I kind of know how this can be, and sometimes the only thing to be done is give it time, constantly remind yourself that it is okay, you are still friends, which is the best outcome. It takes a lot of just self reassurance.

I know this is not quite the same, but over the last 2 weeks I was considering permanently giving up on art, because I was so stressed out and anxious, and it was forcing me into a very self loathing state of mind, and I didn't want to quit, I did want it to end, but it kept lingering in my head that it would just be easier, that I did not have the mind for it, and that it was just no longer for me. It took some time and some encouragement from a friend of mine that I just needed to cut myself some slack, there is no right or wrong way, and that even though I didn't have all the opportunities that he may have been given, there is nothing I can do about it, all I can do is focus on what I can do now, to get better. I think the same applies here, what is in the past, is in the past, it is a lesson of learning, we are not perfect beings, we can only act, fail, learn, try again,

Just know that things are only over, and I need to take my own advice here, thins are only over when you have resigned yourself to not get up and carry on.

I know this song helped me getting through my inner turmoil, maybe it will help you, remind you that you are not alone, this is something many others have experienced:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGtBtRClzQ8