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The internet is stressful
a year ago
Hellooo
I don't usually post journals anymore like this, because I mean we got twitter for that right but... I'd rather just write long form today.
I recently discovered Cara and I was excited and made an account immediately, pressed post and found that... actually, this is just like twitter. In fact, it's just like tumblr, twitter, bluesky, instagram-feeds etc. I dreamt back to old DeviantArt and also thought about FA a while, and I realized back in the day I didn't get so much anxiety from the internet. And of course we're talking like 15 years ago.
I used to come home from school, do homework, eat dinner, all that jazz, and then log onto the family computer and check out everyone's new posts on dA. I didn't even spend that long, like 30-40 minutes opening up peoples art in new tabs, then interacting with each individually. You never got any BS twitter freakouts where the art disappears and you won't find it again, and you didn't get super distracted by the post above, the post below, or the BS on the side. You got to focus on the art as it is, and then interact with the post alone. Nothing else is there to try and grab your attention, maybe at worst the buttons at the top saying "browse", or the fav or download button on the side.
It didn't feel that stressful back then. I guess it also helps that you didn't have that insane pressure to post every single day as well. It kind of stresses me, the pressure to post every day and at certain times for the most interaction. Sometimes I forget to post all together because "oh damn, I missed the special time window" or "man, its Saturday/Sunday no one will click today. Guess I'll try on Monday".
Luckily, I still have the spark to draw and I kind of draw a lot actually, but I barely ever post it. I may DM it to a friend, a discord server maybe, and then that's it. Posting my art to Twitter, Bluesky, FA and now Cara? That's too many places for me. I wish I had at most only 2 places to post, but to keep being relevant we got to post everywhere. In fact I should post more finished stuff to r/furry as well, I mean... The times I'm best at posting is when I'm doing commissions, because all completed stuff goes into my "completed" tab in Trello, and I can use that tab as a guide for what I've posted already and what I haven't. Everything else kind of slips away.
Also, the internet has turned pretty sour. Blue checkmark people posting intentional rage bait, apparently a lot of the internets users are bots that try to stir shit up as well? I mean last night I got like 8 likes on a reply I made by 8 different Zoe bots... And of course the problems of the world are reaching my eyes as well, which they didn't before when I barely knew English enough to use DeviantArt when I was 11 in 2007.. lol. It's not that I don't care, it's more the frustration that I can't do anything about it. For my own mental health I have to try and avoid it, but it still reaches me one way or another.
I do miss the intense need to draw and post though. I remember being so excited to draw a new thing to post, and the intense feeling of excitement at practicing something specific or studying something for art. I do this still but its more of a chore than something I'm super hyped to do. It feels like the internet has ruined me a bit. I do still get the same feeling for commissions somehow, but its less intense than it used to be.
end rant, sorry for typos (I hope they are funny) kiss mwah
I don't usually post journals anymore like this, because I mean we got twitter for that right but... I'd rather just write long form today.
I recently discovered Cara and I was excited and made an account immediately, pressed post and found that... actually, this is just like twitter. In fact, it's just like tumblr, twitter, bluesky, instagram-feeds etc. I dreamt back to old DeviantArt and also thought about FA a while, and I realized back in the day I didn't get so much anxiety from the internet. And of course we're talking like 15 years ago.
I used to come home from school, do homework, eat dinner, all that jazz, and then log onto the family computer and check out everyone's new posts on dA. I didn't even spend that long, like 30-40 minutes opening up peoples art in new tabs, then interacting with each individually. You never got any BS twitter freakouts where the art disappears and you won't find it again, and you didn't get super distracted by the post above, the post below, or the BS on the side. You got to focus on the art as it is, and then interact with the post alone. Nothing else is there to try and grab your attention, maybe at worst the buttons at the top saying "browse", or the fav or download button on the side.
It didn't feel that stressful back then. I guess it also helps that you didn't have that insane pressure to post every single day as well. It kind of stresses me, the pressure to post every day and at certain times for the most interaction. Sometimes I forget to post all together because "oh damn, I missed the special time window" or "man, its Saturday/Sunday no one will click today. Guess I'll try on Monday".
Luckily, I still have the spark to draw and I kind of draw a lot actually, but I barely ever post it. I may DM it to a friend, a discord server maybe, and then that's it. Posting my art to Twitter, Bluesky, FA and now Cara? That's too many places for me. I wish I had at most only 2 places to post, but to keep being relevant we got to post everywhere. In fact I should post more finished stuff to r/furry as well, I mean... The times I'm best at posting is when I'm doing commissions, because all completed stuff goes into my "completed" tab in Trello, and I can use that tab as a guide for what I've posted already and what I haven't. Everything else kind of slips away.
Also, the internet has turned pretty sour. Blue checkmark people posting intentional rage bait, apparently a lot of the internets users are bots that try to stir shit up as well? I mean last night I got like 8 likes on a reply I made by 8 different Zoe bots... And of course the problems of the world are reaching my eyes as well, which they didn't before when I barely knew English enough to use DeviantArt when I was 11 in 2007.. lol. It's not that I don't care, it's more the frustration that I can't do anything about it. For my own mental health I have to try and avoid it, but it still reaches me one way or another.
