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The Allegations Against Me
2 years ago
Consider the following:
Time to address the elephant in the room.
All I can say now is that I am sorry. I only ask to be held accountable for my actions, and I accept full responsibility for everything I did. I know that I apologized too late, but it's better late than never.
I try not to guilt-trip anyone over the following message. You might not forgive me for what I did, and that's okay; I understand. Other than the fact that I was ignorant, there is no good defense or justification for this. Looking back at what I did, I am disgusted. I only ask for forgiveness from those I've hurt and made sad. I am trying to adjust myself, but it only takes one step at a time.
In January 2021, I dated a 12-year-old at 15. I was looking for love. I didn't know that 12x15 was bad. Because I had a severe belly fetish and my hormones were in turmoil, I did an explicit roleplay with them. I promise you, it wasn’t sexual. I was just fetishizing my belly. I didn't know any better. I didn't realize what I was doing until I got "caught." I denied everything and swept the situation under the rug, never talking about it again until I was forced to.
In 2022, I claimed that "9/11 was deserved." It was a joke, but I shouldn't have said it. I should’ve read the room. It’s my fault that I was ignorant enough to make that joke. What’s so deserving about almost 3,000 people dying anyway? I also made a joke about my former friend's character (the character is a minor) getting raped by another character (made by the same friend). I also wanted to draw it. I thought it was funny, but now that I look back, it's very insensitive. Again, I take all the blame. I apologized to the person, but they haven't forgiven me yet, and I doubt they ever will. I do not blame them if they never do.
The rape joke was the final straw for my former friends, and they all left me and attacked me. Mind you, I said even worse things before. Then a rumor of me being a pedophile spread (the rumor is NOT true, by the way; I hate little kids).
I and the 12-year-old, now 13, had a chat a week later in August, and they taught me how to improve and apologize to people. I made an apology video, but it backfired and got spammed with dislikes. So, I had to go on hiatus on my YouTube channel until 2023.
I tried to hide my actions so people don't hate me. It was a stupid move. I lied to everyone and sugar-coated my actions. I, again, apologize. I told everyone what I did before, but it was very vague because I didn't want people to leave me. That was my biggest fear.
This is all I can remember. If I left anything out, I do apologize. If most of my followers forgive me, I will continue doing things I love. I will maybe take a break and think about my actions and how to improve. I'm trying to change, but it takes one step at a time.
Thank you for reading.
All I can say now is that I am sorry. I only ask to be held accountable for my actions, and I accept full responsibility for everything I did. I know that I apologized too late, but it's better late than never.
I try not to guilt-trip anyone over the following message. You might not forgive me for what I did, and that's okay; I understand. Other than the fact that I was ignorant, there is no good defense or justification for this. Looking back at what I did, I am disgusted. I only ask for forgiveness from those I've hurt and made sad. I am trying to adjust myself, but it only takes one step at a time.
In January 2021, I dated a 12-year-old at 15. I was looking for love. I didn't know that 12x15 was bad. Because I had a severe belly fetish and my hormones were in turmoil, I did an explicit roleplay with them. I promise you, it wasn’t sexual. I was just fetishizing my belly. I didn't know any better. I didn't realize what I was doing until I got "caught." I denied everything and swept the situation under the rug, never talking about it again until I was forced to.
In 2022, I claimed that "9/11 was deserved." It was a joke, but I shouldn't have said it. I should’ve read the room. It’s my fault that I was ignorant enough to make that joke. What’s so deserving about almost 3,000 people dying anyway? I also made a joke about my former friend's character (the character is a minor) getting raped by another character (made by the same friend). I also wanted to draw it. I thought it was funny, but now that I look back, it's very insensitive. Again, I take all the blame. I apologized to the person, but they haven't forgiven me yet, and I doubt they ever will. I do not blame them if they never do.
The rape joke was the final straw for my former friends, and they all left me and attacked me. Mind you, I said even worse things before. Then a rumor of me being a pedophile spread (the rumor is NOT true, by the way; I hate little kids).
I and the 12-year-old, now 13, had a chat a week later in August, and they taught me how to improve and apologize to people. I made an apology video, but it backfired and got spammed with dislikes. So, I had to go on hiatus on my YouTube channel until 2023.
I tried to hide my actions so people don't hate me. It was a stupid move. I lied to everyone and sugar-coated my actions. I, again, apologize. I told everyone what I did before, but it was very vague because I didn't want people to leave me. That was my biggest fear.
This is all I can remember. If I left anything out, I do apologize. If most of my followers forgive me, I will continue doing things I love. I will maybe take a break and think about my actions and how to improve. I'm trying to change, but it takes one step at a time.
Thank you for reading.
Comment posting has been disabled by the journal owner.
You should be the one getting help. I'm getting help as we speak.
you're fine, is not good what you two did, but is stupid attack you for something what you did when you was just a early-adolecent... and if you already apologized and learned the lesson...
About the joke, prepare to be hate, take charge of your jokes, but at the end of the day, is just a joke to and don't really have to apologize about it.
And no. you're not a pedophile, i saw a real one and you're VERY far away for being that. don't worry about it.
Maybe super late answer but a friend told me about this and i just got curious of why so much drama between little kids.
Those guys are than mean like they say you're. They shouldn't draw other kids insulting them.
I'm here because one of those insulted one of my friends who don't have nothing to be in this thing and is very young to
Sorry for my bad grammar, my english not good enough yet
Which friend told you about this, and which friend got insulted? Just curious.
you were still young, hell IM STILL YOUNG! WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES, TELL THEM TO GROW THE HELL UP AND MOVE ON. ITS LIKE YOU STOLE THEIR ICECREAM WHEN THEY WERE 3 AND THEY HELD A GRUDGE