FA+
Shop
Goals and Resolutions
2 years ago
Is it too late to be posting one of these new year resolution things? But anyhow, thought I'd just share a bit more about what I've been going through in my head, and my visions for the future. :)
Goals I did accomplish last year:
Did more original content than commission work
Half a year ago, I made the decision to "semi-retire" from taking commissions when I became more financially stable. I didn't do this because I disliked doing commissions, but I didn't want the majority of my gallery to just be a reflection of other's people's visions, which was what it was becoming. Instead, I wanted to build off an audience from a gallery that reflected my identity as an artist. So now I only really take certain commission projects if the idea was something I'd be personally invested in. I kinda did a lookover of what I did in 2022, and I noticed that a little over half of what I made was original stuff, which is great! :D Specifically, I've been really enjoying sharing comics of my OCs and I have plenty more shenanigans planned for the future. A part of me does miss commission work sometimes (I did enjoy seeing people happy when I drew stuff for them) but I don't want to do it the same way I did before. I wanna try to find more ways where I can mix doing what I love doing while also giving people more affordable options to get art from me if they'd like. Something like Nub Club comes to mind haha.
... yeah thats about all I accomplished last year. I'm not really good at these things. xD
This year I only really have three goals:
Going ham into animation
With the advent of AI art BS and more modern platforms becoming video oriented, I've been trying to find ways to adapt my art into the ever changing landscape. So lately I've been trying to work more on my animation skills and illustration has sorta become second priority to me. I still do use my illustration skills to paint backgrounds, get the lighting right in scenes and whatnot, but its longer going to be my main focus. That's not to say I'm gonna just be doing ALL animation from now on (I'd go crazy xD), but its something I want to focus on improving more than my drawing skills, which I feel has sorta reached a "peak" now haha.
I've been happy with my progress in animation so far since they've been doing very well on social media, but I feel like its not enough. Everytime I see animators doing like elaborate fight scenes and stuff, it really gets me inspired haha, but then when I look at my own stuff in comparison, well, it doesn't look bad, but it just looks so... simple? xD Although, I still want to keep my animated YCHs that way just so that they don't consume months of my life lol, but I do want to branch out and do more than just move them slightly, especially since I feel like animating has gotten a bit easier for me to do. I've been shooting more video references and I feel more confident to do more elaborate stuff. Another thing is that I want to do more animations with my original ideas. I sorta did that more this year (with the little goat Sky animations here and there xD) but the majority of my animations are still for others and I kinda want to flip that around.
I also want to try dabbling with Live2D (the program they use to make Vtubers lol). It just seems like another interesting animation program to learn. It probably won't replace the way I animate (still prefer frame by frame) and tbh, I wouldn't really know what else to make with it other than bobbing, talking heads xD But it doesn't seem very complicated program to learn, and its just something I wanted to add to my skillset :>
Start on an animated trailer for my series
This one sort of relates to the goal above, but when I mentioned making more original animations, this is more specifically what I wanted to do. As I've gotten older, I began to have the realization that... wow... I'm gonna die soon (yeah I know im probably overreacting since I'm still in my 20s lol). But I just really want to finish and get something out there before I feel like I run out of steam. Like leaving a legacy I guess. xD I know I still have Bromodachis, but thats more of just a casual fun comic I make sometimes, and I don't really have an end goal for it. But I really want to get The Incubus Prince off the ground since I already have the groundwork for it done, I just need to find the right medium. There is no way in heck I can make the story a comic or a full fledged animation (especially when I'm only doing this on my free time) so I figured that a 1-2 minute animated trailer that hits all the key points in the story would be good enough. This might take a few years to finish, but its something I'm currently really passionate about, so hopefully its feasible. Once the trailer is finished, I'm hoping it could lead to other opportunities down the line, or even if it doesn't, I'd just be happy to see it completed. xD
I often get people asking about the story with Plyso and the other characters surrounding him, and honestly, I really still want to do something with that story in the future. But the problem with it is that right now it has a very convoluted storyline and still needs a lot to be fixed before it can be a thing. The stories with Sky and Keith are just easier and simpler to work with, and I can actually see an end goal with them. I also just feel more passionate with them currently. But as for the other story, it just isn't a good time to invest a lot of resources into it right now. When a good time comes to resurrect it, I'll know, trust me. :')
Defeating this monster known as "Social Anxiety"
This is a thing that's been eating away at me since childhood and is most likely the main source of everything wrong in my life. And I've gotten to the point where I'm just so tired of this thing holding me back from everything and I finally want it gone for good.
