So, to keep a long story brief, right around the end of 2022, I was no longer living in the state of Arizona. I had to give up the life I spent almost ten years establishing because I could not afford a place on my own. At the suggestion of my family, I moved out to central Oklahoma.

It has been the biggest mistake I have ever made.

I've struggled to find stable work here, most jobs paying very little, or offering few hours, or on the opposite end of the spectrum, being sun-up to sun-down jobs of hard labor. My first car having been paid off was totaled by a tornado back in April 2023 after leaving it overnight at my parents' to swap out the alternator. I had to fight tooth and nail for a loan just to get a replacement, and now stuck paying even more for an ultimately inferior car.

Now I find myself in a similar predicament of not being able to afford a home, this time in unfamiliar territory. I'm literally at my wit's end as any effort to try and better my situation is met with almost comedic levels of pushback.

I really don't know what to do anymore. I hate it here. I hate the helplessness I feel. I can't count on my family. I'm tired of fighting for an opportunity that just isn't here...

I just want to live.

I'll probably delete this later. Lack of sleep has not been helping. Thanks for reading and hopefully understanding in any case...