FA+
Shop
Random rant about PTSD/Truama (Trigger Warning)
2 months ago
~One compassionate act can change someone else's day, that person passing on compassion to someone else can help change the world.~~Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.~ So, for the longest time I've had trauma and PTSD. Now since when I was a kid growing up, I felt like I couldn't have it since clearly I'm not a veteran and I was told a good chunk of my life by various people. Trauma only happens to veterans, first responders, and women who have survived some kind of abuse.
So I ask myself, do I have trauma then? Since I'm none of these, I mean I'm a male who has survived abuse but that doesn't count right? Because men who survive abuse, that's clearly not a thing. It only happens to women right? Society would like me to believe that. Society wants to tell me to "Grow the fuck up! Grow a pair! Be a fucking man and suck it up!" Yeah...sure. What has that gotten us. The suicide rate amongst men is nearly 4 times higher then women in the US alone back in 2023. That number isn't going down...
So, again. Am I allowed to acknowledge that I have trauma based off my own childhood traumas? The healthy answer is yes! ALL trauma is VALID! Those with trauma regardless of how they got that trauma are VALID and SHOULDN'T be ignored! But, society says we agree except when it comes to men. Men aren't allowed to be traumatized because they have to be strong all the fucking time, take care of others because that's their role! This is called toxic masculinity and it still persists to this fucking day! IN FACT! It's spreading thanks to various events going on in the US. Granted we've come a long ways since the early 2000s for sure! But it just shows how much further we have to go, as still to this day. UNLESS you fit into one of the neat little boxes that society deems as "Acceptable trauma for this category of person" you don't exist. You're experiences with trauma/PTSD aren't valid. These are the fucking LIES society tells us! Especially in the state that I live in! For those that know, it is not a great state. People like to pretend and put on fake happy fucking smiles like the game We Happy Few but it's a front to cover up the suffering.
It doesn't matter if you are a male, female, black, white, straight, gay, queer, trans, or anything else you identify as. Trauma IS trauma! PTSD is a fucking bitch no matter who you are! The more we can realize and understand this the better off we'll be. We all experience traumatic events in our own way and react differently to it. But our own traumas are valid and should be able to seek out help to heal it WITHOUT the judgement and the petty politics about the outlandish arguments of "ONLY THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE TRUAMA!" or "ONLY THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE HARDSHIPS!" We are ALL FUCKING HUMAN! WE ARE ALL LIVING BEINGS! We should be allowed to get the FUCKING help we need and DESERVE! But no...Society says "FUCK YOU! Unless you fall into these specific categories that we tell you are okay to have trauma in. You're not valid...you should feel ashamed for feeling this way." I am soooo fucking SICK AND TIRED of this shit!!
This is why we need to help each other where we can. Be compassionate to the person next to us, the random stranger we see on the bus or walking down the street, or the homeless person sitting on the corner trying to get any kind of help. We as a society let ourselves be led into thinking that we can't deal with our trauma, we can't be allowed to live our authentic selves because why? "OOOOOH it's scary that someone else is living their best life and I'm not. I gotta go make them feel like shit!" If you're this type of person...I have one thing to say to you. Get help! Seriously, get PROFESSIONAL help! Either that or understand that the people around you. They're probably going through some pretty hard times themselves. Instead of beating them down to make yourself feel better for 5 seconds then feeling hallow and empty until you try to get that feeling again. Try helping someone else. Offer a stranger a genuine smile or a genuine compliment.
If everyone who reads this passed on a genuine act of kindness, an act of compassion. Then that person passed on another act of compassion to the next person. Eventually we would have a world where it's mostly filled with compassionate people. But alas, turning the world into a compassionate place seems impossible. So instead lets try helping the people around us and turning those within our lives into compassionate people by treating them with compassion instead.
Sound good? Good.
To those that are out there trying to figure out if what you've experienced with your own trauma is valid. It is! As hard as it may be, never stop trying to seek out the help you deserve and need to help heal!
Anyways, rant over...
So I ask myself, do I have trauma then? Since I'm none of these, I mean I'm a male who has survived abuse but that doesn't count right? Because men who survive abuse, that's clearly not a thing. It only happens to women right? Society would like me to believe that. Society wants to tell me to "Grow the fuck up! Grow a pair! Be a fucking man and suck it up!" Yeah...sure. What has that gotten us. The suicide rate amongst men is nearly 4 times higher then women in the US alone back in 2023. That number isn't going down...
So, again. Am I allowed to acknowledge that I have trauma based off my own childhood traumas? The healthy answer is yes! ALL trauma is VALID! Those with trauma regardless of how they got that trauma are VALID and SHOULDN'T be ignored! But, society says we agree except when it comes to men. Men aren't allowed to be traumatized because they have to be strong all the fucking time, take care of others because that's their role! This is called toxic masculinity and it still persists to this fucking day! IN FACT! It's spreading thanks to various events going on in the US. Granted we've come a long ways since the early 2000s for sure! But it just shows how much further we have to go, as still to this day. UNLESS you fit into one of the neat little boxes that society deems as "Acceptable trauma for this category of person" you don't exist. You're experiences with trauma/PTSD aren't valid. These are the fucking LIES society tells us! Especially in the state that I live in! For those that know, it is not a great state. People like to pretend and put on fake happy fucking smiles like the game We Happy Few but it's a front to cover up the suffering.
