being exiled down there?"

R: Hmm, well the first few days were an absolute nightmare. I hadn't been accustomed to the environment; ya know, the smell, the dark, all that. I was really home-sick, and I just wanted things to go back to normal. It wasn't until I actually became fused with the sewer slime down here that I began to realize that I could make it down here. Of course, after that, there was no turning back. That event turned me into the monster that I am, today.

J: Very interesting insight there, Rick. Okay, next question: Slingblade_47 writes, "Question for you, Rick - how do you feel you are seen by the society you inhabit?"

R: I like think that I am seen as what I am: a smelly, slimy monster who hunts the people of the surface for pleasure and food. Like I said, the fact that I have fans really surprises me. I don't know whether to be flattered or offended because I haven't done my job.

J: That's very understandable. Moving on, metalgear500 asks, "How many humans can you fit in your belly?"

R: Haha, that's always a fun thought. Since most humans are just a little shorter than me, I can fit one in with plenty more room to stretch, so most likely I can get two in there at once without my stretchy skin coming under stress. If I get a group down here, I'll usually just let my slime take care of them, and absorb the nutrients after they've been digested that way. Of course, that doesn't beat getting to watch them squirm as they melt away inside me.

J: Disturbing...but interesting nonetheless. Alright, darklord92 submits, "what does your diet consist of down there :P"

R: Down here, I try not to eat anything, unless a few maintenance workers happen to come down to work on the pipes. My main diet is the good people of the surface. Both physical and sexual appetites are filled by my victims. Whatever floats around down here is already used, and can't help me, much.

J: You weren't kidding when you said you'd be honest. Next, Starcomet has a two-parter, "Do you plan on mating with anyone? Your thoughts on having children?"

R: Oh wow...uh, actually, before I exiled myself down here, I...uh...I had a wife. She was a very beautiful lizard lady by the name of Pandora. Working for ETNHS was supposed to be my dream job, setting me up to provide for a family we planned on starting. When things went bad, I had to abandon all of that. To this day, she still probably thinks I'm dead. Pan, honey...if you hear this, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about how much I love you. I'm sorry for what I had to do, and I hope you've been able to find happiness without me. *sniffle*

J: So the monster still does have a heart. Fascinating to learn. Not getting too far off of that subject, Leaf-Mithras inquires, "Rick, do you have any friends to hang out with, or are you a keep-to-yourself kinda guy?"

R: I don't think anyone could stand the smell of me to want to stick around to be my friend. I usually keep to myself, but every now and then, I'll have a guest down here with me. Though...they're down here against their will, but that makes it so much more fun. Their reactions are what makes their last moments so much of a joy for me.

J: Fair enough. Okay, Kokomai poses, "Question for Rick - What makes a day or night absolutely perfect for you?"

R: A perfect day or night, huh? Hmm...well, it would start of with getting a couple victims down here and sticking one to the wall in a nice, thick cocoon of slime, so they can watch me have my way with the other one. Now, if it's perfect, then the two will know each other and be quite close, so it'll hurt that much more while I dominate their friend. I'd probably bind the one not on the wall with my slime, or even use my pet...

J: You mean that semi-sentient bubble that you make out of your slime?

R: Yes, that's the one. I'd use it to trap them so I could play with them, maybe see how long they could survive without air before they start to fade, then I'd let my slime digest them and come back to me, so I could get the nutrients and energy. As for the other, I'd pull them down and eat them the old-fashioned way. Or...maybe I'd bed with them for the night and use them for breakfast the next day. Ah, so many possibilities...

J: Truly you have a sickening way about you, Rick. I can see why they call you a monster. Finally, Zeara sends, "Rick, could you ever see yourself returning to life or are you too far gone? "

R: Oh no, no I can't return to life up there the way I am. Society wouldn't have me, and I've let my vices and urges control me for too long. I would have loved for things to turn out differently so this wouldn't have happened, but there's really no sense in lamenting over things you can't go back and change. I am a sewer monster now, and that's what I'll be until the sewer takes me.

J: Well, thank you so much for your time, Rick. Do you think I could...snap a quick picture for our site? I'm sure the fans would love to see you in all your glory.

R: Yeah sure, let me whip up something saucy for the people to gawk at.

*Squelching and stretching sounds*

J: So, that just comes out of your hands? Ugh, it smells absolutely vile!

R: Yeah, or any part of my body. My skin can secrete it and absorb it on command. My slime is my companion, but also my most deadly weapon.

*Click*

J: Okay, I got it! Thanks, this is going to look great. Heh...hey, no need to get so close now. Uh...what are you going to do with that slime?

R: I reckon I'm gonna cover you with it. That picture, and this interview are never going to see the light of the surface. You think I'd be so stupid as to give away all that about myself? No...you're mine...we're gonna have so much fun...

J: N-no! No, you can't do this! I'm a member of the press! Help! Somebody h-hmmph! Mmmph! Mrrph!

*Chuckling and incoherent muttering as the muffled screams get fainter and fainter. The tape continues running until it is used up*

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A big thank you to all of you who sent in questions for this project! I really hope you enjoyed the outcome!