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Back in black
3 years ago
Osiyu everyone, or should I say
"Back in black, I hit the sack
I've been too long, I'm glad to be back"
Except for brief peeks out from the forest green I've been quiet for the past year and change. I assure nothing bad had happen to me, just around Feb of last year I made a major decision to change my life for I knew at my age I couldn't keep going as I was.
Before 2018, I was in college, advancing for my BA in Psychology/Sociology when as many long-term watchers know my mother passed away in 18. What I didn't post is that within eight months six people I cared about also passed too My cousin who was a big-sister to me (and one of the few of the family who knew of my pansexual desires), my mother of course, my real-estate appraising supervisor, (which threw me for a loop), two friends of 20+ years, and another cousin.
2019, the climax of the life crisis had me putting down my closest friend; my lab Thunder due to some sort of cancer. That put me into a deep depression that required professional help. Of ALL the things that happened in 18, Thunder was the most painful act of this hell I went though. It hurt worse than any I lost in 18.
By the end of 19 after scrabbling for work (including going to Tyson for 3 months; bad mistake) I wasn't thinking too clearly. I heard '$16 an hour' and cash bells started going off. I didn't actually see I was doing 10 hour shifts, 6 days a week until 21! It took all that time to catch up as memories started to finally rebuild and come to the surface. I left Tyson finally when I was falling asleep at the wheel coming home -- at 1am. I also was definitely not all 'there' due to the problems with Thunder and not getting enough sleep.
It was actually so bad, that between 18 - 2020, I had almost no memories at all. A supervisor at a restaurant I was in, in early 19 asked my age and I told her what it was in 2018 but she did the math and showed me I lost two years of memories. My therapist said that I was in survival mode and all those have been suppressed, and I should regain them over time (which has proven true.)
By 2020 I'd gained employment at a local Goodwill, and suddenly things started to change for the better. I've grown, healed, and come out of my shell (closet on the other paw is a strict no-no) and grown as a person greatly. Now I'm well thought of from the customers and staff. Won awards(!), learned a lot of new things including how to budget, an intense frugality (far more than my normal Appalachian frugality) and gained good friends. Sadly no one truly special in my life aside from my mother's last and greatest gift; my dog. I wear a shirt at times saying "My rescue dog, rescued me." Although she's not a rescue (mother bought her) she did rescue me. Her intense loyalty, love and happiness kept me sane and now has installed an intense desire to work, and a lust for life. I do it all for her since now she is in essence my daughter (even if she has 4 legs and a tail -- giggle)
Now we come up to the last year. Feb I realized how old I was, and saw no real path for me to achieve my dreams (house, land, and my animal companions.) My dog sort of showed me that, and reminded me of my dream from 2015; the house I was saving and working for was shot when I needed all $22,000 I scrimped and saved for just to survive and help Thunder though his final days. So I started back to work on my original idea; getting my real-estate appraiser's license. But the appraisal board of Kentucky told me I needed to take all new classes. I thought 'four months, bring it on' Boy did I miscalculate that! While in the classes, I had to do my normal stuff as well learn how to actually study. A few wrong paths, and nearly 3 mouths trying to pass USPAP (the law part of Appraisal work) and finally in late August I got though my classes.
Now I just heard from the Appraisal board. They accepted all my class work, I just need a short 7h class to finish. Then get a new supervisor, spend six months with him/her and then fill out lots of paperwork, and some more classes for a total of 150 hours. Pass the state test, and I'll be a fully licensed appraiser.
The beauty of being supervised is #1 all those old appraisals I did with my former supervisor is now null and void; useless. which is ok, we had a small fire in the storage unit that destroyed 2 years worth so I couldn't give those to the board. The appraisals I do for the new supervisor will be the ones I have to turn into the board. This time I know what path to take with these.
#2 I get paid for each and every appraisal I do! It's only half since my super has to go with me for each appraisal, go over the results but that's fine. That along with Goodwill's pay means I'll start to make money enough to replace my old and aging car (it's a 09 Rav 4) and be on my way to my house again.
And this time, I'll make it. I never thought it'd take this long but it's taken this long to recover from the life crisis and get going. I'm pushing myself to get the house at least to the point of actually buying it by Sep 1 -- my birthday.
I'm now very clear of my path, precisely what I need to do each step of the way, so...
2023 is my year!
I almost forgot; in the year and change you all posted things on FA. I assure you I remember some including to two people. I accidentally erased all comments (That damned 'nuke' is a royal pain under the tail) I'll be in touch ASAP.
Also writing; Yes I never actually 'stopped' but in the intervening year I got together with two other authors and now I actually learned how to get around this ADHD problem I have with writing and now stuff is coming including my new 'Shadowing the Dream' novel. This goes within a collection of 'dream' stories that we're pushing for a December publishing of the first book!
Ok, I got to run, It's nearly time for work so see you all soon.
"Back in black, I hit the sack
I've been too long, I'm glad to be back"
Except for brief peeks out from the forest green I've been quiet for the past year and change. I assure nothing bad had happen to me, just around Feb of last year I made a major decision to change my life for I knew at my age I couldn't keep going as I was.
