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4 years ago
So where to start, The past few months have been pretty difficult for me.
I'll start with this, I learnt that I may have Bipolar Disorder which means my moods can just suddenly flip, Like I could go from happy or just perfectly fine To extremely sad or extremely hyper active. I learnt I might have this due to the fact that some days I'll be happy, just getting on with things and going around doing things and just over all I will be perfectly fine and suddenly out of nowhere I am just hit with a wave of sadness and I lose all hope in everything and just become miserable. Some days I have episodes where it lasts for 2 days straight, The worst I had was a whole week of just depression. But Also the inverse is true too, Like 3 weeks ago, I uploaded a bunch of stuff and i was flying through things I wanted to do since I was in a manic episode, Those tend to only last for the day sadly but anyone who knows me will know My moods could switch extremely quickly for any reason and I think the reason I have bipolar is because for most of my life I've just been miserable, Don't remember the first few years of my life up till I was 6 and through out all of my school years I was bullied intensely and currently I'm remembering all of the people I used to call "friends" and regretting it, I wont go into further detail about that since its still a sore spot and then up to now where I'm struggling to get any form of identification. Anyway enough of that.
And now I'm going to explain why I STILL can't open commissions ... 8 months later. The reason I still can't open Commissions is because DVLA took 3 months to get back to me originally and they told me I didn't provide adequate ID So i couldn't get my provisional Drivers license. (The only reason I haven't got any form of ID, Despite the fact that im fucking 21 is because my parents, since they basically forget me and they wont help me "Because I'm a grown adult they can't do everything for me" despite ALL my accounts being locked and with no physical way of getting ID) So after they responded I sent my birth certificate and had to wait another 4 months because they're lazy pricks and after that 4 months they STILL didn't give me my ID because "It's not enough ID" So I'm currently Fucked, I can't buy ID to unlock my account and I can't Use the money to buy an ID since it's Locked. So what I have thought to do is just quickly create a quick alternate paypal account and try to buy a Passport with it, Since all i'll need for that is my birth certificate.
Thanks for reading my Long ass journal, I just thought I should update you all on the situation since it's been pretty fucking rough, If you have any Suggestions of how to unfuck this situation please tell me.
Thank you all for being here for me and I hope you're enjoying the latest works I've been posting.
-Megacheese-
I'll start with this, I learnt that I may have Bipolar Disorder which means my moods can just suddenly flip, Like I could go from happy or just perfectly fine To extremely sad or extremely hyper active. I learnt I might have this due to the fact that some days I'll be happy, just getting on with things and going around doing things and just over all I will be perfectly fine and suddenly out of nowhere I am just hit with a wave of sadness and I lose all hope in everything and just become miserable. Some days I have episodes where it lasts for 2 days straight, The worst I had was a whole week of just depression. But Also the inverse is true too, Like 3 weeks ago, I uploaded a bunch of stuff and i was flying through things I wanted to do since I was in a manic episode, Those tend to only last for the day sadly but anyone who knows me will know My moods could switch extremely quickly for any reason and I think the reason I have bipolar is because for most of my life I've just been miserable, Don't remember the first few years of my life up till I was 6 and through out all of my school years I was bullied intensely and currently I'm remembering all of the people I used to call "friends" and regretting it, I wont go into further detail about that since its still a sore spot and then up to now where I'm struggling to get any form of identification. Anyway enough of that.
And now I'm going to explain why I STILL can't open commissions ... 8 months later. The reason I still can't open Commissions is because DVLA took 3 months to get back to me originally and they told me I didn't provide adequate ID So i couldn't get my provisional Drivers license. (The only reason I haven't got any form of ID, Despite the fact that im fucking 21 is because my parents, since they basically forget me and they wont help me "Because I'm a grown adult they can't do everything for me" despite ALL my accounts being locked and with no physical way of getting ID) So after they responded I sent my birth certificate and had to wait another 4 months because they're lazy pricks and after that 4 months they STILL didn't give me my ID because "It's not enough ID" So I'm currently Fucked, I can't buy ID to unlock my account and I can't Use the money to buy an ID since it's Locked. So what I have thought to do is just quickly create a quick alternate paypal account and try to buy a Passport with it, Since all i'll need for that is my birth certificate.
Thanks for reading my Long ass journal, I just thought I should update you all on the situation since it's been pretty fucking rough, If you have any Suggestions of how to unfuck this situation please tell me.
Thank you all for being here for me and I hope you're enjoying the latest works I've been posting.
-Megacheese-
I am very familiar with bipolar disorder I may not be some sort of medical expert or a doctor or anything of that sort but I have lived with a family member all my life who has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Where their privacy I will not say who it is nor will I say their name or even say their gender.
But this sad family member goes through mood swings very rapidly and one day they absolutely love life and are a very religious person the next day they can be the most awful person and have the shortest temper over the smallest most inconvenient unimportant things. I'm not going to go into too much detail but there is a multitude of reasons as to why I'm trying my hardest to move out of the house and just start a new life away from my family and dad said family member is part of the reason. The problem is that they understand their condition but they don't love themselves enough to want to be able to change themselves for the better instead they just want to keep doing drugs and drinking themselves until they're absolutely drunk every time they have a day off.
I just want to let you know from experience that you should never listen to any of these stupid articles online that talk about bipolar disorder because a lot of them don't know what they're talking about. My family member is in such a horrible position because they chose to live a self-destructive lifestyle and they don't care about the others around them.
But let me tell you this modern-day medicine has really improved over the years and bipolar disorder is no exception there are treatments and medications that can be done to help minimize your condition to where you can be in control of it and most importantly be in control of your own life. In the short amount of time that I have gotten to know you online you truly do seem like a compassionate genuine individual and that's a rare type of characteristic for People You Meet online these days. You are a good person and I know you are going to take this seriously and act accordingly like a reasonable adult because unlike my family member I know that you really think deeply about things and are a very considerate person. It's understandable if you feel scared or worried about the upcoming future but just know that things are going to get better and I know you're going to be okay I don't mean to sound like a commercial here but just be sure to talk with your doctor and they can get you started on a medical plan to get you the help you need and improve your life for the better.
But for now just take it slow and focus on adjusting to your current situation take all the time you need to and just focus on yourself it's perfectly okay. This is important and no matter what your own personal well-being and health always come first.
I have faith in you buddy and I know in my heart and soul that you're going to be okay. I have nothing but respect for you for wanting to be open about this that's something that is very difficult to talk about and I respect you a lot for doing so regardless you are a stronger person than most! Once again I have faith in your body and I know you're going to beat this!
Have a great day stay safe and I hope you have a very happy and lovely holiday. 💗🎄