The year is 1991, and I’m handed a book.

I'm well into my freshman year in high school, and my mom knocks on my door and says ‘You should read this.’ That's all she says, that's all she needs to say.

When I was 10, I picked up a novel from her bookcase, and read it cover to cover in under 3 days. It was a 500 page behemoth called ‘Rama II’ by Arthur C Clark. I was a bit of a child prodigy in those days, able to digest a book like that in a short time with 100% comprehension, ‘College Reading Level’ they called it. My mother was heavy into Science Fiction stories, and so she had no trouble fostering my interest.

By the time I was 14, I had packed away over 1,000 books. I had honestly lost count by then and was easily reading 2-3 books at a time. However, this book was different. It was a white cover, with a silhouette of a dinosaur skeleton. How could dinosaurs be Science Fiction? The pause was only for a moment as I opened the book and dived right in.

12 hours later, I put it down, utterly bewildered. I’m quite sure it was 4-5am. Jurassic Park wasn't just Science Fiction, it was Science Plausible! I even went back to specific passages and read them over. Something I never did. Up to this point, most of the books that I had read were of the type that while quite interesting, were so far from the realm of possibility that a lot of ‘technological magic’ needed to happen for it to be a reality. But this, this wonderful book, every iota of it had a definite air of ‘this could really happen…’

I come from a long line of engineers, My grandfather was with Bell Labs for almost 45 years, my father has been with some massive engineering and computer firms his entire life. With that kind of legacy, it wasn't hard to see what kind of career I might take, but this book helped spearhead that interest even further. I wasn't so interested in the Dinosaurs, that was an ancillary effect, a result of the massive undertaking of science, technology, and engineering that allowed the story to take shape. That's what I wanted to be involved in, that’s what I wanted to do. Don’t get me wrong, the dinosaurs were fun as well, but they were icing on the cake.

Then, in 1993, the movie was announced. I was beside myself and I can say with authority that every single aspect was a treat to watch. While it's difficult to convert a book into a movie, in this case it was done with respect to the scope of the book, while being awe inspiriting and hugely entertaining.

So, it's with no surprise that I started fabricating my own props from the movie (Hey, I was 17, and living with a single mother. What else was I going to do?) Back in the days before readily accessible home computers or color printers I handmade ‘hero props.’ The kind of items that have to stand up to close camera scrutiny. ID badges, engineering blueprints, countless pages of notes and drawings detailing systems and infrastructure, even the little tags that hung from the rear view mirrors of the Explorer tour cars. I saved up to buy the soundtrack on CD, and listened to it constantly. That CD started my lifelong obsession with listening to orchestral scores. I was hooked. And for a good year I was heavily involved in digesting anything JP I could get my hands on.

Now, fast forward 22 years. A lot has happened in that time. I'm just as involved in engineering as I always envisioned I would be. And, it was with some delight that I learned the Jurassic Park would be revisited with a new movie.

For the record, despite reviews I thought the 2nd and 3rd movies were acceptable. Perhaps not with the same grandeur or flair that the first had, but still largely enjoyable.

So, with all that in mind, I wanted to give some thoughts about JURASSIC WORLD.

First, it's my policy now to never watch trailers if I can help it. This predilection for having things spoon fed to the masses, has really put me off. Most movie trailers pretty much give every plot point away, so people can be coddled and eased into it, because god forbid they're exposed to anything they might not like. Gotta make sure I'll like what I'm about to do, before I do it… Which of course removes any possibly of being genuinely surprised. Sure, you could be disappointed, But this is what life should be about, genuine discovery.

Ok, mini-gripe over. Point being I specifically refused to watch the trailer. I wanted to see this with fresh eyes.

I'm sad to say, this movie was a huge disappointment.

From the dinosaur angle, I'm ambivalent. Sure, they looked good and their role in the movie was acceptable, but that's not my avenue of expertise. I want to tackle this from the engineering/technology standpoint, of which I have a significant standing in now.

First, what was ringing in my ears the entire time I was watching was this: Did they learn nothing from the first time? They made all the same mistakes with a fresh new take.

To start: They liked to throw the phrase ‘Spared no Expense’ around as a nod to the first movie, which was great. Except they clearly did not do this. The staff was deplorable. Easily distracted, comedic knockoffs that wouldn’t know ‘professionalism’ if it hit them in the face. The control room should have had an air of NASA ground control, because like a space mission, if something goes catastrophically wrong, people start dying, and quickly. (I’m also looking at YOU orb ball ride handler kid…) Honestly, how could one even be allowed into that park and not be highly trained in not only your job, and emergency procedures, but actually old enough to take it seriously?

Then, along the ‘spared no expense’ route, only one helicopter… with one pilot? NO NO NO. A park that size, with that many people would have a FLEET of helicopters, 1 on hot standby and 1 on warm standby at all times, with 2 parked in a hanger. 6 or more pilots and crews on rotating shifts. Not the bloody check writer of the entire enterprise doing his 3rd, (or was it 4th?) flight ever with a GOD DAMN CREWED MINIGUN. Those things put out a significant amount of recoil, and only a highly experienced pilot would know how to counter for it.

