I’ve had birthdays before where I was just coming back from Kamloops or friends and family have just been busy or had other plans from months ago, and normally I don’t really go overboard with celebrating anyways. But.... I dunno, just something about this year feels kinda ‘off.’

I already had plans for this year of what I wanted to do and how I wanted to move forward with my life, but it seems like I’ve actually gone backwards. The whole issue of me not getting paid in Kamloops, along with all of the nonsense that happened up there feels like it aged me almost 4 years. I just feel like I have barely any motivation to do much and it’s still taking me a while to just decompress and try to get back into the swing of things. Honestly, I’m still trying to figure out what my next step should be. I need new work shoes, clothes, computer, phone, etc..., but I don’t have the money right now. It’s basically me waiting for who knows how long for me to actually get paid when my dad hopefully gets the check that we’ve been waiting longer than 2 months for.

Things were supposed to be different this year. 😕