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Why I stopped masturbating & a discussion of self control
2 years ago
General
Yeah that's a title, and talking about this may seem a little TMI but it's all in service to talk about self control.
I am 36 and I believe I accidentally learned how to masturbate somewhere around 11 or 12 years old. Raging puberty hormones and all that. I haven't done this every day since, but certainly around twice a week if not a bit more.
A few things to speak of in regards to this, I would often times couple a masturbation session along with a drawing session. So thanks to this I would often be distracted with wanting to draw things that arouse me, so basically defaulting to certain things. Well back near the start of April I got sick, nothing serious just a minor cold. Well when I am sick I am not in the mood for masturbating which also prevents me from wanting to draw as well. Well over the next few days I started to give it some thought, "do I really need/want to masturbate anymore" and the conclusion I came to was no, I do not.
And over the past month I have no slipped from this and have still been able to draw the things I want and control myself from getting aroused.
This has had beneficial effects in that I am able to focus and take more time in figuring out and attempting to draw some more poses. That's why some of the stuff I have drawn lately have had a little more pose experimentation.
In the long run though I have been more and more leaning to the side of favoring simple pinup styled images. I have never really liked buttholes, never likes vaginas, am not terribly fond of overtly sexual things so I do really see it as though I like more tame things in the long run.
So the reason I speak of this is to talk about self control. I find it interesting when that whole "No Nut November" thing rolls around and people talk about failing this in a matter of a week or so. At least from my perspective this shows a lack of self control.
Having self control is not a bad thing, there are so many benefits to be gained from it.
You don't have to buy this thing that is by all intents and purposes optional or unnecessary.
You do not have to masturbate for that quick few seconds of pleasure.
You do not have to play a video game for excessively long periods of time.
You do not have to overeat and so on.
Being able to tell yourself no is a very useful thing that anyone can do if they are willing to try. Take it from someone who has masturbated for nearly 25 years, I was able to give it up at the drop of a hat and I am okay with it. In fact I am happy that I gave it up. No longer do I have to worry about being interrupted, no longer do I have to worry about disposing of the aftermath, no longer do I have to think about my next fap, I am just over it.
But anyway, sorry for the TMI journal. Don't take it as disgusting, take it as something to think about. Self control can be a good thing.
I am 36 and I believe I accidentally learned how to masturbate somewhere around 11 or 12 years old. Raging puberty hormones and all that. I haven't done this every day since, but certainly around twice a week if not a bit more.
A few things to speak of in regards to this, I would often times couple a masturbation session along with a drawing session. So thanks to this I would often be distracted with wanting to draw things that arouse me, so basically defaulting to certain things. Well back near the start of April I got sick, nothing serious just a minor cold. Well when I am sick I am not in the mood for masturbating which also prevents me from wanting to draw as well. Well over the next few days I started to give it some thought, "do I really need/want to masturbate anymore" and the conclusion I came to was no, I do not.
And over the past month I have no slipped from this and have still been able to draw the things I want and control myself from getting aroused.
This has had beneficial effects in that I am able to focus and take more time in figuring out and attempting to draw some more poses. That's why some of the stuff I have drawn lately have had a little more pose experimentation.
In the long run though I have been more and more leaning to the side of favoring simple pinup styled images. I have never really liked buttholes, never likes vaginas, am not terribly fond of overtly sexual things so I do really see it as though I like more tame things in the long run.
So the reason I speak of this is to talk about self control. I find it interesting when that whole "No Nut November" thing rolls around and people talk about failing this in a matter of a week or so. At least from my perspective this shows a lack of self control.
Having self control is not a bad thing, there are so many benefits to be gained from it.
You don't have to buy this thing that is by all intents and purposes optional or unnecessary.
You do not have to masturbate for that quick few seconds of pleasure.
You do not have to play a video game for excessively long periods of time.
You do not have to overeat and so on.
Being able to tell yourself no is a very useful thing that anyone can do if they are willing to try. Take it from someone who has masturbated for nearly 25 years, I was able to give it up at the drop of a hat and I am okay with it. In fact I am happy that I gave it up. No longer do I have to worry about being interrupted, no longer do I have to worry about disposing of the aftermath, no longer do I have to think about my next fap, I am just over it.
But anyway, sorry for the TMI journal. Don't take it as disgusting, take it as something to think about. Self control can be a good thing.
But I have had this huge list of characters I have wanted to draw, so this will be a means to draw them. So I say that's a positive for me.
Also, relatable.
anyways, thanks for sharing this - uh - thing with us
For anyone else reading this:
Tool is an important keyword here
There's a correct application and incorrect application for tools.
INCORRECT: Using self-control to achieve a goal that doesn't serve your purpose
- Wanking is not important to 9-puzzle but may be important part of your life. What you want is not necessarily what 9-puzzle wants. It may or may not be and it's in your interest to sit down and reflect on what you want in life
There's a correct way and an incorrect way to use a tool.
INCORRECT: Using self-control to the point of deprivation of a need
- If you fight your body too much, your body will viciously assume control. You need to haggle with your body to see what it's okay with doing. Self-control is a balancing act. In 9-puzzle's case, their body was fine with stopping it completely. But you are not 9-puzzle and depriving yourself of a need and constantly forcing your body in an irritable state by saying No too often is not self-control, it's self-deprivation.
INCORRECT: Using self-control on the wrong behavior.
- You want to draw more? Does less masturbation necessarily result in you drawing more? For some people yes, some people no. In 9-puzzle's case, it did help. But there's other people who only really feel like drawing when they're horny and are POWERED by horny. So don't automatically assume that just because it worked for 9-puzzle, it will work for you. It may or may not and you'll need to do some trial and error.
Over this past month I can see that my desire to wank was not an obsession/addiction. Giving it up has caused me no issues and I don't feel the need to go back.
And as said drawing has been helped as I can draw some of the pinup or more complex stuff I have wanted to draw. Like some robots that I have ignored for example.