Over the years, my severe social anxiety has caused me to lose friendships, potential relationships, career opportunities, and preventing me to move on with my life in general. It's basically the voice in your head that keeps saying "You're not good enough", "they'll hate you" or "you'll regret this". It has isolated me from everyone and in turn, has made more more lonely than I've ever been. At the same time, I've always blamed myself for my loneliness. I'm horrible at keeping up with old friends and people I used to talk to, because my stupid social anxiety keeps doubting my relationships with people. I keep thinking they'll hate me if I say something off or I'll be annoying if I talk too much, or that its too "awkward" to reach out to an old friend I haven't spoken to in years. So I completely understand why they just ghost or dont want to do anything with me anymore, even if I try to rekindle our relationship years later. At this point, I don't even know who is even a friend to me anymore or if I even have any friends left.
So I want to try to get out more and make more connections/friends. Maybe try volunteering and taking on a small non-art related jobs just so I can meet more people irl. Even online, I want to start doing more stuff with people. Maybe start streaming? I haven't played an MMO in years and was thinking of trying out FFXIV. I had an idea of a Viera character based off of this abomination of mine lol. Or maybe some character based off Sky or Keith, I don't know. xD
But I know the social anxiety isn't going to go away that quickly. In fact, its still holding me back right now. So it might take a while till I really fight off this thing for good. Just... be patient with me. :'D
Yeah, thats about all I wanted to get off my chest haha. :')
Goals I did accomplish last year:
Did more original content than commission work
Half a year ago, I made the decision to "semi-retire" from taking commissions when I became more financially stable. I didn't do this because I disliked doing commissions, but I didn't want the majority of my gallery to just be a reflection of other's people's visions, which was what it was becoming. Instead, I wanted to build off an audience from a gallery that reflected my identity as an artist. So now I only really take certain commission projects if the idea was something I'd be personally invested in. I kinda did a lookover of what I did in 2022, and I noticed that a little over half of what I made was original stuff, which is great! :D Specifically, I've been really enjoying sharing comics of my OCs and I have plenty more shenanigans planned for the future. A part of me does miss commission work sometimes (I did enjoy seeing people happy when I drew stuff for them) but I don't want to do it the same way I did before. I wanna try to find more ways where I can mix doing what I love doing while also giving people more affordable options to get art from me if they'd like. Something like Nub Club comes to mind haha.
... yeah thats about all I accomplished last year. I'm not really good at these things. xD
This year I only really have three goals:
Going ham into animation
With the advent of AI art BS and more modern platforms becoming video oriented, I've been trying to find ways to adapt my art into the ever changing landscape. So lately I've been trying to work more on my animation skills and illustration has sorta become second priority to me. I still do use my illustration skills to paint backgrounds, get the lighting right in scenes and whatnot, but its longer going to be my main focus. That's not to say I'm gonna just be doing ALL animation from now on (I'd go crazy xD), but its something I want to focus on improving more than my drawing skills, which I feel has sorta reached a "peak" now haha.
I've been happy with my progress in animation so far since they've been doing very well on social media, but I feel like its not enough. Everytime I see animators doing like elaborate fight scenes and stuff, it really gets me inspired haha, but then when I look at my own stuff in comparison, well, it doesn't look bad, but it just looks so... simple? xD Although, I still want to keep my animated YCHs that way just so that they don't consume months of my life lol, but I do want to branch out and do more than just move them slightly, especially since I feel like animating has gotten a bit easier for me to do. I've been shooting more video references and I feel more confident to do more elaborate stuff. Another thing is that I want to do more animations with my original ideas. I sorta did that more this year (with the little goat Sky animations here and there xD) but the majority of my animations are still for others and I kinda want to flip that around.
