Why I haven't been uploading (Vent)
2 years ago
Hey some of you are most likely wondering why I haven't been uploading all that much now, well in this journal I will explain the reasons:
1. Rising drama with FA,
This might just be me overexaggerating but let me explain:
Some users seem to be leaving this site due to the recent changes with Furaffinity either with other users and overall the big changes the site itself made like one of the most recent updates caused a ton of confusion/controversy with how artist can make art and such. In tern making some user not use this site as much or fully abandon it. I'm not sure if Furaffinity will get better itself but with how the world is going I don't think it will.
2. My art always needs improvement,
I know that is suppose to be supportive criticism but I have been drawing since 2013-2014 which makes it 10-9 years since I really started doing so and even now it seems to only improve a tad bit since all those years so when some says it needs improvement, it sucks, not the type of art I prefer and such like that it really makes me feel like I should just quit because it's just wasting my time. It doesn't help that 90% or more of the people who says these words never tell me how I can improve it and this issue leads into the next one.
3. No motivation to draw (Or really anything anymore)
Knowing my art will never be good enough for others gives me the lack of motivation to not even draw. Even if people said it was nice enough, with how my life is going with trying to do anything that can bring enjoyment to me has seem to be all faded away. I try doing image edit work, other forms of art, playing video games I enjoyed, learning new knowledge, roleplaying with others, and so much more seems to lost all enjoyment in doing those activities. Some days I'm so terrible with my emotions and more I can't even be bothered to even the most easy of tasks including easy chores. I would vent more about my life but it seems everyone on here is in similar situations where they just been beaten down by life to do anything but think about sleeping or the sweet relief of death for some.
4. Taken advantage of in the past (many years ago)
There was a time where I seem to almost draw everyday for certain people instead of just drawing what I want or a good friend wants me to draw for a trade/gift I use to draw thousands of images for ungrateful people example this one person would always ask for a image of some cartoon character doing the splits in bikinis everyday. There is at least one user on here who took advantage of me when we use to date, I won't say the user's name but they know who they are.
Conclusion:
1. Tons of Drama on Furaffinity from users and the site itself
2. My art will never seem to improve enough for enough people to enjoy it
3. I have no motivation to draw not only because of my art never seeming good enough but life has seem to be beating me mentally and emotionally
4. Years ago I have been taken advantage of including at least one user on here
With all these issues I haven't been uploading little to nothing on this site and I wouldn't be suppressed if I don't upload on here or anywhere anymore, I'm not sure if I can ever be truly helped due to my life issues including always lacking skill to be good/really good at anything.
1. Rising drama with FA,
This might just be me overexaggerating but let me explain:
Some users seem to be leaving this site due to the recent changes with Furaffinity either with other users and overall the big changes the site itself made like one of the most recent updates caused a ton of confusion/controversy with how artist can make art and such. In tern making some user not use this site as much or fully abandon it. I'm not sure if Furaffinity will get better itself but with how the world is going I don't think it will.
2. My art always needs improvement,
I know that is suppose to be supportive criticism but I have been drawing since 2013-2014 which makes it 10-9 years since I really started doing so and even now it seems to only improve a tad bit since all those years so when some says it needs improvement, it sucks, not the type of art I prefer and such like that it really makes me feel like I should just quit because it's just wasting my time. It doesn't help that 90% or more of the people who says these words never tell me how I can improve it and this issue leads into the next one.
3. No motivation to draw (Or really anything anymore)
Knowing my art will never be good enough for others gives me the lack of motivation to not even draw. Even if people said it was nice enough, with how my life is going with trying to do anything that can bring enjoyment to me has seem to be all faded away. I try doing image edit work, other forms of art, playing video games I enjoyed, learning new knowledge, roleplaying with others, and so much more seems to lost all enjoyment in doing those activities. Some days I'm so terrible with my emotions and more I can't even be bothered to even the most easy of tasks including easy chores. I would vent more about my life but it seems everyone on here is in similar situations where they just been beaten down by life to do anything but think about sleeping or the sweet relief of death for some.
