2025 Update
8 months ago
I'm around. Kicking a can. Just going day to day.
Went to the doctor yesterday to get the ball rolling for physiology tests, but at least one of the blood work came back looking 95% all balanced (like 1 thing was outside normal range and 2 others were pushing towards being too low but still in the green). I'm starting to think I developed hypochondria and have been making this all up.
I do realize that I haven't been eating well enough. Like after a heavy meal I feel great in the morning and going into work, but if I feel a bit lazy and just settle for a TV dinner or some filler food like crackers I'm back to feeling horrible. The problem is I'm still eating 3 meals a day and getting protein from meat sources and sometimes plant sources (Lenny & Larry's Snickerdoodle cookies are fucking fantastic!) Just wish it was sustainable to have big meals for breakfast and dinner but we're talking $5-15 meals twice a day!
I will be trying to build some routines like working on game designs at least 10 minutes a day just to get started. Maybe even work in a few minutes of drawing here and there so long as my moods hold out. I've been having ideas for games and writing them out, it's just been a matter of having no energy to MAKE them. Pretty much just going to have to suck it up and just do it. Damn the sickness, damn the fatigue, damn the sleeplessness. I gave up drawing to pursue this route and I have NOTHING to show for it but dozens upon dozens of ideas and small tests but no actual prototypes or demos.
But that's my headspace. Nothing good still, just kinda pushing myself by my hindlegs and dragging the front half.
Went to the doctor yesterday to get the ball rolling for physiology tests, but at least one of the blood work came back looking 95% all balanced (like 1 thing was outside normal range and 2 others were pushing towards being too low but still in the green). I'm starting to think I developed hypochondria and have been making this all up.
I do realize that I haven't been eating well enough. Like after a heavy meal I feel great in the morning and going into work, but if I feel a bit lazy and just settle for a TV dinner or some filler food like crackers I'm back to feeling horrible. The problem is I'm still eating 3 meals a day and getting protein from meat sources and sometimes plant sources (Lenny & Larry's Snickerdoodle cookies are fucking fantastic!) Just wish it was sustainable to have big meals for breakfast and dinner but we're talking $5-15 meals twice a day!
I will be trying to build some routines like working on game designs at least 10 minutes a day just to get started. Maybe even work in a few minutes of drawing here and there so long as my moods hold out. I've been having ideas for games and writing them out, it's just been a matter of having no energy to MAKE them. Pretty much just going to have to suck it up and just do it. Damn the sickness, damn the fatigue, damn the sleeplessness. I gave up drawing to pursue this route and I have NOTHING to show for it but dozens upon dozens of ideas and small tests but no actual prototypes or demos.
But that's my headspace. Nothing good still, just kinda pushing myself by my hindlegs and dragging the front half.
FA+
