Okay here's the rundown of my life over the past several months. This may sound like a woe-is-me sob journal but let me assure you that it's not. I feel I owe an explaination to anyone still keeping tabs on my art and those who I still owe art to.

So here it is. Be warned: this will be a lengthy journal. If you don't care, don't read. If you do, thanks so much for your understanding.

During the last year or so Ive been noticing that I have lost touch with myself. I don't have any goals, academically or otherwise, beyond passing school. Infailed my first term of university (the school I'm attending was a college but it recently upgraded it's status) and, though I tried really hard to get grades I needed At first I still found myself very unmotivated to do anything. I pay $200/ month for piano lessons that I don't practice for (and at gr9 level that isn't a smart thing to do) and I find myself lacking things I enjoy. My sketchbook hasn't been touched since October. I don't play instruments that I used to love playin in high school. Even videogames are played briefly so I can tell customers at work what they are about.

I know some people are going to tell me I'm depressed, etc. Sometimes it feels like it. Tuere are nights where i will sit and cry but not because i think im a failure but because i honestly dont know where i stand in life. But those tend to be few and far between. Thank god my boyfriend of five years is so patient with me. Without him to keep me sane things could be worse.

But I wouldn't say i'm depressed, just going through an identity crisis.

The reason behind my lack of art and impending hiatus is my complete lack of motivation to start or finish a picture. I was hoping the Halloween stuff would help but it didn't. I've had people ask me why I do requests instead of commissions. Lately I can't rely on myself do do art. Lack of inspiration and the lack or the need to draw tie into that. I don't believe in forcing art out when I'm not able to put 100% effort into it. It usually leads to even poorer results and lack of satisfaction with my art. I also don't feel that my art is good enough to charge people for it.

Until I figure stuff out in my life I likely won't be doing much drawing. I'm sorry for those who have been waiting for a while only to get disappointed. At this point I think it's only fair to cancel the requests rather than keeping people waiting. Please forgive me.

I likely won't be around much on FA. I might post up the ocasional doodle, but nothing too large.

Sorry if this journal doesn't make a lot of sense LOL. It's almost 5am and I haven't slept yet.

If you want to still keep in touch my msn is tropicxbreeze[at]gmail.com and I have been playing wow too with an 80 belf hunter called Deysong on the exodar (US) server.

Thanks for listening and I'm sorry for any inconviniences I have caused

Shiko