4. Taken advantage of in the past (many years ago)
There was a time where I seem to almost draw everyday for certain people instead of just drawing what I want or a good friend wants me to draw for a trade/gift I use to draw thousands of images for ungrateful people example this one person would always ask for a image of some cartoon character doing the splits in bikinis everyday. There is at least one user on here who took advantage of me when we use to date, I won't say the user's name but they know who they are.
Conclusion:
1. Tons of Drama on Furaffinity from users and the site itself
2. My art will never seem to improve enough for enough people to enjoy it
3. I have no motivation to draw not only because of my art never seeming good enough but life has seem to be beating me mentally and emotionally
4. Years ago I have been taken advantage of including at least one user on here
With all these issues I haven't been uploading little to nothing on this site and I wouldn't be suppressed if I don't upload on here or anywhere anymore, I'm not sure if I can ever be truly helped due to my life issues including always lacking skill to be good/really good at anything.
BURN OUT SUCKS. I HATE ITTTTTT
You are one of the first that interacted with me, when I'm still starting here so I'm always grateful to you. I hope this situation will get better :3
It works for me for therapy since I don't have time for draw at all now, but some engines can create fast any type of ideas and break any art block. I can try some styles and even the same image can be changed so it helps at least for distraction.
Maybe the best images I may redraw them in my style from zero.
The honest truth is that no-one can tell what people like - heck, we even ourselves can't control what we like - we just like thing or don't. Being blunt about it is just another thing. And you can't please anyone -> therefore focus on pleasing the only person that matter the most to you: You! Draw for yourself. If you are happy about it, what does it matter what others think. It's a nice plus when other do like what you make
on that note: Glad to know you like my written stories, and thank you ^_^
I'm all for self improvement.
But you know I don't do drawings myself - I can just imaging stuff for my written stories
So take my advice with grain of salt
like I watch more drawing tutorials and shorts on youtube that I actually draw xD
But anyway;
imo, good way to improve is to find art that you like to draw and figure out how to trace that. Just quick honest feedback I could say based on your gallery:
-You can draw with Consistent style, which is more than I can do
-your body portions could use some direct reference in prove
-Dynamic poses! That's something you could try to spice things up:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJnbnFOkcOI
above is tutorial channel I like to follow, but it that guy annoys you then search "sketching dynamic poses"
-Try thinking what interesting thing your characters can do, and draw that. Not how you can draw atm, but how you COULD draw (I hope this makes sense)
But experiment! Try new things - fail, fail and fail, because that's the only way to succeed in the end - just don't show your first experimental pictures since they they are just that, experiments. I know I have lots of my own drafts that I have re-written three times before even consider putting them out.
sorry for the long post - I just get excited on self improvement - I hope you do as well ^_^
Don't know about FA drama - I have enough of that in Bluesky
I hate that people have talked down about your art. In my opinion, I think you hold a lot of talent. Not many people can accomplish or even draw the things you draw. Heck you have drawn some things better than me! As for criticism, people should only give it if someone asks them to do it, other than that. Those people should mind their business.
Depression is not fun, neither is poor mental health. I was at the worst of my worst last year, and this year, and in 2021 and 2020. It's hard. even doing simple chores. I hate that it affects you that way, it really hurts me a lot seeing a good friend of mine going through it. I just want you to know that you are not alone in this because I am right here with you.
I hate hate HATE abusive relationships, and people, I wish I could dip their socks in cold ice water to have them wear indefinitely. I absolutely hate that you have been taken advantage of, and I wish I could punch those people in their stupid throats. You are like a brother to me, and you definitely do not deserve that. Especially with how kind and patient you are with people. Heck, I think you are one of if not THE kindest and most generous person I have met on here. You DMed me when I first followed you and heck you are the only one that wants to join me when I am on VRchat.
You don't deserve any of the things that are happening to you, I really hope that things get better for you and you eventually come back, but whatever the decision, I will always be here to support you as a friend <3