Really sorry to hear that, whatever it is I hope you guys manage to solve it so you'll feel better. Id don't know if I could offer help, but I've learned a thing or two during therapy about OCD, BPD and autism, especially aspergers. If you want to I could share something with you?

About the commissions, from what I've seen so far your customers have always been understanding. However, if you feel really bad about it and can afford it maybe offer a refund? I know that sometimes it's difficult to draw for yourself, yet alone for others when mental health isn't that great at the moment. Might have a relieving effect?

i appreciate the offer, I'm also in trauma therapy for all of those things but OCD (since I don't have it, to my knowledge NVJKDF) and i do a good job with self soothing, its just like. not always enough when things from the outside are really bad :( Our family is not really nice and are rlly inconsiderate of our feelings especially regarding our disabilities.

I do not have any money to refund them bc I live off of commission money ;;; unfortunately. Not finishing commissions also puts me in a pretty bad positions ansvfnsjbkg
but rn our mum is using our car so we couldn't even job hunt if we tried to bleh living in the rural south is the worst tbh

Can you cut those family members off? Family can be great if it works out for you but since they're rather inconsiderative it could damage your health even more if they're still around in your life. Although I do understand if it's difficult to do that since you most likely have a past with them, however cutting them off might make them realize how serious this topic actually is and how hurt you are by them

Hm, what if you tried base fill adopts? It's something I do, there are many free to use bases so you save a lot of time since you don't need to do sketching or lineart. If you make an interesting design with a base there's a good chance you'll sell it. Unfortunately there's no gurantee that a design you've made will be sold, but it's a possibility to make money in a quicker way than commissions

I cannot because one of them i live with and I have to live with them haha. The place where I live it is actually impossible to live on your own even if you work a full time job because mortgage and rent is too high and out minimum wage is too low.. its $7.50. We live in the poorest county in our state, moving away is not really an option either, if that tells you how unaffordable the rest of everything is.
We are hoping to go on disability and we are working on putting that together but it takes at least a year and usually two or three to get approved if we do XoX

I could do that! I hadn't thought about it actually, that's a good idea!
I feel bad making things on the side while working on commissions but i don't think anyone would mind if I made commissions the priority hah

Aw man that sucks, I'm sorry about that. Idk if I could help somehow, but if you think I can feel free to tell me!

True, you can do both and adopts usually don't take that much time