It doesn't matter if you are a male, female, black, white, straight, gay, queer, trans, or anything else you identify as. Trauma IS trauma! PTSD is a fucking bitch no matter who you are! The more we can realize and understand this the better off we'll be. We all experience traumatic events in our own way and react differently to it. But our own traumas are valid and should be able to seek out help to heal it WITHOUT the judgement and the petty politics about the outlandish arguments of "ONLY THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE TRUAMA!" or "ONLY THESE TYPES OF PEOPLE ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE HARDSHIPS!" We are ALL FUCKING HUMAN! WE ARE ALL LIVING BEINGS! We should be allowed to get the FUCKING help we need and DESERVE! But no...Society says "FUCK YOU! Unless you fall into these specific categories that we tell you are okay to have trauma in. You're not valid...you should feel ashamed for feeling this way." I am soooo fucking SICK AND TIRED of this shit!!
This is why we need to help each other where we can. Be compassionate to the person next to us, the random stranger we see on the bus or walking down the street, or the homeless person sitting on the corner trying to get any kind of help. We as a society let ourselves be led into thinking that we can't deal with our trauma, we can't be allowed to live our authentic selves because why? "OOOOOH it's scary that someone else is living their best life and I'm not. I gotta go make them feel like shit!" If you're this type of person...I have one thing to say to you. Get help! Seriously, get PROFESSIONAL help! Either that or understand that the people around you. They're probably going through some pretty hard times themselves. Instead of beating them down to make yourself feel better for 5 seconds then feeling hallow and empty until you try to get that feeling again. Try helping someone else. Offer a stranger a genuine smile or a genuine compliment.
If everyone who reads this passed on a genuine act of kindness, an act of compassion. Then that person passed on another act of compassion to the next person. Eventually we would have a world where it's mostly filled with compassionate people. But alas, turning the world into a compassionate place seems impossible. So instead lets try helping the people around us and turning those within our lives into compassionate people by treating them with compassion instead.
Sound good? Good.
To those that are out there trying to figure out if what you've experienced with your own trauma is valid. It is! As hard as it may be, never stop trying to seek out the help you deserve and need to help heal!
Anyways, rant over...
Even now it's still the same way and everywhere I got I'm still not allowed to vent or anything. As if telling me I don't get to vent or talk to anyone while others do.
And all my life I was forced to allow everyone to pick on me and call me every name in the book and I was forced to just stand there and pretend nothing happened.
As a result of this and the choices made by certain people I can't name on here. I struggle with extreme depression, extreme anxiety, paranoia, a victim complex, an inferiority complex, PTSD, and even struggle with thoughts of suicide.
And I'm physical proof that the whole sticks and stones saying is bullshit. Because 20 or more years of being put through that witnessing of hell took a toll on me. I had to have my colon removed, almost lost my kidneys, and now my asthma after leaving me alone for 30 years has returned with a vengeance.
As a result I can't even afford a therapist or a psychiatrist because of how most of the money I make from a job that works me to death and not give a damn about my health issues and such, has to go to all the hospital bills and such.
So yeah I second this as I too am a witness of how that can destroy someone physically, mentally, and emotionally if not taken care of. No one should ever have to experience what others like you and me go through.
Thank You for your time.
Definitely am hoping that there are places out there that can help more people so this shit can FINALLY stop in it's tracks and people can finally be heard AND SEEN!
Hopefully you're able to get help to help you work through your trauma. I'm rooting for you, as no one should have to relive the same moment repeatedly for years.
But stopping and doing nothing can be great! Also just slowing down and smelling the flowers as it were really helps too, especially if you go for a walk in nature. Just being grateful for the things you have and being able to go for the walk in nature can help a lot with reinforcing those positive thoughts and feelings. Or even calm things as Anxiety tends to like to tell us all the things we're losing or going to lose. When in reality we have a lot already. <3 <3
I would love to go for a walk in the park, but when you're alone it's not fun to do anything but yourself. Also summer is starting here and it's very hot, and I get sunburnt easily so I mostly walk around indoors at the shops and stuff 😂 Right now I mostly play video games to relax ^^
That is fair. I haven't gone to walk in the park a lot lately for some of the same excuses I've given myself, "It's too hot, I don't wanna be alone, etc" When I had Shadow, things were easier as he'd get me out of the house to take him for a walk haha. But hey, right now whatever you can do to feel good works well. Though I'd still try and see if you can find some way to get a walk in somewhere outside. It'll really help your mental state to be out in nature, even if it means going out later or earlier in the day when it's cooler.