Off and on chemo for six months coming up. Trying to get all my medical crap sorted before I go back to work and before we move. I'm not entirely sure how things are going to go. Depression has been kicking up again, not fond of that. I was put on a mood stabilizer that caused swelling and the resident Psych tried to say it was a blood clot (it wasn't. 2 or so odd hours in the ER just to be told I'm fine. A nightmare for me, because I don't want to be a bother, and I feel like this makes me a bother. Only saving grace was the fact that the particular ER was basically empty AF). And.....I got put on abilify, which has me cranky and irritable. No idea what that means for me. I'm scared that spravato is the only thing that works. Which there are alternatives, just straight up ketamine, but still.....that can be difficult to get.


I somehow gained weight between radiation and chemo. It might have had something to do with my particular brand of anemia, though I don't really know for sure. I do know the hunger stopped after 2lbs of blue rare steak after I finished chemo. Coincidence, idk.

Unfortunately, my left hand has been effected by all of this. Sometimes shaking, sometimes not. I have a lot of ideas and plans, and this may entail a bit of a pivot in what all I do. Time will tell in this regard.

I've been back and forth on thinking of uploading commissions I've gotten for YEARS now. I might start just because I feel stagnant and I'm bored. Maybe see if it helps inspire me. So watch out for that. There will be a specific folder for those.