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Big guy with a little guy...
2 years ago
It's a really popular image, some big tall fat and/or muscular guy with a tiny skinny one, usually a wolf or fox, sometimes even a YCH. I get why it's popular but it completely turns me off, and kinda makes me angry sometimes. Basically it feels... dishonest.
I've always been into big dudes. When I was in my early 20s I was super thin and "pretty". Blond, green-eyed twink. Never was interested in other twinks though, I always pursued big guys. 99 times out of 100 the response was
"Sorry I only like other big dudes."
The 1 time out of 100 that a guy was interested, it was this whole "You're beautiful, I'm so big and ugly" self-hatred therapy process. It didn't work out too well since I saw HIM as beautiful and I saw myself as scrawny and ugly. Two people who hate themselves can't easily heal each other.
Over the years I became a big guy, myself. I have a big husband. We occasionally are treated with... tolerance/pity by twinks. We often see other big couples. It's very, very rare to see a big guy with a little guy.
Anyway, whenever I see one of those drawings, it brings back all those experiences and takes all the enjoyment out of it. Thanks for reading!
-Rowan
I've always been into big dudes. When I was in my early 20s I was super thin and "pretty". Blond, green-eyed twink. Never was interested in other twinks though, I always pursued big guys. 99 times out of 100 the response was
"Sorry I only like other big dudes."
The 1 time out of 100 that a guy was interested, it was this whole "You're beautiful, I'm so big and ugly" self-hatred therapy process. It didn't work out too well since I saw HIM as beautiful and I saw myself as scrawny and ugly. Two people who hate themselves can't easily heal each other.
Over the years I became a big guy, myself. I have a big husband. We occasionally are treated with... tolerance/pity by twinks. We often see other big couples. It's very, very rare to see a big guy with a little guy.
Anyway, whenever I see one of those drawings, it brings back all those experiences and takes all the enjoyment out of it. Thanks for reading!
-Rowan
I think that it's very common for younger gay men to be interested in older ones. Whether it's an attraction to people purely for physical reasons, or because they'd love to have someone with greater life experience than they have. I'm sure we all know that being a young gay man with no gay family can be extremely challenging, and having an older person to guide you into this life (and to have sex with to boot!) is what I think a lot of us might've liked at that age.
I've seen young gym bunny types express distaste in older men before. But it doesn't always go that way. As you stated, it's very frequent for younger men to be turned down by older ones, and that constant rejection can breed resentment.
Let's just try to treat each other well, and not complain about preferences that don't match our own.
I think it's important to understand that I'm not "complaining about preferences that don't match mine" in this journal. I'm expressing how my life experiences make certain imagery feel dishonest. I can hardly criticize smaller guys for preferring larger guys, since that used to be me.
I think the reality is that a lot of people are angsty and dwell on what they can't have. Furry breaks the mould a little with all this fantasy. The little things don't matter as much if I can dream I'm a dog.