Je suis tired (tw: suicide mention)
4 days ago
I eventually im gonna have to come clean about the big scary health thing but
Just know that it contributed to me probably losing my job that took two years to get
And I'm very close to taking my own life
And I'm so so so so tired of fighting and struggling and being jobless and broke and a pathetic piece of shit and sick af and everything else under the goddamned sun moon and stars
I've Had it
I'm so fucking done
Just know that it contributed to me probably losing my job that took two years to get
And I'm very close to taking my own life
And I'm so so so so tired of fighting and struggling and being jobless and broke and a pathetic piece of shit and sick af and everything else under the goddamned sun moon and stars
I've Had it
I'm so fucking done
Ihate this god damned country
why should YOU kill yourself because thE UNITED STATES is a shithole?
NEVER blame yourself for someTHing THat is obviously not your fault.
The reason I say that is because even after all of that things did eventually come together for me. I don't have to ride a bicycle miles just to pick up simple stuff, and things have gotten way better.
I had so many thoughts of self harm, and came close a few times. When I would I'd remember what my Mom said. Things are always changing, and there is always a chance to make things better, but if you end everything your problems will never have a chance to be resolved. Its a permanent solution to temporary problems.
I would say to call the suicide hotline, and seek whatever help you can. Life is a precious thing, and I may not know you, but that doesn't mean I don't care. You are special, and I want nothing more than to see you succeed.
I am sorry about the horrible things going on, and I just hope they get resolved quickly. I also hope to see you around in the future. Again you are special and your life does matter. Just hang in there and I'm sure things will get better.
It's easy to feel like giving up when everything's gone to shit, but really, it's pretty clear at this point you're no quitter. You just forgot cause you've got the head into this mess.
Good things happen eventually anyway, even to people who stay terribly sick for a long, long time. I'm proof of that, so don't let go.
Hang in there. I believe in you.
Even if I can't help in the long run.
I wish I could help, you're awesome regardless.
Please stay strong and seek the hotline.
Love lots.