Febuary Slump and Vent
7 months ago
This month... has been perhaps a rather rough one, between work, interpersonal conflicts, struggling to find time to be creative, and struggling to maintain contact with friends and those I care about.
I fear I've hurt and upset a lot of people I hold dear to me and I've gotten myself into a weird state of burnout and frustration.
It can be tough to keep pushing and keeping in contact with everyone you want to keep in touch with time and time again. Added to that, I have a lot of agreements, and obligations I've taken upon myself. Yet, I find it exceedingly hard to ask for help from friends and others when I am struggling. Don't want to be burden to anyone and really don't want anyone to feel like they need to take care of me. This leads to a lot of problems though because this just pushes people away...
It's often rather frustrating... I feel like I can't find a good balance between work, social, and creative lives. I want organization, but want the ability to be spontaneous. I want to be creative, but work sucks away so much of my mental energy. I want to be social, but I also want time to myself. My time management is abysmal because of ADHD and just Anxiety. Getting lost in something and getting super involved in it is both a blessing and curse. You get in depth with it, you really get to doing something with it, yet you lose track of time and the world around you. Others end up frustrated with that outcome, feeling as though you don't care about them. Yet you do, you want to make sure you're there for them, but you also want to achieve your own goals...
Additionally, I had a package I purchased that was not in anyway cheap. It was stolen from my front porch. The manufacturer, shipper, and courier all are refusing to take fault and I'm at a loss of what to do to recoup my monetary losses from the loss of this package. It's beyond frustrating, I expected the courier to take it to a secure point if they couldn't get me to sign off on it. Yet they didn't. I was at work and couldn't step away. All because of this, someone got the opportunity to rob me of it. I was so very excited to receive it, only to have that snatched from me the day I would've received it. I was decimated.
This month... has been rough and frustrating. I don't know what to change. I've been trying to improve, but I also feel kind of stuck with work, creative endeavors, and socially speaking.
In closing, It's been a rough month. Burnout is in full swing... and I'm just kind of dissatisfied with things as they are. I hope next month is better.
Thanks for listening to my thoughts and feelings.
Hope you're doing well.
I fear I've hurt and upset a lot of people I hold dear to me and I've gotten myself into a weird state of burnout and frustration.
It can be tough to keep pushing and keeping in contact with everyone you want to keep in touch with time and time again. Added to that, I have a lot of agreements, and obligations I've taken upon myself. Yet, I find it exceedingly hard to ask for help from friends and others when I am struggling. Don't want to be burden to anyone and really don't want anyone to feel like they need to take care of me. This leads to a lot of problems though because this just pushes people away...
It's often rather frustrating... I feel like I can't find a good balance between work, social, and creative lives. I want organization, but want the ability to be spontaneous. I want to be creative, but work sucks away so much of my mental energy. I want to be social, but I also want time to myself. My time management is abysmal because of ADHD and just Anxiety. Getting lost in something and getting super involved in it is both a blessing and curse. You get in depth with it, you really get to doing something with it, yet you lose track of time and the world around you. Others end up frustrated with that outcome, feeling as though you don't care about them. Yet you do, you want to make sure you're there for them, but you also want to achieve your own goals...
Additionally, I had a package I purchased that was not in anyway cheap. It was stolen from my front porch. The manufacturer, shipper, and courier all are refusing to take fault and I'm at a loss of what to do to recoup my monetary losses from the loss of this package. It's beyond frustrating, I expected the courier to take it to a secure point if they couldn't get me to sign off on it. Yet they didn't. I was at work and couldn't step away. All because of this, someone got the opportunity to rob me of it. I was so very excited to receive it, only to have that snatched from me the day I would've received it. I was decimated.
This month... has been rough and frustrating. I don't know what to change. I've been trying to improve, but I also feel kind of stuck with work, creative endeavors, and socially speaking.
In closing, It's been a rough month. Burnout is in full swing... and I'm just kind of dissatisfied with things as they are. I hope next month is better.
Thanks for listening to my thoughts and feelings.
Hope you're doing well.