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The Gray Area - Who is Ruffle now?
2 years ago
General
Hey everyone - long time, no chat. This is going to be a long one, but I'm looking for your advice.
2023 is coming to a close, and with it I'm finding myself in a bit of a reflective mood - namely concerning the question - who is Ruffle?
When he first bounced onto the scene in 2016, it was clear. He was a reflection of my personality - warm, cuddly, sociable, and very SFW. He was essentially myself, but a cartoon dragon.
See this and this as some pieces that really embodied his spirit. Very fluffy, but very pure. As stated, it was really a reflection of me. I was going to school full time at a religious university, preparing to go on a proselyting mission, and adhering to strict moral and ethical standards.
Those of you who know me know that the mission didn't go as planned. I've alluded to it here if you've been a long-time follower of mine, but I left early because of some health concerns and with it, my faith in God fizzled out as well. Slowly, over the course of the last few years, I've found myself adrift from where I was. I've started exploring things outside of the bubble that my faith had kept me in and working on finding myself. But in the process, I feel like I may have lost Ruffle a bit.
Don't get me wrong, he's never been nsfw. Not explicit, bits showing, nsfw at least. But that innocent, pure tone has been overshadowed by something I've explored more in myself lately - my dominant side. Truth be told, I really enjoy pushing buttons. I love making people flustered - making them blush and stutter. It makes my heart race and I feel immense satisfaction in doing so. This exploration has also begun to manifest itself in the type of art I've commissioned - which, while not being explicit, definitely has lost that innocent luster to it. Take for example the pieces I've gotten with paw worship or the other macro art I've gotten. They definitely carry a different tone with them than the wholesome good boy I was at the outset.
Now, here's where it gets even more confusing:
I've essentially always gotten macro art of ruffle. The first piece I posted was in 2017. But it clearly has a different tone to it.
That said, this piece was posted less than a month later and was distinctly more... you know...
I guess all I'm trying to say is Ruffle has been going through a bit of an identity crisis, because I have been as well. I'm struggling to figure out how I should display him to the world, I suppose. Should I bifurcate my online presence into a more innocent side (wholesome fursuiting, all-audience art, and essentially a character account) and a more mature side (size stuff, paws, maws, hypno, and overall more dominant, less wholesome vibe). Should I just be unfiltered?
I suppose it's also been a bit of a touchy issue with myself- because I view the stuff I post on twitter as not quite NSFW, but also not exactly something I'd want a 13-year-old to see. I sort of posted a disclaimer that I think of my account as PG-13, meaning there won't be anything worse than you'd see in a Marvel movie. But with how much my content delves into the fetishy side, I think perhaps that's in bad taste. But, to be fair, Disney's Robinhood is fetish content central - and it's rated G!
I don't know. I am not sure what it is I want, or what I'm trying to say or do here.
Do you have any thoughts or advice? If you've been interacting with me from the beginning, I would really appreciate your insight. Even if you haven't - you've likely seen a bit of a shift over the last few years. What do you think? I appreciate any observations or wisdom you may have to share.
I also think it's perfectly valid for a sona to essentially evolve alongside the person behind it. Taking things in a new direction might feel odd for some viewers who are used to a character being a certain way, but i think at the end of the day, your sona should reflect who you are, first and foremost!
Also, making people flustered is pretty based :V
Characteristics and priorities of yourself might shift / evolve the more you get to know yourself and so can those of your sona, if you want them to at least. If you discovered your dominant side, enjoy it and like to show it on artworks, then go for it. That doesn't mean that all of your prior artworks don't exist or take away something from your sona and how others are seeing it.
If you allow me to include an example with my sona:
I also prefer Rayu to be seen as the gentle, helping, supporting but sometimes also teasy macro. However, I also have a form for his evil, more beast-like, destructive and no-moral-at-all side which I also like to show around sometimes. The conflict with that? Both are entirely different and I can't really control what impression Rayu gives others or how he's seen by others anymore. However, it does help me out with managing and getting out my own feelings sometimes which is, what I prefer.
Should you filter your profile? I can't give you a "right" or "wrong" way or suggestion here, that is fully up to you. Some people can manage to handle multiple accounts and switching them depending on whats gonna be uploaded, while others can't. Some people don't mind to follow another account, while others prefer to just follow an "all-in-one" account. There is no perfect way here.
After a while, I was just like "Well, okay, screw it. One account for everything, even the favs". There might not be much uploaded on my profile, but I just created separate folders for different types of uploads. Fursuiting is a folder, artworks I scribble from time to time are are folder, commissions are divided in folders as well, depending on which sona is on the artwork. So if people want to see something specific, they can do so via the folders (or hashtags on other platforms maybe). And if you feel uncertain, you can always add a possible NSFW warning on your profile or recommend people to be, say, at least 16 years old to view all the contents on your profile.
That comment got a bit longer as planned, sorry about that. Hopefully I could help you out with some things on your mind and wasn't talking too much around the whole issue or about me. This was not my intention 😅