All names have been redacted and censored to abide by FA's terms of service. Please, if you know this individual do not "hunt" them down. Simply block. If you wish to help, support me. I do not condone witch hunts or call out posts. Before I begin, please let me be transparent about my needs.

Emergency Housing.
Food.
Medication.
Toiletries and female sanitary products.

$80 will secure me one night in the cheapest motel in my area.

Long term needs if possible.
Bond for housing.
A bed/fridge.
Postage to send back my belongings.

TLDR; Uprooted my life and moved to the USA in December. I rehomed my pets, sold all my belongings and left my country behind to marry who I thought was going to be my husband. Only for my partner to abuse me and be having an affair two months in. I fled the country due to domestic violence leaving me homeless in Australia.

(John Doe) from the beginning had completely isolated me from all my friends. The wonderful community that you see before you. They would tell me who I could and couldn't talk too, who I could reply too, when I was allowed to be on discord and would ask religiously to see my chat logs. Asking me to open each message, going through them and picking it apart. They would monitor timestamps and my online activity. I had to have our chat opened at all times even if he was busy. I no longer appeared online with my status because he could see when I was voice chatting/playing games with other people and got extremely possessive. He stopped me from doing the things I once enjoyed. I no longer did book club with friends because of his jealously. I stopped voice chatting on servers publicly, getting NSFW art with people, ERPing and so on. He was very vocal that it was a make or break for us in our relationship. I decided that he was worth it, so I gave up those things. Because I genuinely loved him. But his thirst for control over me got worse as time progressed. I could no longer post other people's NSFW art or favourite NSFW art on FA. I stopped going to the gym and doing basic errands because he would treat me poorly for leaving him by himself. I couldn't be left alone. I had to take him with me everywhere on my headphones so he could listen in on what I was doing with my errands. It was extremely uncomfortable and embarrassing for me but it wanted him to feel comfortable, happy and reassured.

You are probably wondering why? Why am I saying this now? And why am I sharing it publicly? It's because they have stripped away everything from me and I am a husk of the person I once was. Most of you have noticed a massive change in my online activity and presence. That is because of (John Doe). When we first met they knew my situation and they promised me the world. To look after and provide for me. Now they have left me with nothing.

Even before we started dating. I have had several people come to me worried about red flags they had exhibited towards me before we were officially dating. He unfriended me multiple times for no reason (we barely knew each other at this point) and he walked away from the friendship. I respected his wishes of no contact and muted his notifications. At this point I was grieving our friendship and he did the most extreme thing he could possibly think of for me to break that no contact. He sent me his life savings on PayPal and told me he was going to kill himself because he didn't want to live in a world where I wasn't in his. Even though he was the one who walked away. Obviously this sent me into a full blown panic attack and I broke that no contact. It resulted in me having to be admitted to hospital due to my underlying lung issues. He promised afterwards to several people that he would do his best to never put me through anything like that ever again and to cherish me for the amazing person that I am. After his episode I of course sent the money back but the damage was done and it was the start of a long, tiring battle for me.

Countless times throughout our relationship I have forgiven him for dangerous and abusive behaviour. Drinking and driving. Texting while driving. Flirting behind my back. Lying etc I am quick to forgive but not to forget. Before he visited me here in Australia I voiced some serious concerns to my therapist about him visiting. She stepped away and came back saying that what I had told her about (John Doe) is considered a domestic violence relationship and that she had to talk with her manager. She recommended he should not visit in fears for my safety. Against all advice I decided to go ahead with it anyway.

(John Doe) visited me last year in July. After his visit to Australia I got extremely sick and found out I was pregnant. I was around 5-6 weeks pregnant when I sadly miscarriaged. I was in a lot of pain and mentally not okay. There wasn't anything they could do since it was such an early stage pregnancy. All I could do was try and manage the pain at home while passing the tissue. I have never been pregnant before. He told me not to tell anyone because it was between us. No friends, family, no one. So I kept silent and dealt with this loss on my own. I had zero support. This was a occurring theme in our relationship, that any issues we had between us I could not vent or confide in anyone. He labelled it as "airing our dirty laundry" but I believe he was worried that others will truly see the type of person that he is. The behaviour and treatment towards me was downright abusive. During all of this (John Doe) had been trialling different mood stabiliser medications to see what worked for them. They were having a hard time adjusting and would say things like "That wasn't the real me. I was unmedicated" to which, although what they did was wrong I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt for this toxic behaviour. Them constantly switching medications was a nightmare for me but I desperately wanted them to get better so I tried to excuse it and ride it out.

