It may be that I've never been able to overcome my problems, no matter how hard I try I've never been able to integrate well into groups or with the new people I've met these days. When I try to bring one of my drawings online I literally feel outclassed by the creations of others who seem to be light years ahead of me, and even trying to chat with artists whom I greatly respect and admire I get so much indifference. They too are probably light years ahead. And perhaps here I realize how small a fish I really am in this huge ocean.

And I too find this reasoning childish and every time I think about it I laugh,

To draw conclusions because I don't want to seem logorrheic I find myself in a shitty, endless circle where any of my attempts always bring me back to the starting point.

And unfortunately I'm tired of trying.
I think it's time to stop and close this chapter that between good and bad things has lasted too long.