but god damn it, I'm going to try.

I love you more than any person or thing living on this earth. I love you more than the earth itself. I love you so so so so so so much that it hurts sometimes. I never mind, though, because it's the kind of pain that reminds me that I'm alive - that I exist and so do you.

When I see you hurting like this, it kills me.

I feel powerless against your pain, powerless to help you overcome it. I don't know what to do. I can't lose you. I just can't. I wouldn't be half the man I am today if I never met you. In reality, I wouldn't even be alive. You've saved me so many times. Can I not return the favor? Am I powerless against your demons? I can't think straight, I can't see straight. I don't know anything for sure when things get like this except for the fact that I LOVE YOU, I love you, I love you, I love you.

I just want to be there for you, to hold you if that's what you want, to listen if that's what you need, to be a verbal punching bag if you need someone to scream at. If you can use me in any way, and if I am useful to you at all, I'm here for you. I'm here. Even if talking to me makes you hate me for a day, a week, a month or six, I wouldn't mind because at least I'd know you were still alive and breathing and capable of that feeling.

I adore you. You're the one that keeps me going. You're the one that inspires me to DO better, to BE better, to BREATHE. I can't imagine living this life without you. I just can't.

You loved me when nobody else would.

I'm sorry for not being there enough, I'm sorry. We don't talk enough and I know it's my fault and I will be around more. I think about you every day, there's not an hour that passes where I don't wonder how you're doing. You are the most important person in my life, please believe me.

I love you. So much.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7zRjc3ZJi0