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a short message
4 years ago
found this comment on youtube that really accurately describes what i go through in social situations..
"My problem with reaching out is I get socially exhausted extremely quickly. If I reach out, I likely won't have much steam to hold a conversation for long, but I feel obliged to be the one to keep it going. That combined with friends that reach out to me first, I'm left with completely no meter left, even if I enjoyed the time talking. It physically exhausts me too.
So when they want to talk like that every day, I'm completely burn out whether I start convos or not. It's not a lack of interest, it's my brain being unable to form words in that tired state. Even if they're understanding of that, it's hard for me not to sound like a weird selective asshole"
ive recently had some encounters with people i havent spoke to in a long time and while i thought everything was ok, they seemed disappointed in me or like i didnt care because i didnt reach out to them. im not good at keeping in touch with people or talking to people every day. especially with ADHD, when im in the middle of something like watching a video or playing a game i get so focused on what im doing that messages that go across my screen or notification sounds go completely unnoticed.
i dont know why im even typing all this, but i guess i just want people who still talk to me and try and get in contact with me to understand that if i dont respond its not because of anything against you. ive been trying to limit my social circles so im not as exhausted all the time and always anxious that i dont talk to people enough. and i feel bad for doing that and just not responding to a lot of people i struggled to talk with, but its honestly been a lot healthier for me.
even my closest friends i usually dont talk to every day, and im so grateful for them being understanding of that and knowing that it isnt because of a lack of concern or uncaring. i just get so anxious when i feel like i need to contact someone every day out of fear that theyll be annoyed or sad yknow? and it just feels forced from me and i cant even hold a proper conversation. but anyway this has been going on a while so ill shut up, but if you read this much thank you. im sorry and i hope people who have me on discord etc. will understand.
"My problem with reaching out is I get socially exhausted extremely quickly. If I reach out, I likely won't have much steam to hold a conversation for long, but I feel obliged to be the one to keep it going. That combined with friends that reach out to me first, I'm left with completely no meter left, even if I enjoyed the time talking. It physically exhausts me too.
So when they want to talk like that every day, I'm completely burn out whether I start convos or not. It's not a lack of interest, it's my brain being unable to form words in that tired state. Even if they're understanding of that, it's hard for me not to sound like a weird selective asshole"
ive recently had some encounters with people i havent spoke to in a long time and while i thought everything was ok, they seemed disappointed in me or like i didnt care because i didnt reach out to them. im not good at keeping in touch with people or talking to people every day. especially with ADHD, when im in the middle of something like watching a video or playing a game i get so focused on what im doing that messages that go across my screen or notification sounds go completely unnoticed.
i dont know why im even typing all this, but i guess i just want people who still talk to me and try and get in contact with me to understand that if i dont respond its not because of anything against you. ive been trying to limit my social circles so im not as exhausted all the time and always anxious that i dont talk to people enough. and i feel bad for doing that and just not responding to a lot of people i struggled to talk with, but its honestly been a lot healthier for me.
even my closest friends i usually dont talk to every day, and im so grateful for them being understanding of that and knowing that it isnt because of a lack of concern or uncaring. i just get so anxious when i feel like i need to contact someone every day out of fear that theyll be annoyed or sad yknow? and it just feels forced from me and i cant even hold a proper conversation. but anyway this has been going on a while so ill shut up, but if you read this much thank you. im sorry and i hope people who have me on discord etc. will understand.
To simply put it, don't worry. Do interact whenever you feel like it. And we always will be there.