I also want to try dabbling with Live2D (the program they use to make Vtubers lol). It just seems like another interesting animation program to learn. It probably won't replace the way I animate (still prefer frame by frame) and tbh, I wouldn't really know what else to make with it other than bobbing, talking heads xD But it doesn't seem very complicated program to learn, and its just something I wanted to add to my skillset :>
Start on an animated trailer for my series
This one sort of relates to the goal above, but when I mentioned making more original animations, this is more specifically what I wanted to do. As I've gotten older, I began to have the realization that... wow... I'm gonna die soon (yeah I know im probably overreacting since I'm still in my 20s lol). But I just really want to finish and get something out there before I feel like I run out of steam. Like leaving a legacy I guess. xD I know I still have Bromodachis, but thats more of just a casual fun comic I make sometimes, and I don't really have an end goal for it. But I really want to get The Incubus Prince off the ground since I already have the groundwork for it done, I just need to find the right medium. There is no way in heck I can make the story a comic or a full fledged animation (especially when I'm only doing this on my free time) so I figured that a 1-2 minute animated trailer that hits all the key points in the story would be good enough. This might take a few years to finish, but its something I'm currently really passionate about, so hopefully its feasible. Once the trailer is finished, I'm hoping it could lead to other opportunities down the line, or even if it doesn't, I'd just be happy to see it completed. xD
I often get people asking about the story with Plyso and the other characters surrounding him, and honestly, I really still want to do something with that story in the future. But the problem with it is that right now it has a very convoluted storyline and still needs a lot to be fixed before it can be a thing. The stories with Sky and Keith are just easier and simpler to work with, and I can actually see an end goal with them. I also just feel more passionate with them currently. But as for the other story, it just isn't a good time to invest a lot of resources into it right now. When a good time comes to resurrect it, I'll know, trust me. :')
Defeating this monster known as "Social Anxiety"
This is a thing that's been eating away at me since childhood and is most likely the main source of everything wrong in my life. And I've gotten to the point where I'm just so tired of this thing holding me back from everything and I finally want it gone for good.
Over the years, my severe social anxiety has caused me to lose friendships, potential relationships, career opportunities, and preventing me to move on with my life in general. It's basically the voice in your head that keeps saying "You're not good enough", "they'll hate you" or "you'll regret this". It has isolated me from everyone and in turn, has made more more lonely than I've ever been. At the same time, I've always blamed myself for my loneliness. I'm horrible at keeping up with old friends and people I used to talk to, because my stupid social anxiety keeps doubting my relationships with people. I keep thinking they'll hate me if I say something off or I'll be annoying if I talk too much, or that its too "awkward" to reach out to an old friend I haven't spoken to in years. So I completely understand why they just ghost or dont want to do anything with me anymore, even if I try to rekindle our relationship years later. At this point, I don't even know who is even a friend to me anymore or if I even have any friends left.
So I want to try to get out more and make more connections/friends. Maybe try volunteering and taking on a small non-art related jobs just so I can meet more people irl. Even online, I want to start doing more stuff with people. Maybe start streaming? I haven't played an MMO in years and was thinking of trying out FFXIV. I had an idea of a Viera character based off of this abomination of mine lol. Or maybe some character based off Sky or Keith, I don't know. xD
But I know the social anxiety isn't going to go away that quickly. In fact, its still holding me back right now. So it might take a while till I really fight off this thing for good. Just... be patient with me. :'D
Yeah, thats about all I wanted to get off my chest haha. :')
Good on you!
For your third goal, defeating social anxiety, I have some suggestions. You are of course free to skip this entire part of the comment. As someone who has been there before, figured I'd share what worked for me. Hope this can help you and anyone else who may be reading this.
So this is what helped me personally overcome my social anxiety. Well...mostly. It's not something that goes away easily and may not go away entirely. I still have to battle with it from time to time. Once you've accepted that it's going to be a tough fight and one that may never truly end, you are ready to start on the path to recovery!
I know it sounds silly but the simplest way to do it is talk to people. I'd suggest starting with old friends you might not have spoken to in sometime. Then start to branch out to new people. A simple, "Hey, hun, how are you? Been a while since we've spoke and I wanted to connect with you again!" Maybe share some things you've been up to and ask what's new with them. If you like to play games, playing together can really help rekindle an old friendship. If you know them IRL, getting food or seeing a movie can be a great way to reconnect!
Sometimes this works, sometimes it doesn't. Unfortunately you have to accept that some friendships are done and over with. Maybe they've changed into someone you don't want to associate with. Maybe you've changed into someone they don't want to associate with. People change and sometimes we stop being compatible. It's not always a bad thing. Just a simple fact of life and growing as individuals.
Meeting new people!! Meeting new people can be scary as hell! QωQ It can however be incredibly rewarding. Just think of all the friends you have now. They were once new people. Then as you got to know each other, you probably made some great memories together! It's getting over that initial first contact that is a pain in the ass.
Here is what I do when I try to meet new people. For IRL, I like a good sense of fashion. The more unique/goth it is the better. If I meet someone at a gathering, or a con, or what have you, I might point that out to get the conversation started. One of my friends I met because he had the same thigh highs that I had. I told him how great he looked in them and we started discussing fashion. As the conversation went on we got into other topics and a friendship started to blossom. So something simple like that can be a great way to start talking to someone. Maybe they are wearing a shirt with a popular character that you also like. Maybe they're playing a game that you too enjoy. Finding a common interest with someone is a fantastic way to start talking and getting to know each other.
