One of my dogs just died, my dad is getting worse and chemo is only buying him time and now I have developed worse chronic back issues that hit me again with screaming pain and I may need to go to the ER. Nothing is going right. I feel like I've lost touch with my closest friends, lost opportunities, I have to try harder than I should just to be happy, and it is never enough. I'm falling apart and can't put myself back together.