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Medical Update
2 years ago
An explanation as to why I'm taking a break from commissionsIt's recently come to my attention that I'm experiencing some serious symptoms of prolonged exposure to stress. Stress isn't new to me, I experience it every day. However after getting a psychiatric evaluation I was told by my psychologist that she would be surprised if I lived past 40 due to my resting heartrate being far higher than it should be. For years I assumed that my fainting spells were do to my social anxiety. I struggle going to grocery stores and other large crowded places because I'm prone to fainting, but I'm also likely to faint because I get overly excited when speaking to someone I haven't seen in a long while. I've recently found out that these fainting spells are not due to panic attacks, it's due to my heart. I also experience endless fatigue, some days I even struggle to walk because I feel so weak in my knees, such symptoms getting worse if I'm particularly stressed about something. The worst case of this resulting in me being paralyzed from the neck down, unable to move my limbs, and when put in a wheelchair to be rushed to an emergency room I could barely hold up my own head. (This event happened years ago while in high school)
So I've been dealing with this overwhelming amount of stress for over 9 years, and I have never once given my body time to recover.
I'm currently taking medication that'll slow my heartrate and relieve some of my anxiety. As well as that I'm also taking a break from commissions for this entire month and possibly even next month. However I refuse to take a break for any longer than that. I might also rework how I take commissions as well as raising my prices as I tend to get swarmed with commissions. I have a bad habit of accepting commissions from friends despite already having a full queue so I'm going to be more strict about that next time that I open.
I hope that everyone understands and has a wonderful day
I was starting to wonder what was the matter. I totally understand that you need to put things on hold. Don’t worry about my commission, I can wait as long as you need. Please take care of yourself, you don’t deserve to be overworked/stressed.
Definitely step back from those responsibilities if you can get your body to behave in the process. And of course, supply and demand of your artistry does stand to reason that you can increase your prices in future, and hopefully you won't be overwhelmed by so many people who missed the small window on offer/the window expands.
As for your "bad habit", yea.... that is sorta where my own anxiety comes in, where talking with people who's art I like; I never want to take advantage of their friendship, to jump a queue or burden them with more responsibilities.... It is sort of the reason why I am so good at being quiet and patient. Either way, certainly focus on resting for now, and you can work out a plan closer to when you feel ready to return to taking commissions.
Wish you the best Terra!