Meeting people online can be a little different. In someways it's easier, in other ways it's harder. Most people list their interests on their profiles of what ever website you are on. This makes it easier for you to find any potential common interests. So you could reach out them and say something like, "Hey there! I'm *name* and I noticed you are into *common interest.* I also really like *common interest*!" You can then add on what you like about it and ask them what it is they like about it. If it's a show, you could mention your favorite character and ask who there's is and why? Maybe the newest season is coming out and you could discuss theories on what might happen next. Something to get the conversation started.
If you just want to do a more generalized greeting, you could simply say, "Hello, I'm *name!* You seemed like an interesting person and I would love to get to know you more. Some interests of mine are *small list, not too big*" It's still best to start with a common interest but if they don't list any, this could be a way to get to know them. It's worked a few times for me. XD
For goodness sake never ever start a online greeting with just, "Hi." Nothing else, just..."Hi." That is a great way to get someone to never respond to you. If you are reaching out to someone, you should be the first one to start the conversation. A proper conversation is like a game of tennis. It goes back and forth, not just one person carrying the whole thing. Some one has to serve the ball, a.k.a. the person starting the conversation. So start that with something! Just don't put, "Hi" and nothing else.
Disagreements. This advice is for both new and old friends alike. We all don't agree on everything. That's just a fact of humanity. It's ok to disagree on things! It's also ok to have an opinion of something even if you are not apart of that group, fandom, country, ect. An outsiders perspective can be incredibly valuable and help prevent echo chambers. There's more I could say on that subject but that would be an entire essay in and of it's self. ^^'
I know this is 2023 and thanks to horse shit like Twitter and Facebook everyone pretends to be an activist and if you don't agree with whatever current issue everyone pretends to be upset about then you are literally evil and I hate you!!!
Lol Joking run on sentence aside. That kind of mindset that so many people have created for themselves is unhealthy and unrealistic. Remember, not everyone is going to agree with you and you are not going to agree with them. That's fine, it's ok to agree to disagree. It's ok to present your point of view and for them to present theirs. If you to can't agree then simply agree to disagree and move on to another topic. Don't unfriend someone just because they don't agree with you on something. Well for the most part. There may be topics that you feel very strong about and if someone has an opposing view that may be a friendship killer. Try to talk to them about it and maybe you can convince them to change their thinking. It really depends on what the subject is and how much it means to you. Always try to reason with someone first. If that doesn't work, either just don't discuss that topic with them or it might mean that you two are not compatible. If it's not something too major or worth ending a friendship over, then just remember to agree to disagree.
Ok now that that's out of the way. Be yourself!! Don't pretend to be someone or something you are not. You are you so act like you! People will catch on real quick if you're faking it. So don't! If someone truly wants to be your friend it's because they like you. So be the best you you can be. Everyone grows, and everyone changes, but never stop being yourself. Whoever and what ever that may be.
The final and most difficult part. The voice in your head. You know the one. The one that says, "They don't actually like me." "I'm probably annoying them." Stop that! I know it's easier said than done. Just ask my Husband, he can attest that I still struggle with it. You just have to always remind yourself that you are not an unlikable git. Try to think of the positive aspects of yourself and put your best foot forward when meeting new people. I fear as a society we have made it out that thinking about yourself in a positive light in any capacity is akin to narcissism. Like we always have to critique ourselves and can never just be happy with who we are. We all need to stop that. It's always good to self reflect but that also means reflecting on the positive aspects. Not just the negatives!!
So if you think your friends don't actually like you, cut that out. Do some people pretend to like you to use you? Yes but you can't constantly live in a state of mind where you think that about everyone. You'll catch on to the phonies and weed them out.
Alright, now get out there and start making friends! Take it one step at a time. Remember, it's not a competition. It's better to have a small number of close friends you truly love. Rather than have a large group of friends who don't actually care about you. Also remember you are not compatible with everyone. That's ok! If a connection doesn't form, no harm done. These things happen. There's plenty of interesting folks out there. Go find them and never stop being you!
Yeah, the thing about rekindling old friendships. It tends to break my heart when I get ghosted by my old friends. There are times when we do talk again, but it doesnt feel the same. Maybe they all grew older and just don't have time for me anymore. I figure if thats the case, then I suppose I should just let them go.
