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It's so so weird
15 years ago
Dey see me rollin, dey hatin!
When you're struggling through life, trying to be happy and yet you ignore the people around you. In my case, I ignored a lot of my friends and I probably missed and lost out on a lot of fun opportunities. Nothing ever went so far as a night out for a sapless time at the club, or a trip to see a movie.. I never really focused on these kinda outings, it was like I was afraid id get attached to these people.. My friends of years! Some of them had been my friends even before high school.. I've just always had that fear and doubt.. I don't trust very often and I'm a bit startled by true commitment.. I sometimes panic, just because I know I'm putting my own well-being (heart) at risk and that can really freak me out! I'll make bad choices and rarely, if I'm not thinking properly- I can sabotage my own happiness... I don't mean to, I'm not thinking "I'm going to do this.." But it ALWAYS happens.
At any rate, it's been a recurring thing.. But I'm glad to say that I think and truly believe I have met my right match :)
A good guy he was, there talking to me forever and bringing up my confidence but I never took him too seriously (like stated before, it made me uneasy to get close).
We went out a few times harmlessly during the summer to see Inglorious Bastards, Law Abiding Citizen.. It was fun.. It wasn't until a month or so after that he confessed to me how he really felt, and like usual I wanted to dodge it because I was scared..
I dunno how he did it, blind sided me really.. All I know is that I did fall for him too, but not until a few months later. Sure I started FEELING him and started liking him a lot, but I have never felt myself fall so hard for a guy in my LIFE.
Now we're nearly inseparable, we know all about what each other does.. (Yeah, he was kinda skeptical about the camming job, but he got over it- since it's a temporary thing and brings in nice $ to go towards a new apartment) And he's even talking about getting engagement rings! *Big gasp* Scary step, but I love the guy enough to take that plunge, I swear.
Although we didn't officially get together until Nov really... I like to say our anniversary is in September.. Just for the fact he had me in his sight, we were talking.. And he never gave up on me.
It's just funny sometimes, people shouldn't always look so far for love.. Sometimes it's right beside you. :)
End rant/or whatever this is.
At any rate, it's been a recurring thing.. But I'm glad to say that I think and truly believe I have met my right match :)
A good guy he was, there talking to me forever and bringing up my confidence but I never took him too seriously (like stated before, it made me uneasy to get close).
We went out a few times harmlessly during the summer to see Inglorious Bastards, Law Abiding Citizen.. It was fun.. It wasn't until a month or so after that he confessed to me how he really felt, and like usual I wanted to dodge it because I was scared..
I dunno how he did it, blind sided me really.. All I know is that I did fall for him too, but not until a few months later. Sure I started FEELING him and started liking him a lot, but I have never felt myself fall so hard for a guy in my LIFE.
Now we're nearly inseparable, we know all about what each other does.. (Yeah, he was kinda skeptical about the camming job, but he got over it- since it's a temporary thing and brings in nice $ to go towards a new apartment) And he's even talking about getting engagement rings! *Big gasp* Scary step, but I love the guy enough to take that plunge, I swear.
Although we didn't officially get together until Nov really... I like to say our anniversary is in September.. Just for the fact he had me in his sight, we were talking.. And he never gave up on me.
It's just funny sometimes, people shouldn't always look so far for love.. Sometimes it's right beside you. :)
End rant/or whatever this is.
Just be sure to live and love life NO MATTER WHAT and you'll be happy!!!!! :3
Latah
Then, getting really comfortable and peeing in the pool" 8D
We're so perfect! haha
Relationships are something that there is no manual for, whatsoever. Everyone has their own ideals, their own experiences, and their own expectations and such, so it's different for everybody. And some times they can just sneak up on you. Or, for example, you end up in a relationship that's going really well, and then you come by someone that, as you get to know them better, you end up connecting with them better than whom you're currently in a relationship with. It's hard.
However, the general rule with being happy, is to just go with the flow. The more stress you put onto relationships can be comparable to simple physics. The more heat you transfer into a can of beans for example, over time there's always the chance of it violently exploding. The more stress and drama/miscommunication you put into relationships, the more chance there will be that they may explode.
That doesn't however mean that there shouldn't be a little stress, because that can sometimes translate to passion. But the trick is to be able to identify the two, and take stress less seriously, to diffuse into passion. X3
... Or something. >_>
My own experiences have been between heart-shatteringly horrible, to just waking up one day not having feeling for X person any more after a civil communication. One of my previous relationships I still talk with every now and then. But otherwise, now-a-days, my happiness is with my closest friends - that we're more like twins seperated at birth, jokes of wincest used often - and the fact we're all proud bachelors4life and fit together so perfectly like a triad that was meant to be. XD
no, seriously. if your parents/religion isn't rushing you into it just so you can cohabitate peacefully, what is the hurry? ;3 if you can't stand a long engagement, you won't be able to stand "til death do us part".
no-fun nagging aside, i'm really happy to hear that you've found someone when you weren't really looking. that's kind of when it gets you.
I hope I can I can find that special someone in my life someday as well.
But I am happy anyways, if anyone finds love either be it across the sea ( like me ) or near them ( like you ) it's fine as long as it's true love and it lasts as long as you can imagine. :D
Congrats, you deserve it after the past. ^^
P.S.- And Hi. :D
(Glad to see that you're back too. Haven't see any art from you in a long time.)