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Three quarters remaining
2 years ago
It's been six days since I announced my impending departure from the furry community. One quarter of the days between then and the date of my departure have elapsed. I thought it would be appropriate to give an update on how I'm doing.
As much as I appreciate the support I've received from everyone, I still believe that a total exit is the right thing to do. From the moment I made the decision to leave, it was like my life magically got better. I wasn't improving by leaps and bounds, but I was able to take important steps that I struggled with, and I felt optimistic about my future for the first time in years.
I even found more enjoyment in porn as something I chose to engage with, rather than something I did on autopilot. Unfortunately, the moment I relapsed into masturbating more frequently is the moment that keeping up the good decisions about my life got much harder. If the past six days has been any indicator of how the next 18 will go, I take it as proof that I made the right decision.
That doesn't mean I've not taken your comments on board. Some of you suggest I merely hand over the accounts to a friend and lock myself out instead of purging them. I'll consider it, but I remind you that virtually everything I've commissioned can be found in my archives on the Discord server.
What I will do is phase out certain aspects of my porn consumption gradually with each six day milestone. Today, I'll wipe my local save of the phone archive. At the halfway mark, I'll sign out of my accounts on mobile. For the last quarter, I'll save everything to a folder on my computer and compress it. Finally, on the due date, I'll sign out of FurAffinity and e621, delete my other furry accounts, and purge the archives from the internet.
I'm also going to retire from making my own sexually explicit work. I find it only feeds into my worst impulses. Maybe I'll see what I can finish before the deadline, but I personally do not wish to expend my creative energy on making pornography. I want to develop creative skills in a worksafe context. I'll only consider using those skills for porn when they come as naturally to me as writing.
Thank you again for showing support over the past week, but I remain convinced that this exit is something I need to do. Even if I completely kick my bad habits, I'll miss the people of the community.
https://discord.com/invite/XtWJMqsg
As much as I appreciate the support I've received from everyone, I still believe that a total exit is the right thing to do. From the moment I made the decision to leave, it was like my life magically got better. I wasn't improving by leaps and bounds, but I was able to take important steps that I struggled with, and I felt optimistic about my future for the first time in years.
I even found more enjoyment in porn as something I chose to engage with, rather than something I did on autopilot. Unfortunately, the moment I relapsed into masturbating more frequently is the moment that keeping up the good decisions about my life got much harder. If the past six days has been any indicator of how the next 18 will go, I take it as proof that I made the right decision.
That doesn't mean I've not taken your comments on board. Some of you suggest I merely hand over the accounts to a friend and lock myself out instead of purging them. I'll consider it, but I remind you that virtually everything I've commissioned can be found in my archives on the Discord server.
What I will do is phase out certain aspects of my porn consumption gradually with each six day milestone. Today, I'll wipe my local save of the phone archive. At the halfway mark, I'll sign out of my accounts on mobile. For the last quarter, I'll save everything to a folder on my computer and compress it. Finally, on the due date, I'll sign out of FurAffinity and e621, delete my other furry accounts, and purge the archives from the internet.
I'm also going to retire from making my own sexually explicit work. I find it only feeds into my worst impulses. Maybe I'll see what I can finish before the deadline, but I personally do not wish to expend my creative energy on making pornography. I want to develop creative skills in a worksafe context. I'll only consider using those skills for porn when they come as naturally to me as writing.
Thank you again for showing support over the past week, but I remain convinced that this exit is something I need to do. Even if I completely kick my bad habits, I'll miss the people of the community.
https://discord.com/invite/XtWJMqsg
PS - Would you happen to have an invite spare to that server?