Then, there's the level of technologies displayed throughout the movie.

What was so compelling about the original JP franchise was that the technology was on par with what we had at the time, reaching into the fringes, and taking it to its logical conclusion. Cray MXP's, gene sequencers, electric vehicles, ect, ect. We were wowed and marveled at what was possible.

Jurassic world on the other hand, had almost none of that.

To detail: The VIP wrist bracelets, had no bio monitoring, no GPS tracking, no wearable computer... Nothing other than a tell to the ride handlers to ‘let me go first’ - Lame.

There were no UAV's or drones, at all, yet there were several instances where their inclusion would have been a massive asset. – Super Lame.

No 3D printing or construction of any kind, yet this is now a thing. They're 3D printing entire bridges, and organs. – Ultra Lame.

Now, how about a little conjecture as to what technologies should have been involved? Unlike the first JP, where there were no flying dinosaurs, this iteration boasted all kinds of ‘instadeath from above’ critters that totally warranted some kind of protection system. The Phalanx CIWS system has been around since the 80's. Why were a few independently powered and crewed systems not on the edges of the population centers? Out of sight, but ready to be called upon should something bad happen?

When you ‘spare no expense’ this kind of planning and infrastructure should be a given.

This brings to mind the entire Pteranodon/Dimorphodon attack.

Have you ever boarded an airplane and before the flight, heard the following: “In the event of anything going wrong, run around the cabin and scream at the top of your lungs.” No, you never have, and you never will. Because airlines and the people that crew them are highly professional, and there are established procedures in place to keep you safe should there be an emergency.

The same should have followed suit for Jurassic World. There would be LOTS of documentation, briefings and signs keeping the vacation-goers apprised of what to do in the event of an emergency, or other problem. In that scene, every single one of those people should have been inside their hotel rooms, which at a minimum would have kept them largely out of harms way. And if they weren't? The highly trained and knowledgeable staff should have helped them to a safe area. Even if the park was trying to downplay the emergency, leaving everyone to simply mill about outside was gross neglect edging on criminal.

Stupid tech:
I’ve heard from a few people ‘Oh man those gyrospheres! SO COOL.’ I’ve noticed this trend in movies and entertainment lately to simply do something because it looks cool, but to throw logic right out the window. If you were in a perfectly glass smooth sphere, and put a motive force in it, onboard motors and such, and tried to make it go up a hill, what do you think would happen?

You would not only spin in place, but quite likely would start to go down hill. Why? Because of this pesky thing called friction. Seems off road enthusiasts figured it out a long time back, that if you want to go trail blazing, you’re going to need traction. Which means having big knobby tires on your vehicle.

The same property that allows a person to see outside of these optically perfect spheres, would make them wholly unsuitable for any kind of off-road transportation. Unless it was a perfectly flat, grassy field, like… a golf course. But don't try to do any quick maneuvers, the sphere would simply slide along until enough friction took place to actually effect change.

Lastly, the Jeeps:
Yes, I really did smile and had that nostalgic moment when they stumbled upon the original visitors center… until one of the brothers turned on the NVG's. The best commercial technology at the time, would have been NI-CAD batteries, and those wouldn’t have lasted more than 6 months. (I'm discounting any kind of NASA tech here, because anything that would have lasted that long, would have been overly hazardous to any biologics, and therefore unsuitable for a pair of head worn NVG's)
Then, there was the jeeps themselves. Great to see them, but drivable, after 20+ years exposed to the jungle? No. This is the same problem with just about any movie where a character encounters a derelict vehicle. The tires are always sound, and inflated, and if there’s gas in the tank, it's still just as good as the day it was pumped from the station.

The truth is far worse I'm afraid. I could go into the details, but for simplicity's sake, I'll say that after about 6 months in a vehicles tank, gas gets progressively worse to the point it won't even start the vehicle. And tires loose pressure over time, no matter how good they are. They also experience dry rot, and interestingly enough, the wetter the environment, the worse this happens. Those jeeps would have been sitting on their rims, the seats almost gone (they were leather) with a fuel system completely full of sludge.

End of the day, was the movie entertaining? Yes, a little, but I say this with reservation. It was dumbed down, wizzbang, lowest common denominator entertainment where one didn't have to flex their gray matter at all. Just sit and keep your eyes open, and remember to breathe occasionally. To me, this movie was a hack, an insult to the original and yet another in a series of movies that are riding on the success of their predecessors but in a large print, easily digested, 5th grade reading level version so as to soak up as much money as possible from the largest demographic. (That’s right STAR TREK/JJ ABRAMS, I'M LOOKING AT YOU.)

So, that's my take. I felt compelled to write this up, because I was so invested in the JP world when I was younger. It was the very first thing I felt I was a ‘die hard fan’ over.

Now, with all that in mind, I would like to recommend you all read ‘The Martian’ by Andy Weir. It’s in that same category of Science Plausible, and was a fantastic read. It's been made into a movie and comes out later this year. Fingers crossed, they don’t screw this up. Some last advice: Don't watch the trailer, just go to the movie when it comes out and let it wash over you, good or bad, the first time. :}