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Emergency Situation!
2 years ago
I know I left this site not long ago but, I'm sorry, I need everyone's help. Please read.
So, after asking around on a sub-reddit (by suggested to many to do so) it seems this situation Demir and I are in have gotten so bad that we have no choice but to move out of here ASAP. I am already contacting Animal Rescue to resolve his mum's animal hoarding issue and I plan to contact authorities as soon as I can. I hate that it befalls to me to do this since we were really hoping his mum would finally see how fucked we are and actually try to help us improve the situation, but.. nope. She'd rather bitch about it and do fuck-all. I know hoarding is a seriously difficult issue to take care of and often requires intervention and, sadly, this intervention will be one hell of a rude awaking for his mum because we may lose this house.
So yeah, I have no clue what Demir and I can do currently, we don't really have anyone that can give us a temporary place to stay and we don't have the money to just.. up and leave so I don't know what to do. We just... can't keep dealing with this forever. It's already affecting my health and is probably affecting his and his mum's. Half the house smells, badly, of cat piss and the entire house is falling apart, this cannot continue any longer.
I do also know his mum may go into a fit of rage and kick me the hell out for doing this, but what choice do I have? She refuses to do anything about it, even when we've tried to get her to improve and tried to tell her that hoarding cats is making the living situation so much worse.
Most I can do is ask to donate to my Ko-fi to help us out so.. here we go: https://ko-fi.com/littlesoftspacefluff
...I just hope this doesn't tear me and Demir apart.
Basically, this is what one commenter has said (and all agree with them):
"this is a really tough situation to be in but if i were in that situation, my actions would come down to one issue: safety. safety of those animals, and (despite her anger) safety for your boyfriend's mother. if floorboards are in danger of caving in, if water is leaking into the house, if animals are sick and suffering, someone has to step in to be a responsible adult here and it seems like that's fallen to you. floorboards are the least of the house's problems: your number 1 issue is that roof. any water coming in will weaken wood and cause mold, which will sicken the animals just as much as the humans there. water coming in could cause an electrical fire because water and power don't mix. even though you lack resources and transportation, if you call adult protective services for the safety of the humans and the ASPCA for the safety of the animals, then you all can get health and safety squared away. for APS though, i'm sure his mother will refuse to let anyone inside so you need to physically open the door for them and give them permission to come inside. you live there and have the power to invite them in. her owning the house means nothing.
you say you want to fix up the house, but i need to tell you honestly, that its going to take hundreds of thousands of dollars to fix a house where floorboards are rotten through and every wall has mold. know how i know this? my family home where i grew up was left to sit for a few years while the housing market "stabilized." during that time, a pipe burst but because no one was living there, the house grew mold for an undetermined time period. the home insurance paid nothing and half the house was affected. as it turns out, the mold it grew was so toxic that no one was allowed inside without special suits and respirators which had to be stripped off after exiting the house then sent to be incinerated for safety. a quote to rip out all the walls/insulation/flooring/etc without treating the mold or rebuilding ANYTHING was going to cost 250k. if you are not in a place to spend that kind of money which you don't have, you all need to get out of there and sell the property as is so it can be torn down."
EDIT: Demir pleaded with me to hold off for a bit longer to try and push his mum to do some kind of improvement, I really didn't want to but.. I caved in since I am aware that if I do it immediately, he'd have a panic attack. This is still an emergency situation, I don't want to hold off for much longer.
I won't be as active on the internet and I'll be putting off everything to focus on life, I can't just sit around and do nothing.
So, after asking around on a sub-reddit (by suggested to many to do so) it seems this situation Demir and I are in have gotten so bad that we have no choice but to move out of here ASAP. I am already contacting Animal Rescue to resolve his mum's animal hoarding issue and I plan to contact authorities as soon as I can. I hate that it befalls to me to do this since we were really hoping his mum would finally see how fucked we are and actually try to help us improve the situation, but.. nope. She'd rather bitch about it and do fuck-all. I know hoarding is a seriously difficult issue to take care of and often requires intervention and, sadly, this intervention will be one hell of a rude awaking for his mum because we may lose this house.
So yeah, I have no clue what Demir and I can do currently, we don't really have anyone that can give us a temporary place to stay and we don't have the money to just.. up and leave so I don't know what to do. We just... can't keep dealing with this forever. It's already affecting my health and is probably affecting his and his mum's. Half the house smells, badly, of cat piss and the entire house is falling apart, this cannot continue any longer.
I do also know his mum may go into a fit of rage and kick me the hell out for doing this, but what choice do I have? She refuses to do anything about it, even when we've tried to get her to improve and tried to tell her that hoarding cats is making the living situation so much worse.
Most I can do is ask to donate to my Ko-fi to help us out so.. here we go: https://ko-fi.com/littlesoftspacefluff
...I just hope this doesn't tear me and Demir apart.
Basically, this is what one commenter has said (and all agree with them):
"this is a really tough situation to be in but if i were in that situation, my actions would come down to one issue: safety. safety of those animals, and (despite her anger) safety for your boyfriend's mother. if floorboards are in danger of caving in, if water is leaking into the house, if animals are sick and suffering, someone has to step in to be a responsible adult here and it seems like that's fallen to you. floorboards are the least of the house's problems: your number 1 issue is that roof. any water coming in will weaken wood and cause mold, which will sicken the animals just as much as the humans there. water coming in could cause an electrical fire because water and power don't mix. even though you lack resources and transportation, if you call adult protective services for the safety of the humans and the ASPCA for the safety of the animals, then you all can get health and safety squared away. for APS though, i'm sure his mother will refuse to let anyone inside so you need to physically open the door for them and give them permission to come inside. you live there and have the power to invite them in. her owning the house means nothing.
you say you want to fix up the house, but i need to tell you honestly, that its going to take hundreds of thousands of dollars to fix a house where floorboards are rotten through and every wall has mold. know how i know this? my family home where i grew up was left to sit for a few years while the housing market "stabilized." during that time, a pipe burst but because no one was living there, the house grew mold for an undetermined time period. the home insurance paid nothing and half the house was affected. as it turns out, the mold it grew was so toxic that no one was allowed inside without special suits and respirators which had to be stripped off after exiting the house then sent to be incinerated for safety. a quote to rip out all the walls/insulation/flooring/etc without treating the mold or rebuilding ANYTHING was going to cost 250k. if you are not in a place to spend that kind of money which you don't have, you all need to get out of there and sell the property as is so it can be torn down."
EDIT: Demir pleaded with me to hold off for a bit longer to try and push his mum to do some kind of improvement, I really didn't want to but.. I caved in since I am aware that if I do it immediately, he'd have a panic attack. This is still an emergency situation, I don't want to hold off for much longer.
I won't be as active on the internet and I'll be putting off everything to focus on life, I can't just sit around and do nothing.
