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Its been a while...
3 years ago
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Generic header insertion here to waste space :3<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< Hey, its been some time since I've done anything here. A lot has happened, but the bulk of it was in the past year. I don't know if I'll be able to express everything in this, but I'll try to.
Its been a little over a year since my father passed away, I got the call from the dialysis center that he was in that his heart stopped working and that they were trying to revive him as they were taking him to the hospital. I felt panic just wash over me like a cold shower that was laced in ice, by the time I was able to get ready and head to the hospital I called my brother and told him what was going on. I felt that fine thread that was keeping my mind together about to snap. I was hoping, praying to any one that it was going to be okay, but it was a roller coaster till the very end. They were able to get his heart working again, but it was a whole forty five minutes when his heart stopped, he was in a coma, me and my brother didn't know if he was coming back the same or at all at that point. My brother came down from Orlando to check up on me and our father while he was in the hospital recovering, he had a family that needed him so he couldn't stay for long, so most of the time I would be at the house that me and my dad shared alone, thinking to myself if their was anything that I could of done that would have made this different, was this my fault that he was this way.
Fast forwarding a bit, on a day that me and my brother went to see him, we got a little glimmer of hope, he woke up, he remembered us, but something was different about him. He was still in a half wake and half dazed state, but he was nodding at least to some of the thing that me and my brother were asking him. The doctors wanted to do more tests to figure out the reason why his heart stopped working, they also mentioned that they don't know if he was ever going to be the same after his heart was at a stop for more then forty five minutes, their could be brain damage from the lack of oxygen. My brother, since he was the eldest, gave the no resuscitate order if something were to happen.
It was five in the morning, October seventeenth, the doctors called me about proceeding with the procedure, in a half woke tone I gave them the go ahead and blessed to hope that everything will be fine. In the time while that was happening, I woke up and got my computer to take my mind off things. It was around two in the afternoon when my brother came over, he didn't call me till he was in the drive way and told me to come outside. He told me the doctors called, they found that bacteria was on the back side of his heart eating away at the muscle that cause the heart failure, but he also told me that he passed away after the procedure was completed. My mind turned white, I couldn't think, I couldn't even cry, I just stared blankly at my brother through him and into nothing. My world shattered that day, both my mother and father who I was charged of taking care of both gone one after another, I felt lost.
A month later I moved to Orlando to be with my brother and his family, they took me in after we decided to sell the house, I transferred jobs from my current one while looking for another one. While also looking for an apartment to be in, but wont be for a while till the house sells and could get the money from that to afford one. I thankfully found another job at a school as their school tech, I was happy that I was able to land something that momentous, things were starting to look better. At the beginning of this new job, everything felt new and exciting, but I would soon later find out that it was not everything that it was cracked up to be. I was only one to manage both schools, over fifteen hundred devices from the students and all the devices that the teachers had as well on top of that, I would come home exhausted and mind spent, I was not enjoying this. My leg would ache every day from the other on job injury that I had, I didn't know what to do.
Around that time, the house sold, I was able to find a apartment and I was living on my own for the first time since I left my birth home. I needed a change, one more time, during a meeting with the school heads at both schools I told them I would be stepping down and quitting effective that day. I've explained to them all the things that were happening in my life up to this point, my father passing away, transferring jobs, moving twice, their is only so many life changing events that can happen in a year that the mind can handle at once. They were sympathetic and understood, I needed to mentally take better care of myself, too much has happened in my life, both of the principles had doctors degrees in psychology and I guess could understand on how I was feeling, I was just crying that I just made the most difficult decision of my life to try and better myself.
I turned in my badge, I apologized that I was not able to live up to their expectations, but they said to not worry about it and told me that I hoped that I would get better after I sorted my self, they wished me good luck and I left. Side note, I will not recommend working at a school district, way too much work and not enough pay for the stress that it comes with.
So, here I am today, I'm doing well, had a lot to think on and side projects to work on and came to a conclusion, I want to go back to streaming. I've had a lot of fun doing that, it seems to be the best for me at the moment since I'm physically not able to do a lot, I've also went to MFF for the first time which was a lot of fun. It was a little rocky at first, but I was able to see a lot of people that I hang out with in VRChat. That gave me a lot of new and happy memories that I won't forget anytime soon. If you're reading this, thanks for sticking to the end of this. Also, no matter the hurdles that we face in life, no matter how high that jump is to make it to the next ledge, you can do it, keep trying and you can make that leap.
