Alright so, this is a bit of a special subject I feel.

In the last 3-5 days I've had such a big disinterest in drawing like I've never felt before. Like nothing but really strong "Ugh"s whenever I sat down
to even think of something. I thought about some macro/micro/vore stuff I usually enjoy doodling and was so... unbelievably done with that, can't
really put it into words properly.
Now here's the thing, last month I've had a really great time with Schwarzpelz and put a lot of work into the new pages and I'd actually like to
continue that, get the chapter finished and start a new one, no problem. BUT I'm also doing my weekly patreon posts, which I was hoping to put
out a bit more of this month cause your support has been amazing for such a long time now and I wanted to thank you with some more doodles,
but I've run so dry that I wonder if I can even put out the bare minimum anymore.
So basically, I usually always have some amount of little doodles lying around that I decide to spend a bit more time with and then put em on patreon,
aaalways. But after all the work on Schwarzpelz AND the reward sketch tiers, I've not had time for little doodles anymore, so the little bonus pics for
patreon, they just don't exist right now, my sketch folder is nonexistant at this point.

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How did we get here?
Last year was absolutely sublime, had the perfect balance between my own doodles, some commissions, some Schwarzpelz, just the right amount of
work and time to dedicate to my own pieces so that I was still able to view drawing as the hobby it started out as while also being proud of the quality
and quantity of the pictures I doodled.

This year's dilemma started on the 1st of January. Forgive me if I don't go into great detail, but during a family get-together, which we always do on the
first of each year, I found out that if my parents were to ever pass away (they're like close to 70 at this point), I'd basically be homeless cause I wouldn't
have the money to pay out my older sister and brother if I wanted to keep the place I moved into, which is my late grandma's, just one story beneath (still same house).
Tldr, gotta divide the heritage by 3, means I'd keep the place but have to pay out two thirds of its value to my siblings, which is in the lower six figures.
I went through all 5 stages of grief on that day. Wanted to start the year great, just like the last ended and was hit with the news that at any point in the
maybe near future I might just be literally homeless. The panic attack I had that night dwarfed anything I felt back in the day when I was still on medication
from my depressions. Cause, throughout the day, I really tried to do the math on it, like maybe I could sell a few more commissions, gather a few more people
on patreon and then I'd make that kind of money one day, but no matter what numbers I dreamt of, they wouldn't amount to the sum I'd need to pay off my siblings
even in 10 years from now. It was really like.. reality just crashed in that night.

So, luckily, I have a sister I do not deserve at all. She pulled some strings and by now ( since roughly 2 weeks ), it's actually official that, even after my parents deaths, I'm fully, officially,
allowed to keep living in this house no matter what, in exchange for my hereditary rights. So, that is luckily not something I will have to worry about again.

This is basically the backstory to why I even added the new patreon tiers in January, I panicked, wanted to tell myself it's ok, look, people are interested, numbers are
going up already, I can surely shoulder some extra workload for some time, it's gonna be ok. It's also why I blasted through the 10 commission slots in January in only
2 weeks, needed to prove to myself that I can handle the work. Unfortunately, by now, I can in fact not do it anymore, it's become too much. A few days ago I decided
to unpublish the extra tiers again, though a few sketches from pledges in March are still carrying over to April. Gonna doodle those in hopefully fine quality and then
step on the brakes, try to find my old pace again. I wanna be happy with my pictures and want you guys to enjoy them too, not having to force them out because
of finances anymore.

Uhm.. think this is all I had to say.
Thanks for reading, and for always allowing me to take my time with these things, even though I'm usually too harsh on myself to actually do that.