We had some issues with boundaries and a couple of people were unfortunately muddled in with that. They wished to not be involved with our drama, which is understandable. It resulted in them leaving and unfriending (John Doe). Loosing friends is always tough but loosing the man you were supposed to marry is tougher. (John Doe) ended our engagement over a individual they had known for less than two weeks. Five weeks before I was bound to leave to the USA. They told me it was my fault and that if I didn’t fix it, I didn’t make them come back we we're done. I didn't realise our relationship was that fragile that a mere stranger could have that much power. I tried to talk to them about it with open communication but they refused. This resulted in me attempting to take my own life and being admitted to hospital. I had nothing left as I sat in an empty house. They were more concerned about the loss of their friends than our relationship and me. Someone dear to me tried to mediate the situation because (John Doe) wouldn't listen to reason. At this point even though they back peddled and said we were still together they refused to take any accountability for what had happened. None what so ever. It was all on me. It didn't feel right. I apologised to try and keep the peace. But ultimately I buckled and bent because my worst fear is fear of abandonment. He knows this. I was grovelling, begging, pleading with him not to leave me because I had given him everything.

There was a massive financial gap between us as I am disabled both mentally and physically, I was on a small fixed income by the government. It is extremely hard to save. Where as he is very well off, owns his own home, has a mustang, had tons of savings and a good paying job. I was unable to do much in regards to finances with a immigration lawyer, flights and moving. Anything I did have left over I tried to best to pitch in and spoil (John Doe) with art, food and so on. There came a point where his/our savings were dwindling quickly due to the process of me moving. It isn't cheap. He begun to express his frustration with me about the costs and how I wasn't contributing. That he was going to sell all of his guitars and exchange his car. (he never did anything of those things) The pressure of this was causing a rift in our relationship and I decided to give up the biggest asset I had in my life. My fursona, Opal. At first they said I shouldn't but after hearing the price tag they quickly changed their mind. I was no longer using her for art, roleplay etc due to his demands so I thought why not? This way I was able to contribute and have a steady stream of income coming in for quite sometime. This in itself was a bad idea. But I was willing to do anything for him and he took advantage of that.

To avoid paypal fees we mutually decided the best course of action would be for him to have the money transferred to his bank account. As the buyer is also in America. I do not and never had access to this account. Every fortnight they would receive a cheque in the mail for a sum of money, occasionally the buyer would send extra. (John Doe) did not notify me of the amount so I could keep track of payments. When I expressed my concern they exclaimed that they were taking care of it and not to worry about numbers. Occasionally I would need that money for food, medical expenses and just everyday things when I lived in Australia. At first they were happy to send me the money as needed but over time they became annoyed any time I asked. I felt on edge having to ask for my own money. I had been shipping my belongings over to America which is very costly, I had been doing it overly several months. Each box was around $100 or more so I would ask for help as I didn't have the funds to do so (that I had access too)

When our relationship begun to fall apart and I expressed that me leaving due to his actions WAS in fact an option. After hearing this he was on his best behaviour. He said that there were no more restrictions or rules and I could do whatever I wished. But this was a loaded comment and I knew they were baiting me. It was a test. He had instilled so much fear and anxiety in me over time that even though he said I could go ahead and do certain things, I couldn't.

I arrived in America on the 7th of December 2024. That joyfullness quickly turned into sorrow and despair. The house was not prepared for me. There was no furniture, no essentials like towels or bedding. It was filled to the brim with junk and trash, both inside and out. It stunk of cat urine and feces. I was overwhelmed by it all and for the next month that's all I did. Clean. I cleaned so much that I developed contact dermatitis on both hands. (John Does) attitude towards me changed in the blink of an eye. He avoided me, wouldn't touch me or talk to me. He would become angry and frustrated with me for no reason. It left me feeling confused and unwanted. I would beg him to go out and do things together as a couple as I was new to the country and area but it was as if I was pulling teeth. He didn't want to do anything but stay home and play on his PC. The entire time I was here he was focused on his online friends, role-playing and sexting (which he could do but I wasn't, go figure) . It made me sick to my stomach seeing the messages light up on his wrist watch that I bought while I would hold his hand as he fucked someone else.