With love
Danny
Its been a little over a year since my father passed away, I got the call from the dialysis center that he was in that his heart stopped working and that they were trying to revive him as they were taking him to the hospital. I felt panic just wash over me like a cold shower that was laced in ice, by the time I was able to get ready and head to the hospital I called my brother and told him what was going on. I felt that fine thread that was keeping my mind together about to snap. I was hoping, praying to any one that it was going to be okay, but it was a roller coaster till the very end. They were able to get his heart working again, but it was a whole forty five minutes when his heart stopped, he was in a coma, me and my brother didn't know if he was coming back the same or at all at that point. My brother came down from Orlando to check up on me and our father while he was in the hospital recovering, he had a family that needed him so he couldn't stay for long, so most of the time I would be at the house that me and my dad shared alone, thinking to myself if their was anything that I could of done that would have made this different, was this my fault that he was this way.
Fast forwarding a bit, on a day that me and my brother went to see him, we got a little glimmer of hope, he woke up, he remembered us, but something was different about him. He was still in a half wake and half dazed state, but he was nodding at least to some of the thing that me and my brother were asking him. The doctors wanted to do more tests to figure out the reason why his heart stopped working, they also mentioned that they don't know if he was ever going to be the same after his heart was at a stop for more then forty five minutes, their could be brain damage from the lack of oxygen. My brother, since he was the eldest, gave the no resuscitate order if something were to happen.
It was five in the morning, October seventeenth, the doctors called me about proceeding with the procedure, in a half woke tone I gave them the go ahead and blessed to hope that everything will be fine. In the time while that was happening, I woke up and got my computer to take my mind off things. It was around two in the afternoon when my brother came over, he didn't call me till he was in the drive way and told me to come outside. He told me the doctors called, they found that bacteria was on the back side of his heart eating away at the muscle that cause the heart failure, but he also told me that he passed away after the procedure was completed. My mind turned white, I couldn't think, I couldn't even cry, I just stared blankly at my brother through him and into nothing. My world shattered that day, both my mother and father who I was charged of taking care of both gone one after another, I felt lost.
A month later I moved to Orlando to be with my brother and his family, they took me in after we decided to sell the house, I transferred jobs from my current one while looking for another one. While also looking for an apartment to be in, but wont be for a while till the house sells and could get the money from that to afford one. I thankfully found another job at a school as their school tech, I was happy that I was able to land something that momentous, things were starting to look better. At the beginning of this new job, everything felt new and exciting, but I would soon later find out that it was not everything that it was cracked up to be. I was only one to manage both schools, over fifteen hundred devices from the students and all the devices that the teachers had as well on top of that, I would come home exhausted and mind spent, I was not enjoying this. My leg would ache every day from the other on job injury that I had, I didn't know what to do.
Around that time, the house sold, I was able to find a apartment and I was living on my own for the first time since I left my birth home. I needed a change, one more time, during a meeting with the school heads at both schools I told them I would be stepping down and quitting effective that day. I've explained to them all the things that were happening in my life up to this point, my father passing away, transferring jobs, moving twice, their is only so many life changing events that can happen in a year that the mind can handle at once. They were sympathetic and understood, I needed to mentally take better care of myself, too much has happened in my life, both of the principles had doctors degrees in psychology and I guess could understand on how I was feeling, I was just crying that I just made the most difficult decision of my life to try and better myself.
I turned in my badge, I apologized that I was not able to live up to their expectations, but they said to not worry about it and told me that I hoped that I would get better after I sorted my self, they wished me good luck and I left. Side note, I will not recommend working at a school district, way too much work and not enough pay for the stress that it comes with.
So, here I am today, I'm doing well, had a lot to think on and side projects to work on and came to a conclusion, I want to go back to streaming. I've had a lot of fun doing that, it seems to be the best for me at the moment since I'm physically not able to do a lot, I've also went to MFF for the first time which was a lot of fun. It was a little rocky at first, but I was able to see a lot of people that I hang out with in VRChat. That gave me a lot of new and happy memories that I won't forget anytime soon. If you're reading this, thanks for sticking to the end of this. Also, no matter the hurdles that we face in life, no matter how high that jump is to make it to the next ledge, you can do it, keep trying and you can make that leap.
With love
Danny
