So, about my absence throughout September to November.. It was all a tragic journey that led to the loss of someone dear to me. If this hits close to home, I don't recommend reading this journal.

So let's say my mother had a serious drinking problem, like, really bad. If I talked about it in detail, that would change the tone of this story drastically. It was only a matter of time before she killed her liver, which caused the following avalanche of problems.
Mom was starting to lose mobility as her legs inflated, blood cells were leaking, the pain would never stop, she needed me and my sister to start nursing her at home as she refused to go to the hospital.
Around late August or early September, my grandma had finally convinced her to go. Never would I have thought that would be my last goodbye to mom besides a video message she sent to my phone days later. This meant my sister and I had to handle things at home for a while.

So the first couple days mom spent in the hospital were fine, or would have been fine if she wasn't so.. uncooperative. She was always stubborn and preferred to handle things herself, at some point, she got up on her own, lost balance and fell on her head. The impact was so severe that they decided to do surgery on her brain, this was where mistakes were made and where the incompetence of the doctors began to shine through.
Through the proof of photos and everything grandma told us about, there were gaping holes left on my mom's head because they were too rough with the surgery, too many anesthetic drugs were used on her, even in times where it wasn't needed, something they were SUED for before, which was another red flag. There were multiple times that my grandma had to do procedures they didn't bother with, such as change my mom's bandages, move her body into proper positions and clean the tools used on her.
Many infected wounds were left on my poor mother, she was unable to even talk or open her eyes when my sister and I visited her for the first time in a while, which was the last time we saw her just.. barely alive. It was later that we learned the doctors and nurses in charge of her treatment were students, and it shows.

Fast forward to October, where my mother's suffering would finally end. Everyone else was hyped about halloween while I'm here, living through a scary story, as I went to my mother's funeral and had no one to even talk to besides short-lived visits from other family members. Oh yeah, you thought my mother's twisted, ironic death at the hands of an hospital was the only bad thing that happened? Not in the slightest.
While she was gone, problems that she'd insist on taking care of, like paying bills would come back to bite us. My absence was due to me having no Wi-Fi, like I stated before. But I couldn't enjoy myself even offline, as my laptop's system mysteriously corrupted and I couldn't even get past the boot screen without a BSOD occuring, all of this only happened in a span of couple days. While my grandpa helped by paying the internet bill when October started, our ISP had technical issues so my sister and I had to spend ANOTHER month without internet, followed not long after by us having to see our mother get buried.
Y'know, when my sister and I were cleaning the house and found a slug on the sink, something that I've never witnessed before, I offhandedly commented "We sure have a lot of stories to tell mom when she comes back, huh?". I never regretted saying something this badly until now. I torture myself thinking about that everytime now, this is truly an experience I wasn't prepared for. But on the bright side, it made me realize I never should take anything in life for granted. The loss will only hit harder that way.
So this is where my life is now, I wish I could just start working and carry on my mother's hardworking legacy since I know I'm capable, but I don't have the reservist document to do so. The only help I can get is from those who enjoy my art enough to pay and see more.
So please, from the bottom of my heart, support me so that I can take care of myself and the remaining family I have. I won't let any of you down.
Thank you for listening.