I have been following a 16+ Twitch channel for about four weeks and was starting to feel comfortable there.
In this space, no one is allowed to use the word “yiff” in a 16+ stream — but that wasn’t the issue. I got timed out for showing symbolic vulnerability.
The streamer says “everyone is welcome,” but it didn’t feel that way to me. It felt more like control than safety, and I felt hurt and unwelcome.
My openness isn’t unsafe, and I won’t change who I am to fit someone else’s comfort zone. I’ll look for Twitch spaces where I can be myself. The mods are over‑censoring — I feel like I’m on eggshells. Rules are not clear enough either.
I still really like the streamer — I just wish the space felt as inclusive as they say it is. If someone could help me with this issue, I’d appreciate it a huge ton, because I feel like the streamer and mods won’t understand me. I can tell you their channel name in DM to keep their privacy.
Another issue happened on Wednesday 10th/09. The stream was an exercise in their furry characters. I used TTS — it said, “Your posture is all wrong, try harder you furry bum.” I tried to explain it in chat, but I wasn’t able to because the shitty mod told me to drop it, like my voice didn’t matter.
It made me feel unwelcome. It’s silencing.
I’m getting so pissed with all this bullshit. I can’t be myself. Everyone is far too serious and it’s pissing me off. FUCK sake.
The stream was 18+, but I really like the streamer. Nothing gets explained to me effectively.
I feel like having Autism is a curse. I don’t understand why it’s hard for me to understand. It’s pissing me off because this is giving me problems. I feel like crying.
In both streams, that makes the whole thing even more frustrating — because instead of engaging with my intent, they shut it down without explanation, leaving me stuck in that awful limbo of “I can’t even clarify what I meant.”
For someone who communicates best when there’s room to explain, it’s not just frustrating — it’s like they’ve taken away my ability to be understood.
This has made my anxiety much worse, on top of FOMO that’s in my bio. FOMO also gives me anxiety.
This is why autism awareness matters — because this is what happens.
I’m getting sick of being treated like this on FA and Twitch, like I’m some heartless furry bastard. Too many don’t give a crap how they might make the other person feel.
From what I have gone through on FA and on Twitch, I thought the furry fandom was a welcoming place. There is no excuse for any of this behaviour. If there’s an issue, talk about it.
This is so much emotional weight to carry all on my own. My mum won’t understand it because these are complex feelings in the furry fandom.
Update 13th/09: Got freaking banned from chat for being upset. I’m getting freaking sick of this shit. I’m allowed to be upset and show symbolic vulnerability. Fuck this. People suck. Life sucks. No one understands meee. Fuck my life. I’m literally crying and angry.
One streamer — we have sorted it out. We are on good terms.