Christmas day was awful. My stocking was empty. I had bought a tree from amazon, put it up by myself because he refused to help and tucked all his presents under the tree from me. The day before Christmas he bought me a single necklace that didn't fit out of obligation, I cannot begin to tell you how hard I cried that day. Things didn't improve after Christmas, I was in a constant routine of cooking and cleaning. With no car, family or friends and new to the area I was confined to the house. My savings quickly depleted due to the currency exchange and my government no longer supported me with disability income.

I had accepted that this was my new norm. In a sexless, loveless relationship with (John Doe) in a new country. You accept the love you think you deserve. I was now completely invisible. He was treating me like garage and I couldn't figure out why. That was until one day, randomly while at work, he confessed to me about having an affair. He had known this woman for a year, but within the last month or so they had gotten back in contact. She too was married and knew about me. Neither of them cared. He was projecting his guilt onto me the entire time. But it wasn't just an affair, he claimed to love her and wanted us to "just be friends" after less than two months of me up rooting my life to come here. I was in shock, to put it lightly. I gave him an option. It was me or her. He couldn't have both. But he wanted both. He wanted me to stay, cook and clean for him while turning a blind eye so he could have his fun.

It wasn't until a mutual friend told him that he was making a huge mistake and to choose me. It baffles me that he needed someone to tell him that. But it seemed to work and they listened. I forgave him for his infidelity and things begun to seem brighter. For once he was treating me kindly but it was short lived. The reason he was treating me with kindness was because that mutual friend who was giving us relationship advise etc he was actively flirting and now in love with. This mutual friend stated many times that they too were married and that it wouldn't work. But that didn't stop (John Doe), as far as they were concerned they were in some sort of unofficial relationship. I could tell. They would be chatting constantly. Everytime he received a message he would perk up while actively ignoring my messages. He would get extremely upset when they needed to leave etc There was tension brewing in the air and one day while they were having a work meeting I looked through their discord. I saw messages like "I love you, I'm your man and second husband" as well as extremely explicit material. (John Doe) could not separate the digital world from the real world. I confronted (John Doe) about this and they once again confessed that they were in love with this person. (It had been a week since I found out about their affair and now they were in love with an entirely different person) They begged me to not confront our mutual friend. That it was all his fault, not theirs. Please let me be crystal clear that I do not blame nor am I angry at this mutual friend. In fact, it is the opposite. They have helped me greatly throughout this.

The cherry ontop of this ordeal was (John Doe) stated that they don't love me anymore. That they had a feeling but "didn't know for sure" till I moved to America. That they had stopped loving me before I moved. I asked them several times if they were sure before I got onto the plane, that there was no going back for me and they agreed. I wish they had been honest and given a choice to stay or go ahead. What's worse, a week before I left got a tattoo of their name along my finger as a sign and tribute to them of my devotion and love. Since, I knew NONE of this and thought we were getting married. He encouraged me to do this knowing he didn't love me. I now have his name etched into my skin. I have been abused, mislead, lied too, cheated on, humiliated and stripped of my identity.

He ended the relationship with me and wanted to remain friends. That we would marry for legal reasons for me to stay in the country but essentially all we would be is housemates. He begun pushing me to find someone else because at this point he had already moved on. I expressed my concerns to him, being disabled both mentally and physically that this arrangement he suggested would not be sustainable. I lacked independence in Australia due to my limitations and used support services, what made him think me being in America would be any different? Especially as a foreigner. (John Doe) begun to spiral, getting high and drunk almost daily as a coping mechanism. I was no longer safe. It was a dangerous situation. He came out and laid down next to me while drunk. I was like "Hey, uhh.. you are in my space right now.." he started laughing "there is no such thing as your space. This entire house is my space. I don't see you paying any bills. When are you leaving? I want you GONE" he was looking at me with manic eyes, glaring at me like he wanted to hurt me. I assured him I could leave ASAP. He told me to be gone by that weekend. He would cuss, scream, yell to himself and started slamming doors to make a point. (John Doe) would leave at 10am to go to the bar, get hammered drunk and drive home while intoxicated. He passed out on the bed black out drunk. It gave me time to get movers in, grab my shit and leave. He didn't even know I left till later that afternoon when he regained consciousness.

