Major art block
3 years ago
I really need to remember to post these kinds of updates here. I kinda just flood my Twitter with random shit going on, so I forget to post in other places that aren't so instant.
Basically, because of a cascade of several things, including the second job becoming stressful to me, struggling to get through my commissions leading to stress that they're taking too long and thus leading to them taking longer, money, how chaotic the year has been with several major events chaining each other back-to-back, I've hit a point of complete burnout now. Not on art, just on commissions. I've been struggling to work on commissions for a while now and I've hit a point of just... too much stress.
At the minute I am really struggling.
I'm so sorry this has spiralled so far out of control. I've been trying to keep my head above the water and it's left me just... So burned out. I haven't been able to work on any personal projects in months, I've not touched the comic I've been wanting to do for so long. All while taking on a second job so I could pay off my debts.
I love doing art and I'm not giving it up for the world. Commissions right now are really daunting though. I'm just scared to open them, look at them, I feel exhausted from it and I've just hit a point of burnout where I just need to take a step back for a bit. I want to do some personal projects again, but because of the second job I just don't have the time. The second job itself isn't... Bad. Like, the work is easy enough, I can just go full brain off, stick on some music or audiobook or something and get on with it. But it's not fulfilling, the hours, the starting time of 5am, it's all eating at me.
I just want the freedom of freelancing back too. Friend's birthday next week, I almost wasn't able to go because of my holiday for it (just two days mind) being rejected, but the Sunday is a day I don't work anyway so I guess I just get a train on the Saturday. Similarly, Rise Against are playing in London in November and there's a chance that'll get rejected which I'll be extremely upset about. Fuck.
I'm so fucking sorry. I just wanted control of my life back.
Basically, because of a cascade of several things, including the second job becoming stressful to me, struggling to get through my commissions leading to stress that they're taking too long and thus leading to them taking longer, money, how chaotic the year has been with several major events chaining each other back-to-back, I've hit a point of complete burnout now. Not on art, just on commissions. I've been struggling to work on commissions for a while now and I've hit a point of just... too much stress.
At the minute I am really struggling.
I'm so sorry this has spiralled so far out of control. I've been trying to keep my head above the water and it's left me just... So burned out. I haven't been able to work on any personal projects in months, I've not touched the comic I've been wanting to do for so long. All while taking on a second job so I could pay off my debts.
I love doing art and I'm not giving it up for the world. Commissions right now are really daunting though. I'm just scared to open them, look at them, I feel exhausted from it and I've just hit a point of burnout where I just need to take a step back for a bit. I want to do some personal projects again, but because of the second job I just don't have the time. The second job itself isn't... Bad. Like, the work is easy enough, I can just go full brain off, stick on some music or audiobook or something and get on with it. But it's not fulfilling, the hours, the starting time of 5am, it's all eating at me.
I just want the freedom of freelancing back too. Friend's birthday next week, I almost wasn't able to go because of my holiday for it (just two days mind) being rejected, but the Sunday is a day I don't work anyway so I guess I just get a train on the Saturday. Similarly, Rise Against are playing in London in November and there's a chance that'll get rejected which I'll be extremely upset about. Fuck.
I'm so fucking sorry. I just wanted control of my life back.
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