FA+
Shop
Why I ended Lost in Regression, and How It Would've Gone
a year ago
CONTENT WARNING: This journal is going to discuss depression and suicide. Though, if you were reading Lost in Regression as I uploaded it, you probably already knew that.
In the journal where I said I was putting a hold on LiR, I said that I was in a much better place. That was just a straight-up lie lol. To you, to my friends, and to myself (and I actually believed it). True, I wasn't actively suicidal anymore, but the bar to clear for that is on the fuckin' ground. It's only now that I realize this, but the truth is, I had begun to just shut down emotionally. I was isolating myself. I was removing myself from things that brought me joy, and that included both drawing and feeling little, both things that were kind of crucial for making Lost in Regression. It wasn't until just a couple months ago that I started to open myself up emotionally and talk to people again.
HOW LOST IN REGRESSION WAS GOING TO GO:
I've created a Google Doc with the pages of Lost in Regression that I've been sitting on for the past few years. I had originally storyboarded a total of 88 pages, and even rendered a few that were never uploaded. Here's the link if you want to read the rest of Lost in Regression and learn how I planned the ending.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/.....it?usp=sharing
In the journal where I said I was putting a hold on LiR, I said that I was in a much better place. That was just a straight-up lie lol. To you, to my friends, and to myself (and I actually believed it). True, I wasn't actively suicidal anymore, but the bar to clear for that is on the fuckin' ground. It's only now that I realize this, but the truth is, I had begun to just shut down emotionally. I was isolating myself. I was removing myself from things that brought me joy, and that included both drawing and feeling little, both things that were kind of crucial for making Lost in Regression. It wasn't until just a couple months ago that I started to open myself up emotionally and talk to people again.
HOW LOST IN REGRESSION WAS GOING TO GO:
I've created a Google Doc with the pages of Lost in Regression that I've been sitting on for the past few years. I had originally storyboarded a total of 88 pages, and even rendered a few that were never uploaded. Here's the link if you want to read the rest of Lost in Regression and learn how I planned the ending.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/.....it?usp=sharing
While it hurt a lot to make that comic (probably way more than it did reading it), I hope that it helped do either some form of introspection, or catharsis.
You're a good kittenbot.
And while I didn't know Becca, something tells me that wherever she might be, she's looking at you with pride. As any true parent would.
Also: good job on NEARLY getting a tear out of me. Closest I've been from anything since... gosh, years now.
That is a testament to how good a storyteller you are, if you ask me.
Just finished reading the Google Doc. It was beautiful. It really pulls on the heart.
it might have taken you longer to heal than you expected, but try not to beat yourself up for it. you went through something traumatic, and you still got back up and worked towards getting better.
you're doing amazing, kid (: be proud of all your efforts!! thank you for sharing such an emotional story with us.
Also... That was a powerful reading. It felt so personal and hard. You're a really great storyteller, and i can guarantee your works are not only therapeutic to you, but to everyone that follows it. Thanks so much for sharing.
;sends hugs;
Glad you are recovering, glad you are back.
I can see why it was so hard to continue it but i hope at least having it all done helped some in a tiny little way, thanks hugely for sharing it with us it was still a fantastic if very emotionally invested read.