WARNING! May got some angsty-colored text.

I have thinked alot of stuff.
Everything of my life.

And I'm quite happy about now. I have nice apartment, some good friends, and place where spend days.
Still.. Something is missing. All the time.
Something is ripping my heart to little pieces.
Fuck this shit, again. I should be happy what I got. I should be freaking happy!

...

I don't know what the hell I'm doing with my life. To who I'm living this?
And fuck, how much I afraid of death. I don't wanna die. Never. I don't want that anyone else dies, too. I want all to stay with me forever.
I want all things stay like this..

I have friends, good one's. Still I feel that I can't speak to anyone. I want to speak to just for one, but he does'nt need to listen me anymore.
I just.. don't want to talk to anyone else. If someone comes to ask that are you ok, I'm going behind my scene and just say that everything is ok, I will take care.

I will be ok. Like always..

...

Fuck, how broken I'm again.
And now there is nobody who would stitch me together.