I do get a lot of stranger complements on my anime/cartoon shirts when I wear them out in public haha. xD But I guess my main fear with making new friends is "can I trust this person?" or "is this someone I'll regret getting too close to down the line?" Forgot to mention that I have a paranoia problem along with my social anxiety haha, but I'm trying to get in the mindset that things usually don't turn out as bad as I might think.
Lmao I know the "hi" thing well xD Thats like, 60% of all my DMs lol. I usually just ignore them cause I feel like they're just bots or want something from me.
Man politics really screwed up a lot of people. I personally really hate politics and dont like bringing it up at all. Problem is, its gotten to a point where theres actually people who think you're terrible for not wanting to be political, imagine that haha. Though I guess people like that aren't worth dealing with. Otherwise I'm pretty good at "mediating" things, or at least not escalating things. Over my lifetime, I haven't really made any enemies that I'm aware of, other than maybe some one-off trolls lol.
But yeah I think one improvement I made to my personality over the years is that I stopped being a "people pleaser". I was always so concerned about wanting to be in everyones favor, then I learned that its an unachievable and self-defeating goal. So I adopted this "idgaf anymore" attitude and I feel a lot happier haha. Whatever happens will happen and I'll just have to get over it I suppose lol.
Thanks again for the comment! ^^ Hope it helps others who might be going through the same problems as well :D
Something I'd toss in after reading your comment here: It might be worth looking into Attachment Theory. (some sources focus on attachment issues in romantic relationships, but in my experience, attachment issues also can have a lot of consequences in friendships already)
As for anxiety stuff itself, there is one thing I'd like to mention that I don't find in the comments above:
Anxiety tries to protect you.
It can often be misguided, too easily spooked, but it can help to remind oneself "okay, this feeling is trying to protect me from danger/hurt, but in this situation I am safe enough, nothing really bad will happen, and I can allow myself to let go of this feeling" (easier said than done, I know, but can shift it into perspective at least)
Yeah I understand what its trying to do, but it can be hard to shake off bad thoughts in the back of my head :'D
Well written
Cheering you on <3 <3 <3
The one big advice I would give to someone coming in new is... take your time!
There's a base game and 4 expansions worth of content to play with and almost nothing is fully dead thanks to the daily system that rewards people for doing older stuff, and the Party Finder always has folks doing runs of old side content for any number of reasons, from looking for outfit parts to silly meme runs.
Saying that I would make sure to try the basic trial first. Some folks just don't jive iwth it, and you'd hate to be paying for something you're not enjoying. As the other meme says, it is legit just the base game and first expansion with no limits to play time. There are folks who have maxed out everything from ARR/HW before paying a cent. It would prevent you from making a viera off the bat (though you will get a free Fantasia/character edit that you can save and use once you buy the full game) when you beat the Base Realm Reborn content, and there are a few classes from later expansions you can't use, but if you hit that point where you're able to unlock them and want to keep going, they might have you hooked enough you don't mind giving them money each month :v
I don't want to sound like I'm out here to praise it fully or anything, because it does have it's downs and it's flaws, but I do feel it's deserved it's praise.
But tbh I don't really get into games as much as I used to (even if i really like one, i dont really play for more than 2 weeks straight) but I kinda just wanted to try screwing around in this one for fun and see how I like it lol. I dont know if I'll keep paying the sub for that long though. xD
Sorry, I think the main thing I wanted to say was, it's a good game. Don't worry about rushing to catch up to current content, it's kinda all current thanks to systems they have in place. Nor worry about making folks mad cause you're not doing the perfectest perfect to ever perfect.
Andyeah, if you jump off and on games, I'd def ride the free trial as long as possible. While you're on it, you don't pay a cent, but once you buy the game, you're on the hook for sub money.
But really i think the only thing that prevented me from trying it out earlier is because I usually dont like to pay for subscriptions xD I got too many other monthly bills to pay for lmao
The only really *hard* content that might make folks grumble if you don't have a vague idea of what's going on, you pretty much have to opt into, you're not gonna suddenly find yourself in Savage Raids or something without purposefully being there.
But yes, if you do go for it, I hope you enjoy! If by chance you have any weird little questions that you don't know how or where to ask, give a hollar!
Social anxiety is such a tricky little bitch and is such a big thing to overcome. Excited to do the things ;o;
Thank you though! <3
As for your social anxiety, I’d love to be mutuals with you :) (if you want, no pressure of course)
Haha well, i usually dont like to jump into new friendships so soon. xD For me, its usually like a slow process. But thank you for reaching out anyway <3