Before 2018, I was in college, advancing for my BA in Psychology/Sociology when as many long-term watchers know my mother passed away in 18. What I didn't post is that within eight months six people I cared about also passed too My cousin who was a big-sister to me (and one of the few of the family who knew of my pansexual desires), my mother of course, my real-estate appraising supervisor, (which threw me for a loop), two friends of 20+ years, and another cousin.
2019, the climax of the life crisis had me putting down my closest friend; my lab Thunder due to some sort of cancer. That put me into a deep depression that required professional help. Of ALL the things that happened in 18, Thunder was the most painful act of this hell I went though. It hurt worse than any I lost in 18.
By the end of 19 after scrabbling for work (including going to Tyson for 3 months; bad mistake) I wasn't thinking too clearly. I heard '$16 an hour' and cash bells started going off. I didn't actually see I was doing 10 hour shifts, 6 days a week until 21! It took all that time to catch up as memories started to finally rebuild and come to the surface. I left Tyson finally when I was falling asleep at the wheel coming home -- at 1am. I also was definitely not all 'there' due to the problems with Thunder and not getting enough sleep.
It was actually so bad, that between 18 - 2020, I had almost no memories at all. A supervisor at a restaurant I was in, in early 19 asked my age and I told her what it was in 2018 but she did the math and showed me I lost two years of memories. My therapist said that I was in survival mode and all those have been suppressed, and I should regain them over time (which has proven true.)
By 2020 I'd gained employment at a local Goodwill, and suddenly things started to change for the better. I've grown, healed, and come out of my shell (closet on the other paw is a strict no-no) and grown as a person greatly. Now I'm well thought of from the customers and staff. Won awards(!), learned a lot of new things including how to budget, an intense frugality (far more than my normal Appalachian frugality) and gained good friends. Sadly no one truly special in my life aside from my mother's last and greatest gift; my dog. I wear a shirt at times saying "My rescue dog, rescued me." Although she's not a rescue (mother bought her) she did rescue me. Her intense loyalty, love and happiness kept me sane and now has installed an intense desire to work, and a lust for life. I do it all for her since now she is in essence my daughter (even if she has 4 legs and a tail -- giggle)
Now we come up to the last year. Feb I realized how old I was, and saw no real path for me to achieve my dreams (house, land, and my animal companions.) My dog sort of showed me that, and reminded me of my dream from 2015; the house I was saving and working for was shot when I needed all $22,000 I scrimped and saved for just to survive and help Thunder though his final days. So I started back to work on my original idea; getting my real-estate appraiser's license. But the appraisal board of Kentucky told me I needed to take all new classes. I thought 'four months, bring it on' Boy did I miscalculate that! While in the classes, I had to do my normal stuff as well learn how to actually study. A few wrong paths, and nearly 3 mouths trying to pass USPAP (the law part of Appraisal work) and finally in late August I got though my classes.
Now I just heard from the Appraisal board. They accepted all my class work, I just need a short 7h class to finish. Then get a new supervisor, spend six months with him/her and then fill out lots of paperwork, and some more classes for a total of 150 hours. Pass the state test, and I'll be a fully licensed appraiser.
The beauty of being supervised is #1 all those old appraisals I did with my former supervisor is now null and void; useless. which is ok, we had a small fire in the storage unit that destroyed 2 years worth so I couldn't give those to the board. The appraisals I do for the new supervisor will be the ones I have to turn into the board. This time I know what path to take with these.
#2 I get paid for each and every appraisal I do! It's only half since my super has to go with me for each appraisal, go over the results but that's fine. That along with Goodwill's pay means I'll start to make money enough to replace my old and aging car (it's a 09 Rav 4) and be on my way to my house again.
And this time, I'll make it. I never thought it'd take this long but it's taken this long to recover from the life crisis and get going. I'm pushing myself to get the house at least to the point of actually buying it by Sep 1 -- my birthday.
I'm now very clear of my path, precisely what I need to do each step of the way, so...
2023 is my year!
I almost forgot; in the year and change you all posted things on FA. I assure you I remember some including to two people. I accidentally erased all comments (That damned 'nuke' is a royal pain under the tail) I'll be in touch ASAP.
Also writing; Yes I never actually 'stopped' but in the intervening year I got together with two other authors and now I actually learned how to get around this ADHD problem I have with writing and now stuff is coming including my new 'Shadowing the Dream' novel. This goes within a collection of 'dream' stories that we're pushing for a December publishing of the first book!
Ok, I got to run, It's nearly time for work so see you all soon.
I think that sums it up.
Bunners
HUGGggz fem.
Yes, I've had jobs where I fell asleep at the wheel -- at 7:30 AM. I was working security 16 x 5. A few years later I was doing 12 x 6. I lost a year-and-a-half or so myself. I spent a lot of time in a fugue state.
And yes, my (second) best friend has four feet fur and fangs, too!
Vix
Good to see you back. I need to catch up reading your material, when I get the chance.