Firstly, I'd just like to say you have my condolences over this tragedy, it's a real shame when a brand new life is so quickly snuffed out.
Just be sure to pay your respects and comfort your sister. It's not easy to mourn a lost loved one (believe me, we've all been there in some way), but it's imperative
to be strong and soldier on in the face of such a travesty.

this is an especially hard sort of death to deal with.

it's happened far too many times in my own family.
there are at least half a dozen stillborn and infant-death graves in our collective plot,
spread out over the past hundred years.

there's really not much more to say beyond offering condolences for a child whose life was cut far too short. :/

Sometimes I don't know if there's really anything anyone can say to make someone feel better in a situation like this. I think the most important thing you can tell her is that you'll always be there for her to support her whenever she needs you.


Just my opinion, I don't have any experience with this particular situation. Just a general thing I've noticed.

Sorry to hear that, I don't think there is anything that anyone can do but stand by your loved one for support and help them through this.

My older brother has buried not one, but TWO children that had barely begun to live.

So by osmosis I know a thing or two. Also, my condolences for your loss. *hugs*

wow, sorry to hear that. I can only offer the relatively callous sounding lines of 'it wasn't painful' and 'time heals all wounds', but past that, I don't know what would comfort besides being a shoulder to cry on, and just quietly smiling and nodding.

My mother has this idea on pregnancy i find quite beautiful that may make her feel better. the idea is that when a woman's pregnant if the baby doesn't make it it is because they are not yet ready. There was something they needed to get from where they came or have changed before being born. For example they were going to be born with a major birth defect, or the wrong gender or they have a twin they need to go back for (my mom believes I did this one, that she was pregnant with my once then I went back for my brother). So once the baby fixes whatever it needs to fix or gets it's twin or whatever it has to do she should still be able to get pregnant with the same baby again. It may appear there is a difference, like it may be a baby girl rather than a boy, but this is what the baby went back for and it'll still be the same baby. I have heard from people other than just my mom they believe the same thing happened with their kids, they can kinda feel it that it's the same baby. So if she trys again at some point she should be able to get her baby back atleast by this theory.

older brother? I'm not quite sure I understand that

But ya I very much believe this because the signs of it being true are very strong

Oh tator tots older brother that makes more sense well perhaps the brother or perhaps tator herself after all its quite possible that was the reason in their case that tator had come first when her brother was meant to and went back to wait for him you never know but I betchya her mother knows which.

That is a beautiful way of viewing it.. it gives hope that that soul, that spirit, is still there, waiting and ready for her when she's ready.

Dad and I send condolences in this difficult time

It happened to my mother. I was her third child but I an an only child.

Unfortunately there is not a whole lot you can do except allow her go through the grieving process and be respectful and strong. It will be hard and long but she will eventually get better and God willing her next child will be healthy.

Sometimes the best thing one can do is to say nothing at all, and allow the ones who have had their hearts filled with sorrow, stew and find enlightenment on their own.

^ this. What they need is you, not any words.

I'm very sorry to hear that had to happen, sweetheart. I agree with Agumon above me here, sometimes just being there is the best you can do. I hope your sister makes a speedy recovery from this.

I really am Sorry for your loss, there isn't much I can say to help you feel better about it.

what you should do is just support your sister, say your sorry for her loss and be supportive giving her a shoulder to cry on sometimes in these things being silent is just as good as talking about it.

accualy, in my beliefe, we look forward to funerals. we think it ends their suffering.

I'm not really sure what to tell ya on this... I do have some idea of what she's going through though. See, my mother was pregnant four times in her life, and I'm an only child. Three miscarriages and me.

Really the only thing you can do is just be there for your sister and let her know that you'll always be there when she needs you.

Agumonofalchemy has already given the best advice I can give. I'm really not sure what to say myself, honestly. I'm very sorry for your loss, and I hope everything goes as well as it can from this point on. *hugs*

A grand parent who has lived a long and happy life, who then dies will always be alive in your heart. But a baby who never got so much as a chance is a very different matter. I may suggest that you'll need to keep your sister company and find some activites you two can do together so she can try to partially forget her troubles, but avoid any talk on the topic to prevent any stress buildup. If she gets too stressed at times, give her time to clear her head. Also allow her to make a choice if she ever feel regains confidence to bear another child. My deepest sympathies.

its not entirely the same, but, I guess thanks to the veil of the internet, I can share a little.

My First year of college, my best friend at the time(who at the time was extremely extremely right-wing christian) started to get scared that because of my reckless behavior and the fact that i was gay, i was going to die the next day and end up in hell, every day. She convinced me to just try things out, as far as not being gay. I tried certain things, and the worst possible outcome happened, she got pregnant. we decided I was just going to be gay, and that was that, that having sex wasn't going to change that. She didn't tell me, at all, about the pregnancy until a year later when it was time to pay tuition for our third semester, and she was short a little over 2k. We kept eachother's spending in check, and i knew she should have had just enough. A long drawn out godawful argument later, she said she aborted it for "health risks" along with the fact that she didn't want the baby to grown up without a father, or in a nontraditional household.

That was crushing for me. The baby never made it as far as birth, but for me it was an absolute death. And, yes, I know its different carrying vs. receiving, trust me, i'm not saying i'm equal here, only empathizing. But, i was in consolable, rage-driven, rejective, every long list of adjective's a young welsh guy shouldn't be. Thankfully I didn't do anything i regretted, but, it was my first time dealing with personal loss. The only thing that really got me through it was a constant reinforcement of a "count your blessings" type thing. I had friend's who constantly showed me everything that was still there and still ahead. I guess my long winded reply is saying that the thing that got me through it was someone helping me look ahead, not at what wasn't in my lap. If you want to help, get her looking forward to the future.

2 of my friends at work hade pass by this stage, losing baby near term or just after, i guess my advice is simple, lissen and do not say you understand, in this kind of event people do not wish people to banalise, and try to be positive and suporting, i guess you have to try to ajust your self to the situation, but from my experience people need to exprim them self but not ony about what happen...

My sympatie to you famely

*quiet hugs*

I am sorry for your family's loss, especially for him just being born. I don't have any experience with anything like this. I hope the best for you while you are away, Sammy. May God be with you and your family.

Sorry about the loss, the best one can do in times like these is support, especially if one is the older sibling since younger siblings tend to look up to the older ones for advice and support. Hugs work, telling the person you will be there when they need help. Unfortunately I haven't had this experience and I can't think of anything, try using internet help to search for answers to help your family member, SORRY I can't think of anything more =(. my deep condolences to your family, God will always be there for you and your family. Deeply sorry about the lost.

My condolences. Sometimes listening is the best thing to do. It's not always about saying anything, just so she knows she has someone that will listen and love her helps. *hugs to you and your family*

Happ happ haves no simbilar experiences, and I'm prolly even more socially awkward than sweet squiggle. ;3

But I think don't worry about putting too much pressure on yourslef. While it's ace if you can be helpful, neither is it your obligation to relieve everyone's tension. If you can give her a hug, if you can listen and just be patient and be present, then you're already way ahead of the curve and I know it will mean a ton.

Just don't let your self image get tied up in whether or not you can solve everything. Everyone here loveses you just the way you are, and I'm sure they do up there as well, just with more amazing accents. ;D

After my first nephew was born, my sister had several miscarriages. The environment she was living at was too hostile. After she moved out to a new location, she had my youngest nephew and niece. Of course, my heart goes out for those that didn't make it...

Your sister needs lots of love and encouragement. Be with her, if you can. If you can't, call her on the phone and tell her that you love her.

That's all I can really say....