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Talking into the void. Yet, I know what I'd like to have.
2 years ago
some say I am crazy, and I'd say that they're at least half right.
I haven't done one of these in a long time, and I haven't been totally honest with myself about all of my thoughts on this matter.
Though I have tried to do my best to be totally honest with my requited about my needs in this matter.
Even so, I refuse to hurt or confuse us, any one of us(I hope you know who you are to me).
I refuse to damage what is, for what I want to be.
I can't, I won't, even try to force it to be.
All I can do is wait, hope and trust.
That I am doing this correctly, and with time all of our bent and worn pieces could come together if you'd accept such that is.
Into something beautiful and supporting each of our needs, our wants, and our lives.
It pains me to see us separate, fighting so hard to just hold our own pieces together, and keep going.
I wish I could just put you each back together, better than new, and protected from then on.
But I can't, I know this.
We each had our own harms, in one's case by my own actions, and as I just said I refuse to do more harm in this unto any one of you.
I can only support each of you, as my friend, as my want, and in one's case as my requited.
Free to continue to heal, recover, and dare I hope trust me, again in one's case.
I have at least in part done most of my recovering times over, yes, I have messed up; hurt people, used people, and learned to be better.
As once-beaten animals, can't learn to trust or recover, under a quick or heavy hand.
Though I freely admit that what I'd like, would be seen as selfish by most.
I truly want it just as much for each one of you, to not be separate anymore.
As much as I, myself, want to be protected and with people that know how much it hurts to be hurt, and thus I hope will try our best, even my own, not to harm any one of us more.
What I am thinking, may not truly be love to be totally honest(lust may be the better word in all honesty), though it is also caring in its purest form, for each one of you. And the standing offer of intimacy, should you choose and when or even if you're able and wanting of it, or not(the last thing I'd want is for any one of you to feel that you'd have to).
What I am saying is I'd like to pick the choice of the shoots that I have found over my life thus far, and then live out the rest of my life with you, without plucking any one of you or stressing any one of you.
Each one of you is so very dear to me, in your own ways.
I'd give almost anything to have each one of you; rest next to me, use me, and try to build a comfortable life for us, each one of us.
Though I have tried to do my best to be totally honest with my requited about my needs in this matter.
Even so, I refuse to hurt or confuse us, any one of us(I hope you know who you are to me).
I refuse to damage what is, for what I want to be.
I can't, I won't, even try to force it to be.
All I can do is wait, hope and trust.
That I am doing this correctly, and with time all of our bent and worn pieces could come together if you'd accept such that is.
Into something beautiful and supporting each of our needs, our wants, and our lives.
It pains me to see us separate, fighting so hard to just hold our own pieces together, and keep going.
I wish I could just put you each back together, better than new, and protected from then on.
But I can't, I know this.
We each had our own harms, in one's case by my own actions, and as I just said I refuse to do more harm in this unto any one of you.
I can only support each of you, as my friend, as my want, and in one's case as my requited.
Free to continue to heal, recover, and dare I hope trust me, again in one's case.
I have at least in part done most of my recovering times over, yes, I have messed up; hurt people, used people, and learned to be better.
As once-beaten animals, can't learn to trust or recover, under a quick or heavy hand.
Though I freely admit that what I'd like, would be seen as selfish by most.
I truly want it just as much for each one of you, to not be separate anymore.
As much as I, myself, want to be protected and with people that know how much it hurts to be hurt, and thus I hope will try our best, even my own, not to harm any one of us more.
What I am thinking, may not truly be love to be totally honest(lust may be the better word in all honesty), though it is also caring in its purest form, for each one of you. And the standing offer of intimacy, should you choose and when or even if you're able and wanting of it, or not(the last thing I'd want is for any one of you to feel that you'd have to).
What I am saying is I'd like to pick the choice of the shoots that I have found over my life thus far, and then live out the rest of my life with you, without plucking any one of you or stressing any one of you.
Each one of you is so very dear to me, in your own ways.
I'd give almost anything to have each one of you; rest next to me, use me, and try to build a comfortable life for us, each one of us.