I do miss the intense need to draw and post though. I remember being so excited to draw a new thing to post, and the intense feeling of excitement at practicing something specific or studying something for art. I do this still but its more of a chore than something I'm super hyped to do. It feels like the internet has ruined me a bit. I do still get the same feeling for commissions somehow, but its less intense than it used to be.
end rant, sorry for typos (I hope they are funny) kiss mwah
I don't know if there's much of a way around it. People are just spread out across so many platforms now. Which I'm sure is a good thing, in some way, but I know it's tough for creators.
Twitter... I mean, X is, for all intents and purposes, an elitist's personal platform to spread lies and disinformation, under the banner of saving free speech, when he's doing exactly the opposite. Which is reason enough for me to abandon the idea of having any meaningful presence on there.
You don't actually have to obey the rules that social medias artificially impose on you to gain popularity, or garner a following. They want your interactions above all else, so that they can profit off the data harvested from your behavior.
In reality, if you establish your own schedule, timeframe, whatever, you'll get real people with real interest in what you do.
For myself, I write short stories that I want to write, and while I rarely have anyone commissioning me anything nowadays, but when I was streaming, I was getting commissioned regularly and it felt awesome! I could stream at any time of the day and people came in the chat sometimes to only say hi, catch up, or stay for the whole time and enjoy watching my working process live!
The motivation to go for easily six hours a day came easy, and time flew by so fast that I rarely noticed how long I've been working tirelessly.
I don't upload my own material very often on FA, but I always feel a deep sense of pride when I decide to share a thing I wrote. Faves and comments are a bonus in my eyes, an acknowledgement that someone has taken notice of me.
All in all, carve your own path to success regardless of whatever anyone tells you. Failure is an opportunity to learn! Giving up equals defeat.
I wish I had more energy to spend on going through my sub box here, or the front page. Although an interaction from someone would probably make someone else happy on here, it also feels like I should rather do that on some other, less convenient platform than FA. Like I've been doing it a bit on bluesky with deck.blue and its a lot easier there than twitter, and a lot more fun, too! (using furryli.st) but it also feels like "eugh the twitter look messes with me".
I hope I can remember to post my most recent stuff tomorrow or the day after lol
The fact you have an ever growing list of blocked accounts on Twitter should be evidence enough that the platform has become a dumpster fire not worth spending any time having a presence on.
If you feel like social medias are what will make you successful, then by all means, go right ahead. I won't stop you. But I will say that you'll always be chasing that 15 minutes of fame, without ever obtaining it. You'll burn yourself out, along with any motivation for art you currently have.
You can probably already feel the effect of what I'm talking about.
Social medias are more often than not, run by bad people with only profit on their mind. Take FaceBook for example. The Zuck went in front of congress to plea for more internet security and policing. Yet, FaceBook gathers immense amounts of personal information... and there's a serious history of teens on instagram doing things I dare not mention.
Any well managed and responsible team behind a social media wouldn't let their baby get taken over by some of the most disgusting things humans can say to other humans with impunity.
At any rate, you are free to do what you think is best for you.
Just recently deleted my instagram and facebook. Although instagram is great for some extra reach, the meta AI stuff I wasn't on board with. I only used facebook to talk to two people who have promised to use telegram or discord instead, and thats about it. People say there's no point deleting their instagram cus they've already taken all your content for their AI dataset, but staying to me tells Meta that "yea boi please take my content so long as I get to use your website", which isn't true at all. People staying despite this is just condoning this shit. It's kinda like forced nfts. NFTs died off because it wasn't entangled like this in our shit, the AI thing may seem popular just cus people refuse to stop using popular socmed sites.
All in all, most popular socmed like twitter, facebook and instagram sucks the life out of me. I feel better using bluesky instead of twitter. I deleted two of them and one is on the verge of being yeeted as well, even though it'd suck to lose all that reach when it comes to commissions.
Your art is really good. And I've been meaning to reach you for a while, but haven't because reasons. ^^;
I post to friends discord servers more than anywhere else now and it's chill. I also miss feeling excited to share fanworks..talk about OC's, excitedly roleplay etc. I feel old as fuck saying all this LOL. I don't blame you for avoiding current tensions. I have been as active as I can stomach to share new news, hopeful stories, progress etc. I don't know, it's all shit. I hope it gets better for us all. Until then I really appreciate Furaffinity since it's the most 'old school deviantart' we got. Hell, I remember how much people would get upset it hasn't been updated at all since 2005, or some crazy number but now that's kinda charming in its own way.
Anyways- I sure be rambling LOL. Do you, for all it's worth. Keep being passionate about what you love and share what you're able. I'm sorry that algorithm BS makes your free time a second job right now- it's absolutely ass. Much love to you.
I was a bit surprised to see Cara doesn't allow nsfw 🤔
I feel like watchers/followers are also a bit burnt out by all this. If I go back in my gallery to like, pre 2016 I used to get lots of comments but not as much anymore. I totally understand though. If everyone feels the same or similar to me I especially get it, whew..
But I know Postybirb is meant to help with a lot of scheduling to post and posts to all the places for you. I don't know how difficult it is to use as I haven't done so myself, but I've heard it's meant to be a huge help for posting in different places all at the same time P: doesn't help for the rest though. I know what you mean, I loved the internet back when I was younger, now it feels like you have to step on glass =/