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Discovering my sexual identity.
7 months ago
Well, I don't really know how to Really start this journal, so I'll just get to the point.
Essentially, I feel more aversion to the idea of hornyness and sex now more than I ever have. I know this community is filled with hornyness and sex, and I also know there's a side to it that I am starting to resonate more and more with, that being the non-sexual side of this community.
A weird thing about myself in person is that I legit have never rubbed one out. Like, ever. That's how non-existent my sex drive is. And it genuinely tires me out when I have people only seeing my Sona, and not me, the person behind the Sona. I have had many people come to me asking to be my friend and then show to me that they only see me for something that can use to get themselves off, and it SUCKS.
So what am I going to do? I'm not sure. Maybe I'll create an alternative Sona or alternative version of Ren to really represent my asexuality, as I am just drained mentally. It's one of the reasons you have been seeing more SFW art of Ren and stuff than NSFW.
Thank you for reading this journal, it means alot if you did and you got something out of it.
-Ren
Essentially, I feel more aversion to the idea of hornyness and sex now more than I ever have. I know this community is filled with hornyness and sex, and I also know there's a side to it that I am starting to resonate more and more with, that being the non-sexual side of this community.
A weird thing about myself in person is that I legit have never rubbed one out. Like, ever. That's how non-existent my sex drive is. And it genuinely tires me out when I have people only seeing my Sona, and not me, the person behind the Sona. I have had many people come to me asking to be my friend and then show to me that they only see me for something that can use to get themselves off, and it SUCKS.
So what am I going to do? I'm not sure. Maybe I'll create an alternative Sona or alternative version of Ren to really represent my asexuality, as I am just drained mentally. It's one of the reasons you have been seeing more SFW art of Ren and stuff than NSFW.
Thank you for reading this journal, it means alot if you did and you got something out of it.
-Ren
If it helps, You're a good person from my experiences talking with you and whether you do more SFW or NSFW matters not to what I think of you. Don't be afraid to be yourself and try not to let the overly horny people ruin that!
....I'm not great at doing inspirational or reassuring comments/posts but I'm with you regardless of what you choose.
Honestly... I'm ace as well, surprising to most who find out... but my version of ace is more... I feel the urge, I like these things... but ACTUALLY performing them? Absolutely no desire to do such. I don't find anyone or anything attractive either, physically or emotionally... it's more the acts done in RP/Stories that gets me.
... long story short though, I completely understand. You aren't alone out there either <3
It can be a very... odd thing to get through one's head the idea of being a kinky ace -- interested in some kinks and fetishes, but not usually interested in.. well, you know.