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Separation
11 months ago
It is confirmed that I will be separating from my partner and best friend.
This is an incredibly hard thing, something I wish was not happening... This account has a lot of association with them, so I'm unsure if I will be moving back to my original
dracotic account or not, yet. There's so many things I've kept quiet and not shared with them. They now identify as plural and Therian, both things which I have held close to me for many years and we never really talked about it. I want them to be happy, and if happiness is not what they are experiencing with me, I can't beg and plead anymore. I just need to realize that I destroyed something beautiful and I have to live the rest of my life without them.
"Am I part of the cure, or am I part of the disease." -Clocks by Cold Play.
This quote has followed me for many, many years. In these moments, it emerges from the depths and reminds me of who I am and my role in relationships. What feels like help and care is what eventually pushes people away.
I want to keep fighting for something that is already gone. I love them so much, in so many ways. I've just ruined everything. I am the biggest mistake of my life.
This is an incredibly hard thing, something I wish was not happening... This account has a lot of association with them, so I'm unsure if I will be moving back to my original
dracotic account or not, yet. There's so many things I've kept quiet and not shared with them. They now identify as plural and Therian, both things which I have held close to me for many years and we never really talked about it. I want them to be happy, and if happiness is not what they are experiencing with me, I can't beg and plead anymore. I just need to realize that I destroyed something beautiful and I have to live the rest of my life without them."Am I part of the cure, or am I part of the disease." -Clocks by Cold Play.
This quote has followed me for many, many years. In these moments, it emerges from the depths and reminds me of who I am and my role in relationships. What feels like help and care is what eventually pushes people away.
I want to keep fighting for something that is already gone. I love them so much, in so many ways. I've just ruined everything. I am the biggest mistake of my life.
Most all of us who have fallen out of a relationship have been where you are now, some of us several times.
I'm not a psychologist, just someone who's been there before. For me, learning to be content by myself was my answer. Sometime after I believed this to be true and behaved as such, I found someone who found this emotional strength and independence attractive. A new relationship formed, a different one, joyful and fulfilling in its own unique way.
Let your grief run it's course. Just remember to let it go when it starts to drift away.
Maybe do some nice things for yourself when you can.
Or go do an activity you love.
Love you always and you know we're here for you. 🫂🐉