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Breaking Cycles
a year ago
Being in a cycle, problematic or not, is like being around the most reliable companions you've ever had. They're always there. You know when they're going to arrive, when they're going to leave, and what they're going to do.
It's reliable.
It's almost comfortable.
Why do you think it's so hard to break a cycle once you've been set in one? The mental rut is not just a physical neural thing, it is its own reward. The self-fulfilling prophecy, the knowledge of your fate, the lack of uncertainty: the cycle fulfills all of that and more.
To break a cycle means breaking off from all that familiarity. It means giving up on things that you're used to. It means you may never have any of those things again. And sometimes, that makes a bad cycle even harder to break. Because that can be the only certainty you have.
But here's the thing.
Uncertainty is scary...but it's also boundless. It has no shape. It's up to you to put a shape to it. And wouldn't you like that power for the first time in your life?
I know I do. I don't know what life I'm making, but it's mine, now.
Make your life your own. It is SO worth it.
It's reliable.
It's almost comfortable.
Why do you think it's so hard to break a cycle once you've been set in one? The mental rut is not just a physical neural thing, it is its own reward. The self-fulfilling prophecy, the knowledge of your fate, the lack of uncertainty: the cycle fulfills all of that and more.
To break a cycle means breaking off from all that familiarity. It means giving up on things that you're used to. It means you may never have any of those things again. And sometimes, that makes a bad cycle even harder to break. Because that can be the only certainty you have.
But here's the thing.
Uncertainty is scary...but it's also boundless. It has no shape. It's up to you to put a shape to it. And wouldn't you like that power for the first time in your life?
I know I do. I don't know what life I'm making, but it's mine, now.
Make your life your own. It is SO worth it.
I know I'll get there as long as I put in even a little bit everyday. Does the uncertainty scare me? Of course. But seeing where stagnation is getting me scares me even further.
Even in good relationships it's supposed to be a reciprocal thing. Better together, or at least happy even if it's not supposed to feel about 'being even'/ 'score'. Ex: Being together with a friend to a skate park, or having fun at a pool/beach. Or you're going on a cruise, but the ticket is for 2, and you have to pay the same price, so why not as well bring a friend/partner to tag along and have fun?
But bad/soured relationships might leave people trapped in cycles they might be unsure / afraid to be around the other, than happy. Even if someone might be fine to be kinda knowingly kinky in a relationship or provide. Reducing someone to just a 'sex organ' or 'money/ a womb' can be kinda hole puncturing. Taking people even out of fantasy vs irl horror re enactments.
Shit in life happens. And sadly sometimes even people you grew up with as babbling kids end up on different roads. Sometimes by accident. Sometimes by mistake. Sometimes on purpose.
People tend to wish most for what they want most. The richest man might wish that they had more friends, The one with the most might have wished they could have cared for them all or kept all. The poorest man might have wished they could have been either of the above.
I think you plant great thoughts though. I gotta admit i think i've seen some heart ripping scenes sprinkled though media. Hate is loud, kindness is often silent.
The Good Kid band made a pretty heart touching video about self care this year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtyXoZ8LTHs
About someone who ripped them apart to keep up a facade. Struggling to build up the perfect images as they claw out their chest, trying desperately to cling on . Though all the pain, at first it destroys them, but then the pain heals them. While it’s just them in the video, I think it might be fair to ask ourselves at times, “Do we ever ripping ourselves apart, hiding all the pain and scars, to pretend to be strong?”
Truth be told, im also worried about the younger generation. Even for all the drama, someone pointed out even the worst of things used to be “One day a year things”. Now the younger generations are exposed to even more vitriolic hate and hyper toxicity than ever before.
I do think it’s a good time to develop a thicker skin and proper caution than the past. But it's hard even with thick skin. And kids are growing up this year exposed to some of the worst people life had to offer.. Got given twitter hate megaphones for Elon to make a little more ad based revenue...