During to the lead up of me leaving I had been in contact with my support worker, the Embassy and many friends to plan my escape. (John Doe) had already tried several times to stop me from leaving. Which included locking the bedroom door where my passport was so I couldn't access my belongings. My support worker who had been working with me while I was living in Australia kept my file open due to the uneasiness they felt with me leaving. And boy, am I glad they did. With no savings left or income my friends graciously chipped in to help me to safety with flights and accommodation between layovers. I will forever be in their debt. What had taken me months to do previously, I managed to pack all my belongings in a single night and fled without a word. Five days earlier than he had anticipated. All of my boxed belongings are currently being stored with a trusted friend till I am able to secure housing and post them back.

With my safety plan in motion, I reached out to a local friend here in Australia explaining my situation. She reassured me that I could stay with her as long as I needed, no hassle. It wasn't much but she offered me a dog bed to sleep in on her lounge room floor (I'm not kidding, it was a dog bed) beggers cannot be choosers and I was in no position to decline so I took her up on this offer. I knew things were going to be rough for a while. I arrived back in Australia on the 5th of February. As soon as I arrived I immediately started the process to build back what I had lost. Even the simplest things you don't think about, like a phone provider. I had contacted my government services and explained my situation to try and receive some kind of help. That I had fled a DV relationship and I am now homeless. I was informed that because this all happened overseas, I did not qualify for any kind of DV help from them. Instead I received a one off small sum crisis payment. Regardless of this, I kept pushing forward with my support worker as they advocated for me. I applied for government housing, private rentals and shared accommodation. I set back up all my services and specialists. You name it.

Without any reason or word of warning the couple who were housing me told me to leave just shy over a week of me arriving back in Australia. They claimed that they had done all they could to help with housing me but they needed to respect their own boundries of space so I needed to leave immediately. That they just couldn't relax with me being there and it was costing them too much to house me. I was gobsmacked and frankly blindsided. We hadn't fought, I chipped in where I could for groceries and would clean up after everyone (dishes etc). They knew my situation and how vulnerable I was in this moment with no housing or income. I immediately contacted my support worker explaining the situation to which they told me that all emergency housing with link2home (homelessness service) was fully booked. That I needed to try and stay where I was over the weekend at the very least. I explained this to my friend and she reluctantly agreed to let me stay till Monday. Today I contacted link2home to try and secure any kind of emergency accommodation. I was informed that they had contacted my support worker with 3 days worth of emergency accommodation over the weekend (last week) in a trailer park, but since my worker didn't contact them the company paid for those 3 days. It was a breech of their TOS and they terminated my file, no longer able to support with me with emergency accommodation. It was gutwrenching. Such a simple mistake from my support worker has cost me housing. I have used what little funds I have left to book the cheapest motel in the area, I have three days paid. I'm still actively working with my support worker to find ANYTHING at this point. I will update as my situation progresses. As well as religiously refresh real estate web pages and apply for anything that pops up. I had tried my best to remain optimistic despite my situation. I knew there was a housing crisis in Australia. I'm forever in debt and grateful to my beloved friends who have helped me but it isn't sustainable and that help is running out. People have their own lives and families to look after.

Thank-you for taking the time to read this. I will be disabling comments as I am already incredibly overwhelmed with my situation as you can imagine. I haven't had any downtime to process anything that's transpired in the past three months. But your kind words and prayers are deeply appreciated. Please, if you yourself are in a similar situation do NOT donate. Take care of yourself and remember to never ever let someone snuff our your sparkle.

Google document evidence: https://drive.google.com/drive/fold.....o9?usp=sharing